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Promise Enforcers - Men Only! We make Promise Keepers look like homers! No homosexuals or women allowed!

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Old 03-15-2015, 11:27 PM
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Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
cross Erectile Dysfunction: God's Second Greatest Gift!

First off, any woman past her breeding years who demands to be seeded has stumbled and fallen down the slippery slope of lecherous whoredom!

Don't let that haggard, hellbound, spunk-hungry cow drag you down with her, brothers! Remember what happened when Adam harkened to Eve's evil promptings, against his better judgement?

That being said, when Christ has mercifully allowed your callused, weatherworn prick to breathe it's last gasp.....REJOYCE!!

He is saying to you, "At ease, soldier...lay down your weapon, and rest your weary head...don't you cry no more. Your work here is done, good fellow, be at peace and let the nightmare of countless years of marital copulation flee before the coming light of a new dawn. Whatever slight and fleeting fascination, if any, you may have had for your wife's unclean zone, bristling with it's unknown horrors, has now come to pass. At ease, thou battle hardened veteran of My militant breeding agenda. Consider yourself honorably discharged..."

Praise Jesus, what a gift!

I implore you then, Brethren, to accept this gift with grace! Do not reject the long-awaited flaccidity that Christ gives us so freely in our dotage! I eagerly await the day God deflates my schlong and allows it to collapse under it's own weight, to be troubled no more...Thank you in advance, Jesus*. Amen.

*the sooner the better, Lord.
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Old 03-16-2015, 01:06 AM
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Default Re: Erectile Dysfunction: God's Second Greatest Gift!

It is no coincidence that Viagra and Cialis both have 6 letters, like Diablo (messicant for devil). 3 words, 6 letters. 666. No coincidence my friends. Be warned.
And all 3 words have the second and third letter the same. The first letters are next to each other on the keyboard. It's all part of Satan's plan to turn us into fornicators and adulterers.
Accept your floppiness with pride. Love your droop. It's what Jesus wants.
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Old 03-16-2015, 02:57 AM
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bible Re: Erectile Dysfunction: God's Second Greatest Gift!

Psalms 29:11
The LORD will give strength unto his people; the LORD will bless his people with peace.


Thank you Brother Hammer, for the encouragement! I've been praying for this for quite a few years for now as marital duties are chores that I would gladly cast aside to concentrate more thoroughly on my Bible study. I rarely ask anything for myself in my prayers except of some well-deserved luxury items and prestige among the secular scholars who mock my research but I've been asking for this permanence of the flaccid state and I'm happy to say that the angle of the unfortunate swelling is now seemingly much less prominent when it happens. Jesus helps us in so many ways. Glory. I'm so happy I can discuss this with someone. This can also help aspiring sodomites.

Psalms 119:153
RESH. Consider mine affliction, and deliver me: for I do not forget thy law.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer
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Old 03-16-2015, 07:23 AM
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lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Erectile Dysfunction: God's Second Greatest Gift!

True, as soon you have fulfilled your male duty to bring Christian children, and spanked them diligently according to Proverbs 13:24, so called erectile dysfunction is God's plan to prevent him from being led into temptation.

According to Christian Commission on Human Rights (CCHR), the use of hormonal drugs must stop. Hormonal drugs include anabolic steroids, viagra, contraceptives and insulin.

Last edited by lukasekman; 03-16-2015 at 07:24 AM. Reason: Removed some junk
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Old 03-17-2015, 02:27 AM
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Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Erectile Dysfunction: God's Second Greatest Gift!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elmer G. White View Post
Psalms 29:11
The LORD will give strength unto his people; the LORD will bless his people with peace.


Thank you Brother Hammer, for the encouragement! I've been praying for this for quite a few years for now as marital duties are chores that I would gladly cast aside to concentrate more thoroughly on my Bible study. I rarely ask anything for myself in my prayers except of some well-deserved luxury items and prestige among the secular scholars who mock my research but I've been asking for this permanence of the flaccid state and I'm happy to say that the angle of the unfortunate swelling is now seemingly much less prominent when it happens. Jesus helps us in so many ways. Glory. I'm so happy I can discuss this with someone. This can also help aspiring sodomites.

Psalms 119:153
RESH. Consider mine affliction, and deliver me: for I do not forget thy law.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer
A chore indeed, Brother. Just like plunging a severely clogged toilet, minus the element of satisfaction. The only way I can maintain my torpidity during the act is to hold firm to the certainty that Jesus is right there behind me, wheedling softly in my ear, "I paid your ransom with My blood, underling! Now you will perform this unclean task for My sake! Or would you prefer to be cast into hellfire?"
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Old 03-19-2015, 09:01 PM
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Default Re: Erectile Dysfunction: God's Second Greatest Gift!

Iowa politician reading pornography on the house floor.

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