General Church Fellowship A place for True Christians to join in praise, faith and fellowship. |
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Distinguished Professor of Prayer Healing and Creation Zoology (Baraminology) Victim of atheist scientific persecution
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Posts: 10,336
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: On a mission in Godless Europistan
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Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-11-2016, 06:12 PM
Happy Birthday Brother!
In this world swarming with revolting homertrash, it is a comfort to know that there are still people who fight relentlessly against this obstacle for Salvation and also battle other, lesser evils! May Jesus show you His exquisite Love also during the next rotations of the Beloved Sun (Genesis 1:16) around the Earth!
2 Timothy 4:7
I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith:
Yours in Christ,
Elmer
2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.
PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
Check out our Research in Creation Science:
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Possibly retarded pothead
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Posts: 1,003
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Here in Babylon
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Re: Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-11-2016, 11:23 PM
Happy Birthday Brother Harold! I will dedicate the spliff I am rolling just now to you.
Sing unto God, sing praises to his name: Extol him that rideth upon the heavens By his name JAH, and rejoice before him.-Psalms 68:4
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Gushing for Jesus
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Posts: 23,742
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-12-2016, 12:39 AM
Happy Birthday dear Brother in Christ!
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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True Christian™ Beauty Queen
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Posts: 5,447
Join Date: Dec 2007
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Re: Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-12-2016, 01:17 AM
Happy birthday, Brother Porter! Another year of serving the Lord, and hopefully not too many left to go! PRAISE!
Let Jesus Christ Wash You Clean
in 2016
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Landover Senior Outreach Touching Men, Women and Children with the Good News!
True Christian™
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Posts: 8,237
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Freehold Senior Estates
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Re: Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-12-2016, 01:57 AM
Which one of you sent me this? On my celebrated day that I was born to serve Christ? I'll have you all know that I AM fag-free now for almost 20 years, praise Jesus for His grace in helping me out of my filthy choice to be queer. I am NOT a homo anymore.
Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
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South of the Border outreach program True Christian™
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Posts: 13,156
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Godly Midwest
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Re: Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-12-2016, 02:48 AM
Have a blessed Birthday, Brother!
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Warning: In case of Rapture, this account will be unmanned.
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Posts: 7,220
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-12-2016, 03:10 AM
A very blessed Birthday to my brother who mentored me into True Christianity™ and saved me from a life of debauchery and sin.
.....any chance I can get my leaf blower back?
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-12-2016, 05:14 AM
Praise Jesus and Happy Birthday, Brother HP. Many happy returns of the day.
Don't forget to send your robust Birthday Love Offering over as soon as possible. Baby Jesus needs a new pair of shoes.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,984
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
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Re: Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-12-2016, 11:50 PM
Happy birthday, brother Harold! I have spent hours and hours trying to picture you in homosexual situations, and it's hard. Really, really hard. Because you are one of the least gay people I know!
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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Serving Jesus
True Christian™
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Posts: 4,470
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Godly Texas, Besieged by Papist Idol Worshippers
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Re: Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-13-2016, 01:35 AM
Again? You must be getting pretty long of tooth, Brother. Happy Birthday to you!
God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: Have a Blessed Birthday, Brother Harold Porter! -
03-14-2016, 01:33 AM
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