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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-26-2009, 04:20 AM

I am offended by the incredible amount of nerdery in this thread. It has gotten to the point where my hands hurt and my fingers are on the verge of bleeding from striking the keys so darn (lord forgive me) hard.



The ion cannon would completely own any federation star cruiser.


Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.



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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-27-2009, 12:26 AM

I'm offended by people who are offended by nerdery (cute word, by the way). Nerdliness is the key to a happy life.


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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-27-2009, 12:39 AM

I love the show Supernatural. But i hate how it demonizes wicca and other religions. But i love the fact that the angels in the show say that God is dead.
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-27-2009, 01:36 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
I'm offended by people who are offended by nerdery (cute word, by the way). Nerdliness is the key to a happy life.
I assume that "nerdliness" is your euphemism for satan worship.

Quote:
Originally Posted by UnSaved Scum View Post
I love the show Supernatural. But i hate how it demonizes wicca and other religions. But i love the fact that the angels in the show say that God is dead.
I hope you both understand that no one here gives a tinker's damn about your petty, unsaved opinions. This is God's favorite forum, and we follow His commandments!

Quote:
"Whosoever transgresseth, and abideth not in the doctrine of Christ, hath not God. He that abideth in the doctrine of Christ, he hath both the Father and the Son. If there come any unto you, and bring not this doctrine, receive him not into your house, neither bid him God speed: For he that biddeth him God speed is partaker of his evil deeds" -- 2 John 1:9-11


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-27-2009, 02:17 AM

Sister JennyD, that was the most beautiful explanation I've ever seen of Christianity.

HALLELUJAH!!!
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-27-2009, 10:58 PM

I am offended by Scottish people. A whole nation of gingers (ginger, by the way, is an anagram of a certain term for a certain other cursed race. Coincidence, or proof of an intelligently designed language?) You can tell God was having a bit of a laugh when He came up with that idea. I am also offended by the way you just can't tell if young people are boys or girls nowadays. Can I speculate about whether this person would make a good wife, or would doing that make me an abomination unto God? I just can't tell anymore!


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-28-2009, 07:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
I assume that "nerdliness" is your euphemism for satan worship.
No, actually. Nerdliness: the state of being Nerdly (ei. "Nerdliness [being Nerdly] brings happiness"), or the degree to which one is Nerdly (ei. "After assessing your Nerdliness, I find you not to be Nerdly"). I really do enjoy the word "Nerdery", I'm going to have to keep it and add it to my Dictionary of Nerdly terms. ("Nerdly", by the way is just a cuter way of saying "Nerdy". "L"s seem to make words cuter. Which does not mean that I want more than one single "L" in my name, by the way.)

I'm offended by the fact that people automatically assume that I worship Satan because 1) I'm goth, 2) I'm Pagan, or 3) I'm a Witch - or a combination of the three. I've never met Satan. I do not worship Him. He's not one of my gods. End of story.


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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-28-2009, 01:18 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
I am offended by Scottish people. A whole nation of gingers (ginger, by the way, is an anagram of a certain term for a certain other cursed race. Coincidence, or proof of an intelligently designed language?) You can tell God was having a bit of a laugh when He came up with that idea.
Brother Temptations and I rest our briefcases:


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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-28-2009, 01:22 PM

I am offended by ethnic foods that spice up the blood.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-28-2009, 02:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
I've never met Satan. I do not worship Him.
I'm offended by the fact that you capitalized a pronoun referring to the devil.


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-28-2009, 04:11 PM

I'm offended by this perverse "under the sheets" game.


Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-28-2009, 04:45 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
I am offended by ethnic foods that spice up the blood.
Me too. God gave us burgers for a reason. I'm not entirely sure why dothead food exists, but I suspect Satan was heavily involved throughout the process.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Rev. M. Rodimer Rev. M. Rodimer is offline
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-28-2009, 04:53 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
Me too. God gave us burgers for a reason. I'm not entirely sure why dothead food exists, but I suspect Satan was heavily involved throughout the process.
Perhaps it's a punishment from God for their failure to become Christian!


Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-28-2009, 04:54 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
Oh, Reverend. I'm sorry. My meaning was unclear in that thread. I meant as in:

Acts 10:11
And saw heaven opened, and a certain vessel descending upon him, as it had been a great sheet knit at the four corners, and let down to the earth.

I can see the source of confusion here, though. I will make sure and update that thread.


Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.



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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-30-2009, 02:03 AM

People who pick on polacks. (See "make it worse" thread.)


Mark 16:17 And these attesting signs will accompany those who believe: in My Name they will drive out demons.

1 Kings 21:14 Then they sent to Jezebel, saying, Naboth is stoned . . .

A SPIRITUAL WARFARE PRAYER:
Father, In Jesus' Name, I take the Blood of Jesus and break the power of all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, wiccans, pagans, and any other source, and all of their rituals off of us. With the Blood of Jesus, I erase all evil lines drawn on our liver. . .

LANDOVER BAPTIST DEMON HUNTING PERMIT #00666-27





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Sungstra Sungstra is offline
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How dumb can you get?

 
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 09-30-2009, 02:07 AM

People who use that text-talk in every day conversation

When my favourite TV shows are canceled

When it is cold and I am in my pyjamas.
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 10-02-2009, 07:59 AM

I'm offended by people who tell me that smoking's bad for me when I'm trying to enjoy a cigarette. Everyone who smokes knows that it's bad for them, leave me the hell alone when I'm trying to enjoy my smoke, you nosey bastards! Grrrr. (Sorry. Nosey people really irk me, hehe.)


This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. --ADMIN
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 10-02-2009, 01:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
I'm offended by people who tell me that smoking's bad for me when I'm trying to enjoy a cigarette. Everyone who smokes knows that it's bad for them, leave me the hell alone when I'm trying to enjoy my smoke, you nosey bastards! Grrrr. (Sorry. Nosey people really irk me, hehe.)
I'm offended by noisy witches who whine about the trivia of their lives but neglect the certain damnation of their soul!


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 10-02-2009, 07:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
I'm offended by noisy witches who whine about the trivia of their lives but neglect the certain damnation of their soul!
I'm offended by cranky people who pick on me for the smallest reasons, when I'm not the one hiding a tutu-wearing bear in his basement.


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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 10-02-2009, 08:35 PM

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Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
I'm not the one hiding a tutu-wearing bear in his basement.
Jesus (the) Christ! You mean Pastor Ezekiel Knows such a "person"?
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