HOME WELCOME! FORUMS Register FAQ Calendar
Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > The introduction forum
Reload this Page Hi?
The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Shabitty Shabitty is offline
Unsaved trash, God-mocking Gametard
Under Investigation
  
Posts: 3
Join Date: Jul 2009
Shabitty is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Hi? - 10-28-2009, 09:22 PM
So, I made a thread a long time ago because my friend thought it would be funny, and coming back to this I think I'd like to be serious about this place. What do I have to do?
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
Ofc. Don W. Richards's Avatar
Ofc. Don W. Richards Ofc. Don W. Richards is offline
True Christian™ Officer of THE Law
True Christian™

True Christian Provider™ award Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tin Tither The Lord’s Witness Wound Heaven Bound TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Justice of the Peace Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Ribfest '09 Teabag Patriot Punched the most queers Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once One Year/1000 posts Persecuted Porn Resistant Eats the Most Pork True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior

 
Posts: 490
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Freehold Iowa, God's Favorite City!
Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ofc. Don W. Richards is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Hi? - 10-28-2009, 09:24 PM
So in other words you came here to antagonize us for our religion, right?

If you want to get saved and become a True Christian, the pastors here will be more than happy to help you. If you want to make trouble and mock us, just forget it.

Latest Headlines From Sheriff's Office:

Sheriff Richards Rescues Wayward Wife from the Influence of Evil Neighbor Kids

Sheriff Richards Busts Up Satanic Cult Operating out of local Haunted House

Sheriff Richards a Hero for saving Dying Man

Sheriff Richards Schools the Amish in Scripture

7 Year-Old Coveter Learns the Hard Way

Sheriff Richards cleans up 4-way stop

Sheriff Richards busts Arch Nemesis, Shane!

FPD to Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus Ordinance

Sheriff Don W. Richards Cleans Up County Roads
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Christian Love Real American™ Tithing Manager Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Senior Pastor Teabag Patriot TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Eats the Most Pork True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Nuts for JESUS! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Mower Donald Trump 2016! Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Bathfire Crown of Life Alternative Facts Probing for Jesus 20,000 posts Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 22,745
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Hi? - 10-28-2009, 09:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shabitty View Post
So, I made a thread a long time ago because my friend thought it would be funny, and coming back to this I think I'd like to be serious about this place. What do I have to do?
THIS was the post that started it. It is filled with venom and challenges Landover and thus God.

I think the way forward here (and Landover is as forgiving as God) is to accept Jesus, follow His Words, and introduce yourself in the Introduction Forum.




“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
HTannor's Avatar
HTannor HTannor is offline
America's Most Fair and Balanced Judge
True Christian™

True Christian™ Tin Tither Real American™ Christian Love Protected by JESUS Heaven Bound Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Punched the most queers Teabag Patriot One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Pro-Life Porn Resistant TC Bravery True Christian Hotrodder Eats the Most Pork True Republican Proud Niglet Sponsorer

 
Posts: 2,611
Join Date: Jun 2009
HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!HTannor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Hi? - 10-28-2009, 10:35 PM
Well, Shabbity, Brother Ezekiel Bathfire, who has a long memory, found your old, blasphemous post.

It is clear you have a great deal to atone for and you can start now. Letting us know how you have now found Jesus and are making up for your sins against Him are a good point to begin with.

How have you found Jesus? What is your favorite bible verse? What is the name of the church your are attending?

The Honorable HTannor (Pro NRA, Anti-Homer Marriage), Judge, Freehold Supreme Court

"Credo elvem etiam vivere"
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved

Send an email to the Senior Pastor - Landover Baptist Church - Top