Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum A Christian Help Forum led by Sister Daisy Mae Johnson. Warning! Sometimes the Lord's advice is a hard pill to swallow. |
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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-26-2007, 09:31 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield
I say we offer her a scholarship. If she dresses anything like that avatar it's an emergency for Christ. We must pull together to get her saved. One soul at a time.
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I agree Brother Eliot. These kind of emergencies require True Christian™ Tolerance and understanding.
Kiki, I'm sure Pastor Eno would be far more understanding if you could possibly "cover up?"
Our Pastors are not used to seeing females revealing flesh other than when they go out Ministering or Evangelizing at a local Pole Dancing Emporium or Praying to The Lord in front of their Computers whilst looking for sleazy Websites to close down.
You see Kiki, I've started a trend here in Freehold to help Save your Soul.
But we need your help too.
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-26-2007, 03:09 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Talitha
I agree Brother Eliot. These kind of emergencies require True Christian™ Tolerance and understanding.
Kiki, I'm sure Pastor Eno would be far more understanding if you could possibly "cover up?"
Our Pastors are not used to seeing females revealing flesh other than when they go out Ministering or Evangelizing at a local Pole Dancing Emporium or Praying to The Lord in front of their Computers whilst looking for sleazy Websites to close down.
You see Kiki, I've started a trend here in Freehold to help Save your Soul.
But we need your help too.
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I have changed my avatar. Sorry for the other one.
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-26-2007, 03:36 PM
I'm proud of you Kiki! You are making excellent progress. In fact, I think I will start calling you Sister Kiki!
GLORY!
L ve, Sister Thumper
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-26-2007, 03:44 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde
I'm proud of you Kiki! You are making excellent progress. In fact, I think I will start calling you Sister Kiki!
GLORY!
L ve, Sister Thumper
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Thank you Th but I'm not yet a christian,so I don't know if I deserve the honor of being called yours or all of the LBC's sister. In all fairness you might feel differently if I don't become a christian but I am trying to be alittle more respectful on here.
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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-26-2007, 07:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by kikirnw
Thank you Th but I'm not yet a christian,so I don't know if I deserve the honor of being called yours or all of the LBC's sister. In all fairness you might feel differently if I don't become a christian but I am trying to be alittle more respectful on here.
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Of course you are our Sister Kiki. Not in the family way (although I realise you once were) of being a Sister but a Sister in the Biblical sense. We Ladies of Landover all share a closeness never found amongst Secular heathen Women.
Genesis 12:13
Say, I pray thee, thou art my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee.
I certainly approve of your new picture Sister Kiki.
It shows an attractiveness and modesty 100% worthy of a Christian Lady.
Jesus certainly smiled on us when he guided you here.
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-26-2007, 07:46 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Talitha
Of course you are our Sister Kiki. Not in the family way (although I realise you once were) of being a Sister but a Sister in the Biblical sense. We Ladies of Landover all share a closeness never found amongst Secular heathen Women.
Genesis 12:13
Say, I pray thee, thou art my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee.
I certainly approve of your new picture Sister Kiki.
It shows an attractiveness and modesty 100% worthy of a Christian Lady.
Jesus certainly smiled on us when he guided you here.
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Thank you for your kind words. I am at the moment speachless. A first for me.
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God Squad
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 06:52 AM
The longest journey begins with a single step. You've taken that first step!
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 08:59 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by kikirnw
Thank you for your kind words. I am at the moment speachless. A first for me.
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That's a really good start Kiki. As you should know, True Christian™ generally have to be silent whilst among their Menfolk.
I'm getting more proud of you by the day.
Do you ever travel to Iowa Kiki? Perhaps one day we could meet up and do Lunch.
I'd simply love to talk to you face to face about Jesus and stuff.
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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God Squad
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 09:45 AM
Let the light of the Lord fill your soul. I will pray for you and you will be in my thoughts.
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 09:52 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield
Let the light of the Lord fill your soul. I will pray for you and you will be in my thoughts.
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I certainly hope Jesus fills mine too Brother Eliot.
I shall Pray on that very thought.
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
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Location: Red Peking
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 09:55 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield
I say we offer her a scholarship. If she dresses anything like that avatar it's an emergency for Christ. We must pull together to get her saved. One soul at a time.
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And how many souls are you thinking she has?
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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God Squad
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Posts: 9,322
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Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 10:20 AM
I knew there would be at least one dingbat to not understand what I meant.
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 10:26 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield
I knew there would be at least one dingbat to not understand what I meant.
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So for the benefit of the 'dingbats' here, please do explain yourself.
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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God Squad
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 10:36 AM
first Kiki's soul and then another. If only there was hope for you.
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 10:41 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield
first Kiki's soul and then another. If only there was hope for you.
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Well the way in which you wrote the words was ambiguous, mister picky!
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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True Christian™ Theologian
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 11:07 AM
Have you accepted Jesus as your personal Saviour yet, kiki?
Jesus knows you have sinned extensively, confess your sins woman.
It is time to start repenting of your past life, and be reborn, and receive new life in Jesus Christ!
BTW Rachel.. Stop derailing the thread in order to try and keep kiki away from Salvation.
You servant of satan!
If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
Last edited by SalvationSeeker; 04-27-2007 at 11:08 AM.
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 11:39 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SalvationSeeker
Have you accepted Jesus as your personal Saviour yet, kiki?
Jesus knows you have sinned extensively, confess your sins woman.
It is time to start repenting of your past life, and be reborn, and receive new life in Jesus Christ!
BTW Rachel.. Stop derailing the thread in order to try and keep kiki away from Salvation.
You servant of satan!
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Honestly, I was only trying to understand how it is Eliot plans to bring Kiki to the point where she is ready to fall to her knees and be filled with the love of jesus. Honestly, you men are so darn snarky.
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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God Squad
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 11:45 AM
If you're so curious, come to the camp and you'll see for yourself. We'll have a week long adults only course.
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 12:11 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield
If you're so curious, come to the camp and you'll see for yourself. We'll have a week long adults only course.
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Is that the one that involves 'spankological therapy for especially egregious sinners'?
Maybe.....uuhhhh..... Kiki might benefit from that more than me.
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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God Squad
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Helping Kiki become a True Christian™ -
04-27-2007, 12:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
Is that the one that involves 'spankological therapy for especially egregious sinners'?
Maybe.....uuhhhh..... Kiki might benefit from that more than me.
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I often have no idea what you are talking about, and this is one of those times.
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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