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The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

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James Of Lusitania's Avatar
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Smile Hello - 07-04-2009, 09:13 PM

Hello, brothers and sisters.

For many years I was a sinner. I had sex with countless women and played immoral video-games.
Then I took a Masters Degree in Mechanical and Aerospace Engineering... and it was good as nothing. I really found nothing that would justify my existence.

I want to be in touch again with Jesus.

Thanks you, and may God and His Holy Son Jesus bless you all.
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Default Re: Hello - 07-04-2009, 11:41 PM

Welcome James,

Isn't that a "4chan meme" in your avatar? We all know 4chan is the hotbed of sin on the internet with child porn, gay porn, unfunny memes, and the butchering of the English language on a daily basis.



Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.

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Default Re: Hello - 07-04-2009, 11:49 PM

I was disturbed to see that image again. If you're a godless atheist, you might as well just say so.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Default Re: Hello - 07-04-2009, 11:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Of Lusitania View Post
[...]I really found nothing that would justify my existence.[...]
I imagine that Jesus thinks the same of you.

How do you propose to start a New Life with Your Savior?





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Default Re: Hello - 07-05-2009, 01:54 AM

Looks like this perverted puppy ran off and got hit by a truck.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Hello - 07-05-2009, 04:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. Jim Osborne View Post
Isn't that a "4chan meme" in your avatar? We all know 4chan is the hotbed of sin on the internet with child porn, gay porn, unfunny memes, and the butchering of the English language on a daily basis.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King View Post
I was disturbed to see that image again. If you're a godless atheist, you might as well just say so.
I just googled "4chan meme", and I don't find my dog in there? This is the dog from All Dogs Go To Heaven movie that my friend Sister Lúcia sent me via e-mail.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
How do you propose to start a New Life with Your Savior?
Doing exactly what I did for the past year with my ministers, I guess.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Looks like this perverted puppy ran off and got hit by a truck.
I don't know exactly what you're trying to do, but that's not a very good thing to say. My dog died this way last week. And I'm in a different time-zone.


Whoever sacrifices to any god, except the Lord alone, shall be doomed. (Exodus 22:19)
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Default Re: Hello - 07-05-2009, 04:42 AM

Dear Jimmy;

If you are going to pretend to be a Christian and mock His favorite forum, at least learn to post the correct Bible verse. Don't they teach you anything at 4chan Jimmy?

Quote:
Exodus 22:19 22:19 Whosoever lieth with a beast shall surely be put to death.
Are you trying to tell us something Jimmy? Are you that kind of "dog-lover" Jimmy?


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Hello - 07-05-2009, 04:51 AM

This is the correct Bible verse. I have the Brazilian Portuguese version of the King James bible.

I will not accept what you're trying to imply that I sleep with my dead dog. Who are you and why are you being hostile to me? May the holy Trinity forgive you.


Whoever sacrifices to any god, except the Lord alone, shall be doomed. (Exodus 22:19)
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Default Re: Hello - 07-05-2009, 05:00 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Of Lusitania View Post
I just googled "4chan meme", and I don't find my dog in there? This is the dog from All Dogs Go To Heaven movie that my friend Sister Lúcia sent me via e-mail.
I don't appreciate liars, James, but what I don't really appreciate is liars who keep on lying after they've been found out. Your avatar is "Advice Dog".

(WARNING: Highly unfunny attempts at humor at the above link. Enter at your own sanity.)

Your Bible verse is the wrong one, too, as Pastor Zeke pointed out.

We know you are being dishonest with us. You come here under a false identity with the intention to troll us...how do you expect us to treat you?



Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.

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Default Re: Hello - 07-05-2009, 02:18 PM

{I pray for clarification of this matter if I am incorrect or incomplete.}

I note in the thread above "All Dogs Go To Heaven" was mentioned. Is not this very concept blasphemous ??

Dogs do not have souls, can neither choose nor reject Christ, and therefore DO NOT go to heaven, right ??

That there may be dogs in heaven I cannot deny or confirm, but if there are, they may be as 'set dressings', created to illustrate parables or teachings, they would not be real, specific dogs such as we have on earth that have died and entered the Kingdom of Heaven.


Jud 1:15 To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are unGodly among them of all their unGodly deeds which they have unGodly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which unGodly sinners have spoken against him.
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Default Re: Hello - 07-05-2009, 02:58 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Metatron13 View Post
That there may be dogs in heaven I cannot deny or confirm, but if there are, they may be as 'set dressings', created to illustrate parables or teachings, they would not be real, specific dogs such as we have on earth that have died and entered the Kingdom of Heaven.
You mean like on that weird Twilight Zone® episode ?




Leviticus 26:27-29

27 And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me;
28 Then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.
29 And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat.
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Default Re: Hello - 07-05-2009, 04:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Of Lusitania View Post
Hello, brothers and sisters.

For many years I was a sinner. I had sex with countless women and played immoral video-games.
Then I took a Masters Degree in Mechanical and Aerospace Engineering... and it was good as nothing. I really found nothing that would justify my existence.

I want to be in touch again with Jesus.

Thanks you, and may God and His Holy Son Jesus bless you all.
You should thank da lawd ebry day of yo life cause he saved you from dat sinkin ship when da Nazi's torpedoed it. Stop sinnin and Praise Jeesus!


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Default Re: Hello - 07-05-2009, 04:42 PM

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Originally Posted by SayvedByTheLord View Post
You mean like on that weird Twilight Zone® episode ?

It was my impression all episodes of Twilight Zone were at the very least weird, if not far, far worse !!


Jud 1:15 To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are unGodly among them of all their unGodly deeds which they have unGodly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which unGodly sinners have spoken against him.
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SayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSayvedByTheLord has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Hello - 07-05-2009, 04:47 PM

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Originally Posted by Metatron13 View Post
It was my impression all episodes of Twilight Zone were at the very least weird, if not far, far worse !!
At the very least Brother.




Leviticus 26:27-29

27 And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me;
28 Then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.
29 And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat.
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