Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum A Christian Help Forum led by Sister Daisy Mae Johnson. Warning! Sometimes the Lord's advice is a hard pill to swallow. |
|
Forum Member, struggling for Salvation©
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 108
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Striving to be an obedient Christian girl
|
|
Jesus' Gun. -
02-08-2014, 10:18 PM
When Baby Jesus comes back to Earth to destroy all of the Godless Heathens do you think he'll use a gun to wipe their filth from the surface of the Earth? If so, what gun would Jesus use?
If you were fighting alongside Sweet Baby Jesus, what weapon, gun or not, would you use?
Thank you,
Miss Tanith
Ruth 1:16; Ruth 1:17 : 16 And Ruth said, Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God:
17 Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the Lord do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me.
|
|
Psychotheological Analyst Therapist
|
|
Posts: 9,051
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Surrounded by queers.
|
|
Re: Jesus' Gun. -
02-08-2014, 10:47 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss Tanith
When Baby Jesus comes back to Earth to destroy all of the Godless Heathens do you think he'll use a gun to wipe their filth from the surface of the Earth? If so, what gun would Jesus use?
If you were fighting alongside Sweet Baby Jesus, what weapon, gun or not, would you use?
Thank you,
Miss Tanith
|
He would not use a gun. He will use a mouth sword.
Revelation 19:15 And out of his mouth goeth a sharp sword, that with it he should smite the nations: and he shall rule them with a rod of iron: and he treadeth the winepress of the fierceness and wrath of Almighty God.
However, if I was standing by His side I would be using a Galil assault rifle. It may be the mainstay of those dirty joos but they sure do know a thing or two about killing.
YIC
1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.
Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
|
|
Forum Member, struggling for Salvation©
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 108
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Striving to be an obedient Christian girl
|
|
Re: Jesus' Gun. -
02-08-2014, 10:56 PM
Wow. Thanks, I knew about the mouth sword but I guess I must have forgotten. I'd use a bow and arrow with fire on the arrowhead.
Ruth 1:16; Ruth 1:17 : 16 And Ruth said, Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God:
17 Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the Lord do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me.
|
|
Gushing for Jesus
|
|
Posts: 23,731
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Jesus' Gun. -
02-08-2014, 10:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr Laurence Niles
He would not use a gun. He will use a mouth sword.
|
Amen! We often play Revelation here at the Etheldreda home. The children enjoy creating scenes from their brick toys. This scene references Revelation 19:21.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
|
|
Forum Member, struggling for Salvation©
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 108
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Striving to be an obedient Christian girl
|
|
Re: Jesus' Gun. -
02-08-2014, 11:08 PM
What weapon would you use if Jesus asked you to fight alongside him, Mrs Etheldreda?
Looks like my biblical knowledge is slipping. I'll double my bible study time and pray for forgiveness.
Ruth 1:16; Ruth 1:17 : 16 And Ruth said, Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God:
17 Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the Lord do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me.
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 533
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Love Child of Pastor Osborne
|
|
Re: Jesus' Gun. -
02-08-2014, 11:15 PM
I will brandish my scourge. And maybe some large rocks for some OT stone chucking.
I will let the wife and kids divide the more modern stuff up.
"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven." (Matthew 5:16)
"But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery." (Matthew 5:32)
Last edited by Freddy Osborne; 02-08-2014 at 11:16 PM.
Reason: Sp
|
|
Psychotheological Analyst Therapist
|
|
Posts: 9,051
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Surrounded by queers.
|
|
Re: Jesus' Gun. -
02-09-2014, 03:35 AM
An enduring image.
YIC
1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.
Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
|
|
Unsaved trash, teenaged fool
|
|
Posts: 389
Join Date: May 2012
Location: In bed with my fag boyfriend
|
|
Re: Jesus' Gun. -
02-09-2014, 03:38 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Frednekk
I will brandish my scourge. And maybe some large rocks for some OT stone chucking.
I will let the wife and kids divide the more modern stuff up.
|
I would use a bastard sword.
d10 damage as a martial weapon, only takes a feat and you are good to go.
You know it makes sense.
A whip for the horse, a bridle for the ass, and a rod for the fool's back. Proverbs 26:3
|
|
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 9,361
Join Date: Jan 2007
|
|
Re: Jesus' Gun. -
02-09-2014, 04:20 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr Laurence Niles
An enduring image.
YIC
|
Indeed Dr. Niles, one wonders what might have happened if Christians had been armed with 300 volt Lithium Ion quick change power pack chain saws back in the 7th Century. We might have been spared 1,400 years of mooselimb murderous slaughter and carnage.
Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 533
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Love Child of Pastor Osborne
|
|
Re: Jesus' Gun. -
02-09-2014, 04:43 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FreeFromBrains
I would use a bastard sword.
d10 damage as a martial weapon, only takes a feat and you are good to go.
You know it makes sense.
|
No, it doesn't. Are your feet more tannish or extremely brownish?
"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven." (Matthew 5:16)
"But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery." (Matthew 5:32)
|
|
Forum Member, struggling for Salvation©
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 108
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Striving to be an obedient Christian girl
|
|
Re: Jesus' Gun. -
02-11-2014, 04:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FreeFromBrains
I would use a bastard sword.
d10 damage as a martial weapon, only takes a feat and you are good to go.
You know it makes sense.
|
Why are you hijacking my thread with swears and lies? You're upsetting me. You're probably upsetting sweet baby Jesus too. Is there something not quite right in your head?
What are you using card game slang for? I walked past a card game once, some kids were playing it on the wall to my front garden. It had a perverted name... Ah, that's right. 'Peek-a-man' I think. From what I heard, it involves homers who do magic. I think, but I'm not sure, that they keep their familiars in 'balls'- a reference to male private parts, probably- and use them to cast spells to attack other people's familiars. It was a horrific thing to witness- children so young. I felt powerless. Then I remembered my hose pipe was just there, and I didn't want the neighbor kids thinking I condoned homersexual games and activities right outside my gate, so I sprayed them with my hose pipe until they ran away. I ruined those corruption cards.
Has anyone else noticed children playing this 'Peek-a-man' game? I think it's really dangerous. I'd hate it to catch on, and I hope it's not too widespread. If it's just my area we can probably nip it in the bud.
Anyway, as I was saying. Please swear elsewhere. I don't want to see your profanities, I'm very upset that you didn't consider how people might feel. You're coming across as filth. I'm sure you didn't mean to, but please. Watch your words.
Ruth 1:16; Ruth 1:17 : 16 And Ruth said, Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God:
17 Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the Lord do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me.
|
Thread Tools |
|
Display Modes |
Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved
|