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Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians) At LBC, we will cure your perversion of choice (even if we have to stone you).

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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 01-29-2011, 11:49 PM

Ha, this is incredible! My dear fellow, you sound almost like a caricature of a fundamentalist Christian. I sincerely hope this is a joke. If not, well, I will say that the extent of your immense ignorance is matched only by your own vanity.
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 01-30-2011, 12:39 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JUAN GARCIA View Post
Ha, this is incredible! My dear fellow, you sound almost like a caricature of a fundamentalist Christian. I sincerely hope this is a joke. If not, well, I will say that the extent of your immense ignorance is matched only by your own vanity.
Dear friend:

Why would we joke about this? Protecting ourselves from homosexuality is no laughing matter.


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 01-30-2011, 03:56 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Isaac Peters View Post
The Kenyan usurper, Hitlery Klingon, and the Whiskeypalian institution are lining up to kiss the jackboots of the gaystapo, but at least the Ugandan clerics aren't caving in to the sodomite agenda of special privileges.

False Christian "news" source:
Why am I not surprised that the false Christian degenerate Episcoplians are siding with the radical homersexural lobby? The Episcopalian Religion is straight out of the pits of hell.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-03-2011, 10:37 PM

The joke is when someone puts a trademark next to his/her handle and wants to allege that homosexuality is a threat. That's almost as funny as threatening someone with a place which has no demonstrable existence, any more than god, heaven, soul or spirit do.
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-03-2011, 11:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by an obviously confused person View Post
The joke is when someone puts a trademark next to his/her handle and wants to allege that homosexuality is a threat. That's almost as funny as threatening someone with a place which has no demonstrable existence, any more than god, heaven, soul or spirit do.
God, Heaven, hell, soul, and spirit all exist; their existence is demonstrated through the Bible.
Posted via JesOS™ Mobile


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-04-2011, 11:44 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JUAN GARCIA View Post
The joke is when someone puts a trademark next to his/her handle and wants to allege that homosexuality is a threat. That's almost as funny as threatening someone with a place which has no demonstrable existence, any more than god, heaven, soul or spirit do.
You keep on thinking that God and Hell don't exist there you dirty heathen and I can assure you that you will never see the first and spent eternity in the second with the Devil....enjoy your fate sinner


If you don't believe it then go read your bible - you DON"T have a bible??? Then prepare for eternal damnation sinner.
“If ye love me, keep my commandments.” – John 14:15
"Vengeance Is Mine, I Will Repay Sayeth The Lord" - Romans 12:19
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-04-2011, 03:00 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JUAN GARCIA View Post
Ha, this is incredible! My dear fellow, you sound almost like a caricature of a fundamentalist Christian. I sincerely hope this is a joke. If not, well, I will say that the extent of your immense ignorance is matched only by your own vanity.
People actually believe that stuff (as demonstrated in the OP) and can back it up with their big book of fairy tales.
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-04-2011, 03:23 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Oliver Brendan Hayve View Post
People actually believe that stuff (as demonstrated in the OP) and can back it up with their big book of fairy tales.
SHAME upon you Godmocker! The Holy Bible has guided human behavior for thousands of years. I am pleased to see that at least one African country has learned to read it.

You, dear Oliver, apparently have not.


"Come Unto Me. Put forth thine hand now, and touch all that he hath." (Matthew 19:14, Job 1:11).
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-04-2011, 03:30 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ExGay Alex View Post
SHAME upon you Godmocker! The Holy Bible has guided human behavior for thousands of years. I am pleased to see that at least one African country has learned to read it.

You, dear Oliver, apparently have not.
Careful Alex - Oliver there is still a raging Homer and might think you are trying to pick him up by calling him "dear".

Best to avoid all contact with the rampaging gay boys (unless punching them to beat the word of the Lord into them). GLORY!!


If you don't believe it then go read your bible - you DON"T have a bible??? Then prepare for eternal damnation sinner.
“If ye love me, keep my commandments.” – John 14:15
"Vengeance Is Mine, I Will Repay Sayeth The Lord" - Romans 12:19
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-04-2011, 05:21 PM

Here's a video of Unganda's Christians. The monkey-man may have a good point there, but the way he professionally demonstrates the filthy homersexual movements make me question what he truely believes about faggots. It almost looks like he participated in faggot aids sex quite a few times to see how they do it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJZHvHb8LBE


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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-04-2011, 06:30 PM

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Originally Posted by Brother Scott View Post
Very well said. But how am I to know whether or not satan could have caused the unlean homer blood to splash upon a man who was doing God's Holy work?
God is so wise that He has made it so that when a homer's blood is spilled during a beating, this only produces antibodies to protect you in the event of homersexural rape. So it is safe to beat homers. I know this because I have done it myself (note my award for it).


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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-04-2011, 07:00 PM

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God is so wise that He has made it so that when a homer's blood is spilled during a beating, this only produces antibodies to protect you in the event of homersexural rape. So it is safe to beat homers. I know this because I have done it myself (note my award for it).
Good Christian information Brother Billy Bob. I myself have beaten several homers to a bloody weeping mess (they always cry like girls when you punch them don't they?) so there should be nothing to stop other good True Christian men giving these queers a stiff seeing to.


If you don't believe it then go read your bible - you DON"T have a bible??? Then prepare for eternal damnation sinner.
“If ye love me, keep my commandments.” – John 14:15
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-06-2011, 05:32 PM

If you think a homer you want to beat up has very serious aids, you can always wear gloves. They don't need to be thick, just from a strong material (like leather) to prevent the aids from going through. Or you can just kick them in the face. You're protected by your shoes and they will still be bleeding like a road kill!


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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-28-2011, 06:12 AM

It's unfortunate that this man was so stubborn to find Jesus that somebody was forced to give him a fatal pounding to cure him of his sins! That being said, I'm an optimist, so I hope this homosexual finally realized his transgressions and found Jesus as he was being bludgeoned to death. It's possible!
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-28-2011, 06:15 AM

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Originally Posted by yessamassa View Post
It's unfortunate that this man was so stubborn to find Jesus that somebody was forced to give him a fatal pounding to cure him of his sins! That being said, I'm an optimist, so I hope this homosexual finally realized his transgressions and found Jesus as he was being bludgeoned to death. It's possible!
Say, you know a lot of 3 dollar words for a junglebunny. Did your mammy send you to school?


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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miss Pauletta miss Pauletta is offline
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-28-2011, 07:18 AM

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Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Say, you know a lot of 3 dollar words for a junglebunny. Did your mammy send you to school?
I dropped out of the sixth grade, actually! I use spell check on words that get a red underline when I finish typing them (almost all of them do), and I use thesaurus.com to elevate my vocabulary above the typical damnable ebonics so prevalent with my kind.

I could actually show you what a piece of my my non-tool-assisted writing looks like, but I fear you would not want the task of deciphering something of such base ignorance, and I do not want to sully this forum of the Lord with something that isn't up to His grammatical standard!
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Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson is offline
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-28-2011, 07:42 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by yessamassa View Post
I dropped out of the sixth grade, actually! I use spell check on words that get a red underline when I finish typing them (almost all of them do), and I use thesaurus.com to elevate my vocabulary above the typical damnable ebonics so prevalent with my kind.

I could actually show you what a piece of my my non-tool-assisted writing looks like, but I fear you would not want the task of deciphering something of such base ignorance, and I do not want to sully this forum of the Lord with something that isn't up to His grammatical standard!
Well now, that is impressive! So clean and well spoken. You could almost be high yellow with talk like that.

I like you, boy or was it girl?
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miss Pauletta miss Pauletta is offline
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Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-28-2011, 07:45 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson View Post
Well now, that is impressive! So clean and well spoken. You could almost be high yellow with talk like that.

I like you, boy or was it girl?
Girl, sir. Not something I'm proud of, but it's God's chosen path for me, and I do not question his perfect will.
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Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson is offline
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Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Uganda does things God's way. Shout glory! - 02-28-2011, 07:55 AM

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Originally Posted by yessamassa View Post
Girl, sir. Not something I'm proud of, but it's God's chosen path for me, and I do not question his perfect will.
That's okay. Jesus wants us to save even you lesser people.

John 4:9-10 Then saith the woman of Samaria unto him, How is it that thou, being a Jew, askest drink of me, which am a woman of Samaria? for the Jews have no dealings with the Samaritans.
Jesus answered and said unto her, If thou knewest the gift of God, and who it is that saith to thee, Give me to drink; thou wouldest have asked of him, and he would have given thee living water.
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