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Default A slow laying of hands - 10-17-2006, 05:36 AM

Lay hands suddenly on no man, neither be partaker of other men's sins: keep thyself pure. (1 Timothy 5:22)

This verse appears to be the driving force behind the conversion of many a wiccan to True Christianity ... indeed, young MoonFlower had to undergo a long and arduous healing process, draining the strength of many a True Christian™ man; at the time it was a complete success, judging by the shouts of "Glory!" and, "sweet, sweeeet JESUS!" that echoed throughout Freehold. PRAISE.

But I wonder if 1 Timothy 5:22 is also a warning regarding men-on-men healing ministries; do not rush to lay hands upon your Brother - take your time, think it through first - is he really in need, or is there something more sinister going on here?

Far be it from me to give advice to True Christian™ men, but I would recommend that if your Brother asks for a hands-on healing of his pulled groin muscle, report him immediately to the Church Elders.


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Default Re: A slow laying of hands - 10-17-2006, 06:22 AM

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Originally Posted by Mrs. Rogers View Post
if your Brother asks for a hands-on healing of his pulled groin muscle, report him immediately to the Church Elders.
So the Landover Church Elders can lay their hands instead?
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Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mrs. Rogers will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A slow laying of hands - 10-17-2006, 06:42 AM

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Originally Posted by Fish View Post
So the Landover Church Elders can lay their hands instead?
Only in your disgusting altar boy-meets-Pope dreams, Fish bait.

The Church Elders will determine whether or not the request for a laying of manly hands is innocent, or a furtive attempt at a little homer-erotic action. Usually it is Bobby Joe who bravely volunteers to assess the situation; when it comes to men's health, he is something of a lay physician, you see.


True Christians are Perfect!

Signs that you belong to a FALSE Christian Church.

Persecution You Have Endured for CHRIST: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger in Christ.

For True Christians™ only: please send me Project Habakkuk updates at gertruderogers@landoverbaptist.net. Thank you.
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