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  • #1

    Jesus Takes The Wheel, Motorcyclists Almost Meets His Maker!

    Anthony Oliveri, a motorcyclist, was riding through Fort Wayne, Indiana when Jesus showed him his tender love and mercy. Jesus told Pridona Hill, the driver of the car that suddenly swerved into his lane, to let Him take the wheel, literally. Being a devout True Christian™ lady, Hill trusted Jesus and let Him indeed, take the wheel. That's when Jesus ran over Oliveri’s bike, and Oliveri himself.

    “When he came into the emergency room, the bruise on the top of his back was shaped like a heart. When we got him up to his room, his bruise on his back, and even now, is shaped like angel wings. Even the nurses said that. His guardian angel was watching over him, and she gave him her wings. Then she went on vacation, because he’s put her through the wringer,” Oliveri’s fiance told Wane.com.
    Praise Jesus! Oliveri's bruises show God's Presence and Sovereignty to the world!

    \0/



    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

    Tags: jesus take the wheel
  • #2
    Re: Jesus Takes The Wheel, Motorcyclists Almost Meets His Maker!

    I think angels are too big to put through wringers. Even the family-sized ones (wringers, I mean, not angels) that are advertised for sale in 21st Century Christian Woman magazine:



    Not that I personally read women's magazines, of course. That would be gay, which totally isn't me.
    The Christian Right: The Only Right Way to Be a Christian!

    Comment

    • #3
      Re: Jesus Takes The Wheel, Motorcyclists Almost Meets His Maker!

      In everything that happens, Jesus blesses us. No matter how much that blessing hurts.

      2 Corinthians 12:10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.
      Proverbs 27:15 A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.

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      • #4
        Re: Jesus Takes The Wheel, Motorcyclists Almost Meets His Maker!

        It seems like everyone is just a little bit closer to Christ now. When we can't understand His ways, we may yet rejoice in His promises. Praise!

        Isaiah 55:9
        For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

        I Corinthians 3:19
        For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, He taketh the wise in their own craftiness.
        II Thessalonians 1:7-9
        And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels,
        In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ:
        Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power
        The man who is being progressively sanctified will inescapably sanctify his home, school, politics, economics, science, and all things else by understanding and interpreting all things in terms of the Word of God and by bringing all things under the Dominion of Christ the King. -R.J. Rushdoony

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        • #5
          Re: Jesus Takes The Wheel, Motorcyclists Almost Meets His Maker!

          I practice "Jesus Take the Wheel" daily on my RV. There is no greater act of Faith. My RV is up on blocks and hasn't been driven for years but I take that as Jesus telling me I am exactly where I'm supposed to be.
          Leviticus 13:40 And the man whose hair is fallen off his head, he is bald; yet is he clean.

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          • #6
            Re: Jesus Takes The Wheel, Motorcyclists Almost Meets His Maker!

            If there are any "atheists" reading this article: CHECKMATE!!! Jesus is Real and I'm one of the Saved!!! Why aren't you?!?!?
            Matthew 7:20 Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.

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            • #7
              Re: Jesus Takes The Wheel, Motorcyclists Almost Meets His Maker!

              ^^^Don't know that I would call that checkmate.

              Sounds like the biker was lucky.

              Comment

              • #8
                Re: Jesus Takes The Wheel, Motorcyclists Almost Meets His Maker!

                Originally posted by Phalanx View Post
                ^^^Don't know that I would call that checkmate.

                Sounds like the biker was lucky.
                That hussy demoness "Fortuna" had nothing to do with this, friend. The biker wasn't "lucky," he was blessed! Why, how else do you think angel shaped wings could just have "happened" to have appeared on his back where the car that Jesus was driving ran over him?
                Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

                Comment

                • #9
                  Re: Jesus Takes The Wheel, Motorcyclists Almost Meets His Maker!

                  Originally posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
                  That hussy demoness "Fortuna" had nothing to do with this, friend. The biker wasn't "lucky," he was blessed! Why, how else do you think angel shaped wings could just have "happened" to have appeared on his back where the car that Jesus was driving ran over him?
                  Sister Mary, you are so smart and wise for a woman! It is inspiring the way you put your love for Jesus before all else, including your personal appearance. The way your hair lies so limp and lifeless against your head is testimony to your Righteousness!

                  Why, indeed, would there be wing-shaped marks on this man's back unless the Lord intended for him to go forth into the world and Witness to others? May he have a long life ahead of him so he can speak to as many high school children in as many gymnasiums as possible. PRAISE HIM!
                  Let Jesus Christ Wash You Clean
                  in 2016

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                  • #10
                    Re: Jesus Takes The Wheel, Motorcyclists Almost Meets His Maker!

                    Originally posted by VictoryOS View Post
                    Sister Mary, you are so smart and wise for a woman! It is inspiring the way you put your love for Jesus before all else, including your personal appearance. The way your hair lies so limp and lifeless against your head is testimony to your Righteousness!

                    Why, indeed, would there be wing-shaped marks on this man's back unless the Lord intended for him to go forth into the world and Witness to others? May he have a long life ahead of him so he can speak to as many high school children in as many gymnasiums as possible. PRAISE HIM!
                    You're confused about the hair, dear. You see, modern fashion favors a healthy, natural sheen. I am grateful the Good Lord has blessed me with this abundantly and take no pride in my appearance. It is a gift. Perhaps you'd like to look at the fashion magazines from this decade to see what I mean. You can find them in the pharmacy, to the right of the scotch you pick up as "cough medicine."

                    I do agree with you about the blessings Mr. Oliveri received from our Sweet Redeemer Himself. Nothing says we will teach the Law unto our children, talking about them when they sit at home and when they walk along the road, when they lie down and when they get up like creating a captive school audience before lunchtime (Deuteronomy 11:19).

                    Glory!
                    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

                    Comment

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