WEDDING BELLS! - Christian Wedding Forum A seasonal forum hosted by cyber Bridesmaids, Daisy Mae Johnson, Sister Mary Etheldreda and Sister Talitha . Groomly advice is also offered from Best Man, Pastor Zeke! |
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Spiritual Mother of LBC
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,341
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-17-2008, 04:09 PM
With high wedding season coming up, it is important to stay on the right rutting path. Warning! IF IT ISN'T A LANDOVER BAPTIST WEDDING IT IS A FALSE CHRISTIAN WEDDING AND IS DOOMED TO FAIL!
On a better note, I am excited to introduce Sisters Thumper and Sue Vera as your Cyber Bridesmaids and Brother Zeke as every man's Best Man! Weddings are a nervous time for many folks, so let GOD's favorite church lead you down the right path.
Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.
Last edited by Glendora Christianson; 05-17-2008 at 04:23 PM.
Reason: picture removed due to homosexual content (sorry Jesus)
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-17-2008, 04:12 PM
JESUS, Mother Glynndie, I am so HERE!!!!!
Umm - hasn't the news reached Landover yet about.... Rock Hudson?
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Spiritual Mother of LBC
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,341
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, IA
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-17-2008, 04:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SUV
JESUS, Mother Glynndie, I am so HERE!!!!!
Umm - hasn't the news reached Landover yet about.... Rock Hudson?
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OH! Dear Lord! I can't believe I made that mistake! I guess its a sign that the World really does need our help? I will find a suitable Christian wedding picture and replace it.
Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-17-2008, 04:21 PM
Ah yes, so the news is out: A handsome, dashing gentleMan like Mr Rock just doesn't seem to want to be Married
Maybe if I learn to Bake Snickerdoodles, tho?
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-17-2008, 05:30 PM
GLORY!!!
I'm soooo excited Sisters!! Just imagine all the beautiful dresses we will get to wear!
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-17-2008, 05:34 PM
Here I am! Here I be! Here is your WEDDING BELLE!!!!!!!!!!
Any takers?
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-17-2008, 09:23 PM
I'm soooooo excited!
I LOVE anything WEDDING!!! Here is a vid I took last year at my cousin Velma's wedding.
I was baffled that her son was born 8 months early and still weighed 6 1/2 lbs. See!! JESUS really does provide miracles for his Chosen.
GLORY!!!!!
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-18-2008, 04:02 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Glendora Christianson
With high wedding season coming up, it is important to stay on the right rutting path. Warning! IF IT ISN'T A LANDOVER BAPTIST WEDDING IT IS A FALSE CHRISTIAN WEDDING AND IS DOOMED TO FAIL!
On a better note, I am excited to introduce Sisters Thumper and Sue Vera as your Cyber Bridesmaids and Brother Zeke as every man's Best Man! Weddings are a nervous time for many folks, so let GOD's favorite church lead you down the right path.
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He sure looks like Nixon to me?????
Either way in HELL and sucking on Satan's something or other.
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LBU Professor and Biblical Wordsmith Extraordinaire President of the Ex-Negro Academy Alumni Association Freehold Best Tan Award winner, 10 yrs running
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Posts: 2,048
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Chateau Lebeau (Freehold, Iowa)
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-19-2008, 01:33 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde
I'm soooooo excited!
I LOVE anything WEDDING!!! Here is a vid I took last year at my cousin Velma's wedding.
I was baffled that her son was born 8 months early and still weighed 6 1/2 lbs. See!! JESUS really does provide miracles for his Chosen.
GLORY!!!!!
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How lovely Sister Thumper.
If any of you ladies plan on going to any of your helps' weddings or allowing them to attend in of yours, god forbid, be warned:
http://www.toxicjunction.com/get.asp?i=V2285
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 691
Join Date: May 2008
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-19-2008, 11:33 PM
I am planning for my wedding. Here are my choices of what kinds of wedding I am wanted : Goth, Native American (since I am 35 % Native), and a Wiccan wedding. However my fiancee wants a traditional Christain wedding. I do not want that. So we are choosing to go with his idea or a justice of the peace wedding.
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Senior Pastor VP of Evangelical Outreach On FIRE for Jesus
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-19-2008, 11:35 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BurningWolfspit1989
However my fiancee wants a traditional Christain wedding.
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Why does he want that? Is he a Christian?
Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.
✝ This is a Christian community and we worship GOD of the Holy bible, the only Living GOD. We worship Jesus Christ, Son of GOD and Savior. Anything else is absurd. ✝
Trump / Arpaio 2016 -- The Government We Deserve
#ChristianLivesMatter
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Confirmed Enemy of God
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To Paster Billy about Wedding Bells -
05-20-2008, 12:20 AM
Paster Billy's Question: Why does he want that? Is he a Christian?
My answer: Well technically he is Protestant.
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Senior Pastor VP of Evangelical Outreach On FIRE for Jesus
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Re: To Paster Billy about Wedding Bells -
05-20-2008, 12:41 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by DogSpit1989
Well technically he is Protestant.
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OK, so he's one of those folks who calls himself a Christian but isn't really saved. In that case, a traditional Christian wedding is probably a bad idea. God actually prefers cold atheists over lukewarm Christians, and a traditional Christian wedding between an lukewarm Christian and a Wiccan would just be mockery.
Why don't y'all just do one of those pagan knot-tying ceremonies? Maybe sometime in the future after you both get saved, you can renew your vows in a real wedding.
Pastor Billy-Reuben
Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.
✝ This is a Christian community and we worship GOD of the Holy bible, the only Living GOD. We worship Jesus Christ, Son of GOD and Savior. Anything else is absurd. ✝
Trump / Arpaio 2016 -- The Government We Deserve
#ChristianLivesMatter
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SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-20-2008, 12:47 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by DogSpit1989
I am planning for my wedding. Here are my choices of what kinds of wedding I am wanted : Goth, Native American (since I am 35 % Native), and a Wiccan wedding. However my fiancee wants a traditional Christain wedding. I do not want that. So we are choosing to go with his idea or a justice of the peace wedding.
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You could do what we did. We wrote our own wedding ritual, combining elements of my husband's religious traditions and mine, and had a JP make it legal.
Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
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Confirmed Enemy of God
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-20-2008, 12:53 AM
That sounds cool. I do not think he would go for that though. He is stubborn when it comes to this issue.
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Senior Pastor VP of Evangelical Outreach On FIRE for Jesus
True Christian™
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-20-2008, 01:14 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by DogSpit1989
That sounds cool. I do not think he would go for that though. He is stubborn when it comes to this issue.
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You could point out to him that there's no point in a Christian wedding seeing as how he isn't a real Christian. If he were, he'd care about what 2 Corinthians 6:15-17 says about Christians marrying non-Christians.
Personally, I'd be surprised if you can find a Christian minister willing to marry a lukewarm Christian to a Wiccan. If you came to my office asking me to perform the ceremony, I'd send you down to the justice of the peace.
Pastor Billy-Reuben
Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.
✝ This is a Christian community and we worship GOD of the Holy bible, the only Living GOD. We worship Jesus Christ, Son of GOD and Savior. Anything else is absurd. ✝
Trump / Arpaio 2016 -- The Government We Deserve
#ChristianLivesMatter
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Unruly True Christian™ Maverick
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-20-2008, 01:47 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by DogSpit1989
That sounds cool. I do not think he would go for that though. He is stubborn when it comes to this issue.
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You ARE kidding, right? Please tell me you are joking. You're serious? Really? really? really?
What kinda of man gives a flying f*ck about the wedding? It's the chick that is supposed to have dreamed about it and planned it out since her 5th birthday, not the god damned man!!! What a complete and total gaywad.
It's like I have been saying all along...
ALL GOTHS ARE FAGS!!!!
Your fiancée has probably packed more fudge with nuts than Hershey's Almond. And I doubt his sweet tooth is going to rot and fall out anytime soon. By the time it does he'll have already been diagnosed with AIDS, you'll have already contracted it, and you will be on your deathbed following right behind him to the
FRES F HELL . Do you really want to risk getting some VD from that gay bastard?
Besides, Nehemiah 13:25-27 says, "And I contended with them, and cursed them, and smote certain of them, and plucked off their hair, and made them swear by God, saying, Ye shall not give your daughters unto their sons, nor take their daughters unto your sons, or for yourselves. Did not Solomon king of Israel sin by these things? yet among many nations was there no king like him, who was beloved of his God, and God made him king over all Israel: nevertheless even him did outlandish women cause to sin. Shall we then hearken unto you to do all this great evil, to transgress against our God in marrying strange wives?"
If you wiccans aren't strange, I don't know what is. No Genuine Christian would ever marry you.
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Honorary True Christian™ Sweet Placid Sister
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-20-2008, 02:13 AM
I thought you were banned, Clarabelle.
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Confirmed Enemy of God
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-20-2008, 02:13 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vayhr of the Warhost
You ARE kidding, right? Please tell me you are joking. You're serious? Really? really? really?
What kinda of man gives a flying f*ck about the wedding? It's the chick that is supposed to have dreamed about it and planned it out since her 5th birthday, not the god damned man!!! What a complete and total gaywad.
It's like I have been saying all along...
ALL GOTHS ARE FAGS!!!!
Your fiancée has probably packed more fudge with nuts than Hershey's Almond. And I doubt his sweet tooth is going to rot and fall out anytime soon. By the time it does he'll have already been diagnosed with AIDS, you'll have already contracted it, and you will be on your deathbed following right behind him to the
FRES F HELL . Do you really want to risk getting some VD from that gay bastard?
Besides, Nehemiah 13:25-27 says, "And I contended with them, and cursed them, and smote certain of them, and plucked off their hair, and made them swear by God, saying, Ye shall not give your daughters unto their sons, nor take their daughters unto your sons, or for yourselves. Did not Solomon king of Israel sin by these things? yet among many nations was there no king like him, who was beloved of his God, and God made him king over all Israel: nevertheless even him did outlandish women cause to sin. Shall we then hearken unto you to do all this great evil, to transgress against our God in marrying strange wives?"
If you wiccans aren't strange, I don't know what is. No Genuine Christian would ever marry you.
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Well he is a real man and cares about it. He is not Goth. He is actually what you people would call a normal person and dresses normal. Therefore he is not a homosexual. He wants me to be Christian, but he knows that he cannot change of who I am and leaves me alone about it. So him and I do not discuss religion. I am already happy with the man am marrying him. I am ready to marry him and start a family.
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Confirmed Enemy of God
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Posts: 691
Join Date: May 2008
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Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells! -
05-20-2008, 02:17 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben
You could point out to him that there's no point in a Christian wedding seeing as how he isn't a real Christian. If he were, he'd care about what 2 Corinthians 6:15-17 says about Christians marrying non-Christians.
Personally, I'd be surprised if you can find a Christian minister willing to marry a lukewarm Christian to a Wiccan. If you came to my office asking me to perform the ceremony, I'd send you down to the justice of the peace.
Pastor Billy-Reuben
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He is already stuck on his decision and I cannot change his mind. I do not want to be married by the justice of the peace. I rather have a wedding and if he wants a Christian wedding I guess he will have his way.
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