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Capt. Aaron Portway's Avatar
Capt. Aaron Portway Capt. Aaron Portway is offline
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Default Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 04:50 AM
I am only a recently accepted member of God's Favorite Forum™, but I am here to ask you all to pray for the banning of Captain Asshat.

His blasphemous ways are hard enough to bear, but the way I see it, he offends our Lord more with the boringness of his posts. He wastes Godly bandwidth just as he wastes the time of True Christians™, members, and Administrators alike who click on threads where he has posted.

If I am overstepping my position as a recently accepted member, I am sorry. If Captain Asshat is reading this, please understand, this is nothing personal. I just can't bear to read another of your awful, blasphemous, intentionally misspelled boring posts.



Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
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Captain_Asshat Captain_Asshat is offline
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Captain_Asshat is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Captain_Asshat is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 07:34 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aaron Portway View Post
I am only a recently accepted member of God's Favorite Forum™, but I am here to ask you all to pray for the banning of Captain Asshat.

His blasphemous ways are hard enough to bear
Huh? Blasphemous?? WTF!

Hey assmunch, I'm a True Chrisrtian just lik you!!!

Yea, I kno I been banned off here, like, twice before. But Pastor Zeekiel let me back on here cause I promised I changed this time.

Look, I even made him cry...



Hey, I not even got Infaction Points like I done got las time they ban me.

An ma thread on the Olsen twins got, lik, over 100 replies cause they so Godly!! Even my thead on time travel an thread on Superman wer real popular too ....

.... I don kno why they had ta ban me at all??

Anyways knucklehead, am here to show I changed, an a think am doing a pretty darn good job so far!
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Default Re: Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 10:23 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aaron Portway View Post
I am only a recently accepted member of God's Favorite Forum™, but I am here to ask you all to pray for the banning of Captain Asshat.

His blasphemous ways are hard enough to bear, but the way I see it, he offends our Lord more with the boringness of his posts. He wastes Godly bandwidth just as he wastes the time of True Christians™, members, and Administrators alike who click on threads where he has posted.

If I am overstepping my position as a recently accepted member, I am sorry. If Captain Asshat is reading this, please understand, this is nothing personal. I just can't bear to read another of your awful, blasphemous, intentionally misspelled boring posts.
Just what I was thinking, Mr. Portway!
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Default Re: Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 12:42 PM
Brother Portway, you are blessed that you have not had to endure previous incarnations (used figuratively because that’s boodist rubbish) of Capt Asshat.

I look upon him (her?) as a parable of what might befall any of us should we take our eye off the ball and backslide. To the Unsaved Trash he doubtless serves the purpose of allowing them to identify with him; to them it is comforting that others share their lack of intellect.

On the other hand, Capt Asshat may be a Godly Gift to encourage us to look into our souls to see that we are complying with every Godly Word. You may wish to look upon him as a test...




“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Default Re: Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 04:02 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aaron Portway View Post
I am only a recently accepted member of God's Favorite Forum™, but I am here to ask you all to pray for the banning of Captain Asshat.

His blasphemous ways are hard enough to bear, but the way I see it, he offends our Lord more with the boringness of his posts. He wastes Godly bandwidth just as he wastes the time of True Christians™, members, and Administrators alike who click on threads where he has posted.

If I am overstepping my position as a recently accepted member, I am sorry. If Captain Asshat is reading this, please understand, this is nothing personal. I just can't bear to read another of your awful, blasphemous, intentionally misspelled boring posts.
I appreciate your zeal, Brother Aaron, but I am content to allow the senior pastors deal with people as they see fit. Some get banned, some are quarantined, and others are allowed to stay in the hope that some day they may reform. However, you can affect the status of those who offend you (or those whom you especially like) by adding to, or subtracting from, their reputations.

Yours in Christ,

BBS
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Default Re: Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 04:28 PM
Last evening I thought he was a pain but look what we get today!

May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Capt. Aaron Portway's Avatar
Capt. Aaron Portway Capt. Aaron Portway is offline
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Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 05:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billybob Sunday View Post
I appreciate your zeal, Brother Aaron, but I am content to allow the senior pastors deal with people as they see fit. Some get banned, some are quarantined, and others are allowed to stay in the hope that some day they may reform. However, you can affect the status of those who offend you (or those whom you especially like) by adding to, or subtracting from, their reputations.

Yours in Christ,

BBS
I understand Brother Billy Bob, he just gets my goat sometimes! Nothing annoys me more than when someone who is truely stupid tries to act like they are stupider! It just doesn't work!



Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
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Captain_Asshat Captain_Asshat is offline
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Captain_Asshat is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Captain_Asshat is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 10:18 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King View Post
Last evening I thought he was a pain but look what we get today!
Thanks Brother Noober! At leas some people on here see am tryin' to turn over new leaves! Her's some of those pirate smellies for ya!!! Aaaarrrrrrr!!!

I hope ya all prey for me in ma new thread 'Pleas pray that Captain Asshat get prompoted to True Christain"

Praise Jeeeeesssuuuuss! Aaaaaaarrrrrr!




JOIN THE CHURCH OF PIRATE JESUS! PRAISE THE LORD, AND SHIVER ME TIMBERS.... AAAAARRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
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Default Re: Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 10:35 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Asshat View Post


give me break okay making joke with pastor ezekil avatar is total my thing (except when I am do it is clever). I am hire team of lawyer and sue you for infringe of copyright. I am suggest you are hire own team of lawyer and also do everyone favor and hire team of comedy writer okay.
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Default Re: Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 10:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hitoshi View Post
give me break okay making joke with pastor ezekil avatar is total my thing (except when I am do it is clever). I am hire team of lawyer and sue you for infringe of copyright. I am suggest you are hire own team of lawyer and also do everyone favor and hire team of comedy writer okay.
The end times are near. I agree with hispokey for once!

Matthew:
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5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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Default Re: Must we endure Mr. Asshat? - 09-11-2008, 10:49 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aaron Portway View Post
I just can't bear to read another of your awful, blasphemous, intentionally misspelled boring posts.
Brother A,

I don't believe Chuckle-head 'intentionally' misspells his posts. I just think ALL Goths are THAT retarded!

He's a walking advertisment for where the heavy-metal 'death-style' can lead. No life, no hope, no prospects, no future. Still living in his own Mother's basement when he's in his 30's. It's quite pathetic!
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