[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

You're talking about two mythological people here, a father and a son.

YOU are about to become a mythological person in the manner of LOT's wife if you keep up that sassy tone in this GODLY forum, MISSY!

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Originally Posted by Prune Danish

Nonsense. This is what "bastard" means:

1) bastard, child of incest, illegitimate child
a) bastard
b) mixed population (fig.)
c) born of a Jewish father and a heathen mother or visa versa

And doesn't that prove my point?
Look, just pointing out some simple things here.
Was Jesus Joseph's son? No. I'll pretend for a moment the bible is real. Jesus was 'god's son' was Mary married to god? No, she wasn't, she was to be married to Joseph.
Therefore, he becomes illegitimate.

Being a bastard has nothing to do with marriage and everything to do with miscegenation - the sin of crossing bloodlines with Godless races.

If a GODLY woman should conceive a child with, say, a Negro, then after 10 generations the child will only be 1/1024 Negro . So God is saying that even if you're only 99.91% white, He'll let you in anyway. That's how much God loves His children.

But what I'm trying to say here is why condemn the rest of humankind for an action which was used to 'beget the savior' supposedly?
Why do something, then damn it if anyone else does? How is that leading an example?

Originally Posted by Pastor Al

YOU are about to become a mythological person in the manner of LOT's wife if you keep up that sassy tone in this GODLY forum, MISSY!

I'm only pointing out very simple things using simple logic. Maybe you should try it sometime, Pastor?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

And doesn't that prove my point?

NO!


Look, just pointing out some simple things here.
Was Jesus Joseph's son? No.

OF COURSE HE WAS JOSEPH'S SON! He simply wasn't sired by Joseph.

I'll pretend for a moment the bible is real. Jesus was 'god's son' was Mary married to god? No, she wasn't, she was to be married to Joseph. Therefore, he becomes illegitimate.

Please keep your illogical nonsense to yourself. The Holy Spirit 'Came upon" Mary, and Joseph was told to like it or else!

But what I'm trying to say here is why condemn the rest of humankind for an action which was used to 'beget the savior' supposedly? Why do something, then damn it if anyone else does? How is that leading an example?

Because of one simple little fact. Women are damned by GOD and everything they do is wrong unless their husband or father tells them to do it. If it is still wrong, it is the woman's fault.

I'm only pointing out very simple things using simple logic. Maybe you should try it sometime, Pastor?

Do you know why you get migraines, MISSY? I'll tell you! Because you are trying to think! GOD doesn't want women to think, but merely to bake little soldiers for JESUS.

[Mrs. Rogers]

Originally Posted by SalvationSeeker

Mary was a virgin when she gave birth to Jesus.

Amen. Joseph waited until Mary had given birth before consumating the marriage - thereby sparing the Holy Fetus an undignified prodding:

(Matthew 1:23-25)
Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call his name Emmanuel, which being interpreted is, God with us.
Then Joseph being raised from sleep did as the angel of the Lord had bidden him, and took unto him his wife:
And knew her not till she had brought forth her firstborn son: and he called his name JESUS.

Which was, of course, the righteous thing to do, seeing as sex should only be for the purposes of procreation; if one's wife is with child, there should be NO grubbing about between the sheets for the duration of the pregnancy.

Originally Posted by Prune Danish

Being a bastard has nothing to do with marriage and everything to do with miscegenation - the sin of crossing bloodlines with Godless races.

So Mrs. Van HellOnWheels is saying that The LORD is a negro ... or worse, a curry-muncher?! What a ghastly woman!

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle

NO!

How doesn't it? I think it does.

OF COURSE HE WAS JOSEPH'S SON! He simply wasn't sired by Joseph.

He was Jospeh's step-son. Correct me if I'm wrong, but in order for someone to be someone's father, they need to have planted their seed into the woman's womb. Jesus was not born of Joseph's seed. Therefore, he was not his son.

Please keep your illogical nonsense to yourself. The Holy Spirit 'Came upon" Mary, and Joseph was told to like it or else!

It isn't illogical. You're being illogical. I'm simply pointing out simple facts that even a child could see!

Because of one simple little fact. Women are damned by GOD and everything they do is wrong unless their husband or father tells them to do it. If it is still wrong, it is the woman's fault.

And how is that right, or fair?
In other religions besides the abrhamaic ones, deities are beings to look up to, to aspire to, that have virtuous/admirable characteristics. The god you worship happily seems to do in the bible all the things he then condemns others for doing and then goes on to say how unforgivable they are! Is that a deity to look up to, to aspire to?

Do you know why you get migraines, MISSY? I'll tell you! Because you are trying to think! GOD doesn't want women to think, but merely to bake little soldiers for JESUS.

I'd really rather not get pregnant again, Pastor, and seeing as I was born with a brain, I might as well put it to some use.

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

was Mary married to god? No, she wasn't, she was to be married to Joseph.

All True Christians™ are married to God:

Matthew 9:15 And Jesus said unto them, Can the children of the bridechamber mourn, as long as the bridegroom is with them? but the days will come, when the bridegroom shall be taken from them, and then shall they fast.

Luke 5:34 And he said unto them, Can ye make the children of the bridechamber fast, while the bridegroom is with them?
Luke 5:35 But the days will come, when the bridegroom shall be taken away from them, and then shall they fast in those days.

Revelation 21:2 And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.

Of course, you wouldn't know about this, since you're a wicker who go a whoring after your FALSE gods.

[lilith]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

It is not. I've done nothing but point out what is in the bible. The same bible which YOU follow to the letter!


Being a bastard is not the same as being fatherless. Being a bastard is when a child is illegitimate ie born out of wedlock as Jesus clearly was. The bible states she was not married at the time, and that she became pregnant.
Therefore, Jesus was illegitimate (ie a bastard)case closed!


Quit fantasizing about punching me already.


He wouldn't have found her to be one!
And it would have been up to her to publicly disgrace her, or to deal with her family. Clearly, he did not wish to publically disgrace her, as is in Matthew:

Matthew 1: 18-19 18Now the birth of Jesus Christ was on this wise: When as his mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Ghost.
19Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a public example, was minded to put her away privily.

My what an interesting discussion...so Mary wasn't a virgin when she married Joseph & JC was in fact a bastard.

So...you lot worship these people because...?

Fine upstanding moral characters?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Originally Posted by lilith

My what an interesting discussion...so Mary wasn't a virgin when she married Joseph & JC was in fact a bastard.

Not at all! Mary was a virgin before and after JESUS' miraculous birth, which is what makes it a miracle. After JESUS grew up he naturally had nothing to do with the old JOO.

So...you lot worship these people because...?

Because it's ridiculous to try and run a Christian Ministry if one doesn't. Who would send us money?

Fine upstanding moral characters?

There was nothing immoral about it. The Holy Ghost told Mary how lucky she was and 'came upon' her. You can do that if you are GOD!

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Originally Posted by Prune Danish

All True Christians™ are married to God:

Matthew 9:15 And Jesus said unto them, Can the children of the bridechamber mourn, as long as the bridegroom is with them? but the days will come, when the bridegroom shall be taken from them, and then shall they fast.

Luke 5:34 And he said unto them, Can ye make the children of the bridechamber fast, while the bridegroom is with them?
Luke 5:35 But the days will come, when the bridegroom shall be taken away from them, and then shall they fast in those days.

Revelation 21:2 And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.

Your god is male, right? So then if that were the case, if all True Christians™ are married to god would that make all the male True Christians™ 'homers'?

Of course, you wouldn't know about this, since you're a wicker who go a whoring after your FALSE gods.

Who told you?? I mean. How silly. Of course I don't. I revere, I don't 'go a-whoring'.

[SalvationSeeker]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

[/color]
I revere, I don't 'go a-whoring'.

I suppose that's what you call it when you're 'serving' all those strange men at greyhound bus-stops too?
You only 'revere' them, just like Fishy reveres his local priest after communion?

[Glendora Christianson]

If I didn't know better, I'd say this is the climax before the demon comes spewing out of Mz. Bombhellsinker. She's babbling Biblical verses and claiming not to be a harlot. Sure, she's still defiant, but I think we're making genuine progress here. GLOATING GLYNNDIE

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by lilith

My what an interesting discussion...so Mary wasn't a virgin when she married Joseph & JC was in fact a bastard.

No Mary was a still a vigin because The Holy Spirit "came upon her", not "came in her". That important differance preserved her virginity.

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

Your god is male, right? So then if that were the case, if all True Christians™ are married to god would that make all the male True Christians™ 'homers'?

Watch your mouth, woman. Jesus has banned people for less.

There is a unique and very special relationship that exists between every True Christian™ and Jesus. That very special relationship is called "espousal." and a Biblical espousal is just as binding as a marriage.

We are espoused to a living Bridegroom, who loves us with an everlasting love. The bridegroom's father has selected the bride (Matthew 16.18), the father has paid the dowry (1 Cor 6.20, 1 Peter 1.18-19) and the bridegroom has given His pledge-gift (John 14:16), so now we are "sealed with that holy Spirit of promise" (Eph. 1:13). PRAISE! He pledged Himself to us. He gave Himself for us. We wear His ring.

The Song of Solomon describes the passion of the bride (i.e. the True Christian™ Church) waiting for her bridegroom. Jesus never married prior to the Cross, but soon He shall return and take His bride home to His father's house.

Song of Solomon 3:1 By night on my bed I sought him whom my soul loveth: I sought him, but I found him not.

Song of Solomon 2:4 He brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love.

[Bobby-Joe]

Also remember God could not have possibly married Mary because that would be incest (Mary being Jesus' mother, Jesus being God).

[Dukie]

Jesus will laugh when he asks you why you thought He wouldn't get into Heaven just before he pulls the clouds right out from under your feet, watching you tumble straight down to the desolate shores of the lake of fire where a horde of horny demons await your ample rectum. we'll all look down on you and giggle as they rip you to shreds and you screech for your soul. then you'll realize satan doesn't have ears for your gruesome sounds of pain. PRAISE!

[lilith]

Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe

No Mary was a still a vigin because The Holy Spirit "came upon her", not "came in her". That important differance preserved her virginity.

And you know this how?
Not being there at the time (unless there's something you're not telling us & you're way overdue for your pension) you can't possibly know.

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by lilith

And you know this how?
Not being there at the time (unless there's something you're not telling us & you're way overdue for your pension) you can't possibly know.

God was there Lilith and he wrote it down.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Originally Posted by Prune Danish

Watch your mouth, woman. Jesus has banned people for less.

There is a unique and very special relationship that exists between every True Christian™ and Jesus. That very special relationship is called "espousal." and a Biblical espousal is just as binding as a marriage.

We are espoused to a living Bridegroom, who loves us with an everlasting love. The bridegroom's father has selected the bride (Matthew 16.18), the father has paid the dowry (1 Cor 6.20, 1 Peter 1.18-19) and the bridegroom has given His pledge-gift (John 14,16), so now we are "sealed with that holy Spirit of promise" (Eph. 1:13). PRAISE! He pledged Himself to us. He gave Himself for us. We wear His ring.

Are you calling yourself a bride? I'm sorry, PD, but it sounds like what it sounds like!

Also remember God could not have possibly married Mary because that would be incest (Mary being Jesus' mother, Jesus being God).

The bible speaks of god and jesus being two separate beings. How could god 'father himself'?

And you're forgetting the point.

NEITHER GOD NOR JOSEPH WAS MARRIED TO MARY. THE BIRTH WAS ILLEGITIMATE.
Although it seems what you're saying is that the laws of your god apply to all but him!

[lilith]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

Are you calling yourself a bride? I'm sorry, PD, but it sounds like what it sounds like!


The bible speaks of god and jesus being two separate beings. How could god 'father himself'?

And you're forgetting the point.

NEITHER GOD NOR JOSEPH WAS MARRIED TO MARY. THE BIRTH WAS ILLEGITIMATE.
Although it seems what you're saying is that the laws of your god apply to all but him!

Prune Danish...as a bride



BJ:"god was there & he wrote it down?"

And you know THIS how?

[SalvationSeeker]

Originally Posted by lilith

BJ:"god was there & he wrote it down?"

And you know THIS how?

Because we have what He wrote down; The book of Genesis in the KJV1611 Bible. duh!