[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by XUnsurexX

Uh. It's pain to gorw up in a world filled with churchs like this. I mean, why did they come up with this stuff. Personally, I believe that everyone is forgiven when they 'die', and their bodies mean nothing anymore. Hey, even Hitler is in Heaven, or he might be reincarnated, but not Hitler anymore.

Yes yes, how nice for you. You live in a fantasy world where anything is possible and you just make it up as you go along. Whatever feels good, right?

Well listen Mr. lezbean; You are clearly possessed by satan and in deep need of exorcism. No one in their right mind would come into a Christian forum spewing the hatred that you have. We are telling you what IS GOING TO happen to you because of your depraved lifestyle. We are attempting to show you God's Divine Plan, but you want to force your views on us, crazy as they are.

If you reject God, then you are going to spend eternity in the lake of fire being tortured by satan. If you accept Him, then you at least have a chance of avoiding that. Although since you are just a female, maybe not....

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

Now, now, Pastor Al. You know you shouldn't think about going near bonfires, what with your...condition and all.


I personally think that it was made as a way to keep people in line. The women in line, so that the men could claim dominance over them. There used to be a lot more Pagan and nature based religions who honored women and goddesses....bad news for insecure men!

Pagan, you mean like the Ancient Greek Religions? Zeus and his merry little rape fest across the Mediterranean and all that is honoring women.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe

Pagan, you mean like the Ancient Greek Religions? Zeus and his merry little rape fest across the Mediterranean and all that is honoring women.

There are many different types of Paganism, BJ. That is one version. There are/were also types of Paganism that honored a Goddess.
Pagan is a very broad term, it does not just describe the one set of beliefs. You should know that.

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

There are many different types of Paganism, BJ. That is one version. There are/were also types of Paganism that honored a Goddess.
Pagan is a very broad term, it does not just describe the one set of beliefs. You should know that.

The Greeks are one of the best documented Rachael. Well that's the problem Rachael; I have problems finding these examples of mass cooter worship outside the fevered imaginations of Victorian English amateur scholars who were beaten too hard in public school. Moonflower shows me a lot of websites about it when I let her have computer privileges but I find them terribly lacking in scholarly accreditation. Maybe it is because I am a Christian and follow a 2,000 year old book but I do like to see some primary sources as opposed to some self proclaimed priestesses pronouncements of hidden ancient wisdom.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Not everything is going to be as fully documented as the ways of the ancient Greeks. The ancient Greeks tended to have a lot of scholarly types who thrived on the written word and recorded a great deal....from beliefs to plays to the progress of wars etc. It's very interesting.
Incidentally, they did worship Goddesses, although their primary deity was male.

But you have to remember that that was the primary religion of ancient Greece. And last I recall, ancient Greece was not the whole world, nor the only time period.

[Brother Temperance]

Originally Posted by XUnsurexX

Uh. It's pain to gorw up in a world filled with churchs like this. I mean, why did they come up with this stuff.

Because GOD tells us to.

Originally Posted by XHomoseXual

Personally, I believe that everyone is forgiven when they 'die', and their bodies mean nothing anymore. Hey, even Hitler is in Heaven, or he might be reincarnated, but not Hitler anymore.

So you're saying that you can live a life dedicated to charity and helping others, and you'll end up the same as Hitler? Wow, how wonderfully moral.

Originally Posted by Von Hellbound

But you have to remember that that was the primary religion of ancient Greece. And last I recall, ancient Greece was not the whole world, nor the only time period.

No, it was just the only pagan society that ever achieved anything like any kind of civilisation.

[Brother Love]

Well....well....well...what do we have here? A LESS-bian comin into the HOUSE OF GOD spouting the LIES and ABOMINATIONS of her false lord, SATAN!!

YOU BET YOU ARE GOING TO HELL....SISTER!! In fact, you is so close to the FLAMES that you ought to be sweatin already!!

Get behind me Satan!! REPENT! TURN to the LORD for SALVATION before you die and find yourself in the midst of the DEVIL'S FURNACE!! Stop lettin Satan POSSESS you! Turn to JESUS!!

Equal rights? Oh bullhockey! Women shouldn't have equal rights or homersexuals either!! EQUAL RIGHTS??? Get you self in the KITCHEN cuz that IS where your equals rights are SISTER!! You wear men's clothing!! What an ABOMINATION in the EYES of the LORD God ALMIGHTY!! I suppose you is one of them people who is really a "man" (hehehe) born in a woman's body. What? You think GOD ALMIGHTY makes them kind of mistakes? I DON'T think so!! You speak your mind? Oh...oh...that means you spout your mouth as SATAN fills your head with words!! And you're not a Christian? Well JESUS do ya think we is all so STUPID here that we didn't figure that one out right away?

Hmmm.....not sure you believe in God/Jesus/or the Holy Ghost hey? Well MAYBE they DON'T believe in YOU either! Ever think bouts that? Your LACK of belief doesn't change the FACT of their REALNESS one iota! And you think everyone goes to Heaven when they die cuz you don't think there is any Hell? Well you is goin to find out how WRONG you are on the day you die SISTER! You are going to realize how wrong you were on the day you find yourself in HELL with the DEVIL pocking you with his PITCHFORK in your rear!

Is Landover real? Are YOU for real? GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY what a LOST SOUL you are SISTER!!

Well you have said every BLASPHEMIS thing you possibly could say while introducing yourself. Obviously you is bound over to the PIT in the midst of the Valley of Abominations and Desolations!! Go find your own kind! God knows you SONS AND DAUGHTERS OF DARKNESS dominate the Internet with your DEMONIC FORUMS!!

Can you feel my SEETHING teeth? Can you see the DISGUST on my face? That's cuz the HOLY GHOST is comin through me and right now HE is DISGUSTED with ya. Get on out of here! Ya ought not to even be on this forum! Take that WITCH HELL-sing with ya too! This forum is for the GLORY OF THE LORD not the devil who is your SUGAR DADDY!!

I'm callin down the BLOOD OF THE LAMB on you head, SISTER!
ABOMINATION!
DESOLATION!
SINNER!
REPENT NOW !!

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

Not everything is going to be as fully documented as the ways of the ancient Greeks. The ancient Greeks tended to have a lot of scholarly types who thrived on the written word and recorded a great deal....from beliefs to plays to the progress of wars etc. It's very interesting.
Incidentally, they did worship Goddesses, although their primary deity was male.

But you have to remember that that was the primary religion of ancient Greece. And last I recall, ancient Greece was not the whole world, nor the only time period.

And they were very found of traveling around, looking at other cultures beliefs and seeing the parallels. The ancient Celt were quite accepting that they and the Greeks were sharing the same false gods* under different names.

So were is this Great Cooter Goddess? This one?

http://www.spiralgoddess.com/Diana.html

Those are bull daddy bags draped around her BTW. Now there is a suggestion for outfitting your coven’s priestess at the next ceremony.


* really Satan in disguise.

[OnYourKnees]

Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe

Those are bull daddy bags draped around her BTW. Now there is a suggestion for outfitting your coven’s priestess at the next ceremony.

Did Moonflower teach you such things, B-J?

Just what HAS she been doing about your kitchen, besides baking Baby Jesus? Is she preparing you for a life as a <gasp> FASHION CONSULTANT??



Typical Fashion Consultant.

Say it ain't so, B-J! SAY IT AIN'T SO!!

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

There are/were also types of Paganism that honored a Goddess.

Yeah, like the thuggee cult (look it up; it's the source of our word "thug"). There's a wonderful example of a life-affirming goddess cult for us to emulate.

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by OnYourKnees

Did Moonflower teach you such things, B-J?

Just what HAS she been doing about your kitchen, besides baking Baby Jesus? Is she preparing you for a life as a <gasp> FASHION CONSULTANT??

Typical Fashion Consultant.

Say it ain't so, B-J! SAY IT AIN'T SO!!

It an't so friend.

Relaxed, in my position to struggle for Christ I need to know the ways of the great enemy so I can counteract his lies. Studying ancient sources to show the modern "pagan" how they are duped by Satan is just part of that. It is a sign of trust that the Landover tasks me with it. As Pastor Al has frequently told me he can think of no better Christian than me to infiltrate a nest of homers. He knows I will be all over those sinners and will unrelenting until I penetrated them to their deepest, darkest secrets. PRAISE!

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Originally Posted by XUnsurexX

Oh..and I also wanted to know if this Landover Baptists Church is real.

Why do you unsaved trash automatically question whether God's favorite church is real, just because we follow the Holy Bible as it is, rather than as liberal feminazis think it should be? I'll have you know that Landover Baptist Church is every bit as real as Our Lord Jesus Christ and the lake of fire into which He will drop-kick your heathenish soul for all eternity.

By the way, I see from your OP that either your or your friends at your fluffy-bunny, have-a-nice-day UU "church" (and no, I don't need to look it up) have already done extensive research in how to offend the Lord. Congratulations.

[OnYourKnees]

Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe

It an't so friend.

Relaxed, in my position to struggle for Christ I need to know the ways of the great enemy so I can counteract his lies. Studying ancient sources to show the modern "pagan" how they are duped by Satan is just part of that. It is a sign of trust that the Landover tasks me with it. As Pastor Al has frequently told me he can think of no better Christian than me to infiltrate a nest of homers. He knows I will be all over those sinners and will unrelenting until I penetrated them to their deepest, darkest secrets. PRAISE!

I feel much better now, friend. Thank you for explaining.

I had no idea you were so gifted, to be strong enough in your faith to dive into dens of iniquity and wallowing in the filth, only to suck out the demons within the cross-dressing homers and drag them back to Jesus!

I can only pray that one day, I will be able to move my ministry from secretive one-on-one confessions in back alleys outside bus stations to the group conversions you must perform in these centers of depravity!

PRAISE!

[SUV]

Originally Posted by OnYourKnees

I can only pray that one day, I will be able to move my ministry from secretive one-on-one confessions in back alleys outside bus stations

Whatever you do, don't try to infiltrate bus-stop Mens Rooms. The secular police already have them staked out!

One vile copper in particular, the notorious "Officer Mancuso," spends hour upon hour in these tiny stalls reading from a large book on philosophy, then harrassing Decent Christian Men after they come in to answer nature's call. Beware!

[Rachael Van Helsing]

I just know I'm going to regret asking this, but what exactly is a 'bull-daddy bag'?

[SUV]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

I just know I'm going to regret asking this, but what exactly is a 'bull-daddy bag'?

Maybe it's the Great Gran'daddy of a Nickel Bag?

Whatever that might be.

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

I just know I'm going to regret asking this, but what exactly is a 'bull-daddy bag'?

It's the bit that separates the oxes from the bulls. Two parts of the bull's (achm) "three piece suite". Work with me here Rachael, I am trying to have an educated conversation, not titillate sinner's over taxed libidos.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Originally Posted by Sister Sue Vera

Maybe it's the Great Gran'daddy of a Nickel Bag?

Whatever that might be.

A bag to carry nickels in?
Quite possibly....

It's the bit that separates the oxes from the bulls.

I still don't get it.

[SUV]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

A bag to carry nickels in?
Quite possibly....


I still don't get it.

Me either. Especially the part about the nickel bag.

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing

I still don't get it.

Jesus forgive me for saying the “t” word but bull testicles oh dense city girl. How do you make an ox? You castrate a bull. That statue of the "goddess" Artemise is covered with severed bull testicles, is that your goddess?

There, now you made me say the "t" word, did you get your little shameful thrill harlot????