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Ladies of Landover Senior VP One of the Truest Christians™ Ever Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
True Christian™
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Posts: 12,662
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Standing behind my husband
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 03:37 AM
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Originally Posted by Myers
And what about perscribed medicines? They heal cerebral and psychological problems without surgery and still work effectively.
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With True Christians, it's God doing the healing. With the unsaved, it's Satan making them think they're healed.
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Originally Posted by Born Again Kev
Six days? What does this mean? Let's dwell on that, shall we? Now, who created the universe? God, of course. Who wrote the Bible? God, of course. So from what vantage point is the story of creation told? God, of course. Now if the top of Mt. Everest represented God and the center of the Earth represented man, the distance would still not be enough. God is infinitely better than us. So, is it possible that He, not being on Earth, does not tell time by Earthly standards? What are billions of years to God? They could be as if they were only six days. The Bible and evolution don't contradict, after all.
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A day is a day. God wrote the Bible for us, His sinful children. If He meant millions of years, that's what He would have written so there would have been no misunderstandings.
Genesis 1:8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.
1:13 And the evening and the morning were the third day.
1:19 And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.
1:23 And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.
I don't know about you, but I don't go to bed then wake up in the morning millions of years later. The evening and the morning. It can't be much clearer than that. It took six days. Not six "God Days". To say otherwise is to call God a liar.
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Unsaved Trash Hellion, Clown Boy, etc. -- witless and vexations dunderheads
Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
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Posts: 115
Join Date: Dec 2006
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 03:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria
With True Christians, it's God doing the healing. With the unsaved, it's Satan making them think they're healed.
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And where exactly is your proof, Sister?
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Unsaved Angst-Ridden Trash Corinth or whatever his name is sneaking in again under another name for the umpteenth time.
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Posts: 45
Join Date: Jan 2007
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 03:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria
With True Christians, it's God doing the healing. With the unsaved, it's Satan making them think they're healed.
A day is a day. God wrote the Bible for us, His sinful children. If He meant millions of years, that's what He would have written so there would have been no misunderstandings.
Genesis 1:8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.
1:13 And the evening and the morning were the third day.
1:19 And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.
1:23 And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.
I don't know about you, but I don't go to bed then wake up in the morning millions of years later. The evening and the morning. It can't be much clearer than that. It took six days. Not six "God Days". To say otherwise is to call God a liar.
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Well, if you play tennis against no one, you'll win. Duh. It means nothing. If you play tennis against a worthy opponent, you have a challenge. If you win, it has meaning. God uses this very principle. Giving you the direct clear-cut answer would get you into Heaven easy. Making challenges in life is what makes it an accomplishment of value to get into Heaven. Not everything in the Bible is literal. About the days, let me say this:
DUH
I said that God is infinitely greater than us. Here's another analogy. Take an ant. It takes one step forward (all six legs I mean) and it is a less than an inch from where it started. Now have a T-Rex take a step forward. It'll be at least twenty feet from where it started. This is because the T-Rex is immensely larger than the ant. The ant can walk across town while the T-Rex walks across the country. We are smaller than the ant and God is larger than the T-Rex. It's entirely possible.
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Devout seeker of the Truth™
True Christian™
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Posts: 636
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 04:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Born Again Kev
Well, if you play tennis against no one, you'll win. Duh. It means nothing. If you play tennis against a worthy opponent, you have a challenge. If you win, it has meaning. God uses this very principle. Giving you the direct clear-cut answer would get you into Heaven easy. Making challenges in life is what makes it an accomplishment of value to get into Heaven. Not everything in the Bible is literal. About the days, let me say this:
DUH
I said that God is infinitely greater than us. Here's another analogy. Take an ant. It takes one step forward (all six legs I mean) and it is a less than an inch from where it started. Now have a T-Rex take a step forward. It'll be at least twenty feet from where it started. This is because the T-Rex is immensely larger than the ant. The ant can walk across town while the T-Rex walks across the country. We are smaller than the ant and God is larger than the T-Rex. It's entirely possible.
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We are not talking about steps here. We are talking about a period of time! Steps are subjective but a day is a day is day. Everything that walks have different sized steps but to everything a day is always the same length, 24 hours.
The Big-Bang: GOD spoke and, BANG, the universe was formed.
Genesis 1:1 - In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
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Unsaved Angst-Ridden Trash Corinth or whatever his name is sneaking in again under another name for the umpteenth time.
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Posts: 45
Join Date: Jan 2007
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 04:28 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesus is Lord
We are not talking about steps here. We are talking about a period of time! Steps are subjective but a day is a day is day. Everything that walks have different sized steps but to everything a day is always the same length, 24 hours.
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Actually, no, it's not. Only on Earth. In space, days do not exist. On other planets, days can either be longer, or shorter than Earth days, depending on the speed of the rotation of the planet in question. As I recall, God is not currently in tangible form, nor is He on the planet Earth as we are. I remember a Bible passage similar to what I'm saying, but I can't really be bothered to look at it now. It's much too late for me to go foraging. Anyway, think about it logically. It makes sense.
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Professor of English Landover University
True Christian™
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Posts: 3,501
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Ministering to the Liebral Godless of New Zealand
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 06:16 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Born Again Kev
Actually, no, it's not. Only on Earth. In space, days do not exist. On other planets, days can either be longer, or shorter than Earth days, depending on the speed of the rotation of the planet in question. As I recall, God is not currently in tangible form, nor is He on the planet Earth as we are. I remember a Bible passage similar to what I'm saying, but I can't really be bothered to look at it now. It's much too late for me to go foraging. Anyway, think about it logically. It makes sense.
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A day = an earth day. Just as the year in "lightyears" relates to a year on earth. The astronauts who went to the moon used earth time. Their watches measured earth hours. I believe these days that the concept of day, year, etc, is based on the second. It's the same in space as on earth.
Time does exist in space -- seconds exist in space, so days do too. (An hour is 60 seconds and a day is 24 hours.)
Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 01:56 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Born Again Kev
Actually, no, it's not. Only on Earth. In space, days do not exist. On other planets, days can either be longer, or shorter than Earth days, depending on the speed of the rotation of the planet in question. As I recall, God is not currently in tangible form, nor is He on the planet Earth as we are. I remember a Bible passage similar to what I'm saying, but I can't really be bothered to look at it now. It's much too late for me to go foraging. Anyway, think about it logically. It makes sense.
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So, basically, what you're saying is that God is infinitely powerful and Allmighty, and He created the heavens and the earth and everything in them, but He's not competent enough to write a book using clear and comprehensible language? Either that, or He deliberately made His book difficult to read, so as to make it harder for people to get into Heaven, and so deliberately condemn otherwise innocent people to eternal torture? Which is it, friend?
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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On Extended Furlough
True Christian™
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Posts: 4,784
Join Date: Nov 2006
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01-11-2007, 10:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Born Again Kev
Well, if you play tennis against no one, you'll win. Duh. It means nothing. If you play tennis against a worthy opponent, you have a challenge. If you win, it has meaning. God uses this very principle. Giving you the direct clear-cut answer would get you into Heaven easy. Making challenges in life is what makes it an accomplishment of value to get into Heaven.
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So you're saying that God set up life as a tennis match, and if you play a good game against God, you get to go to Heaven, and if you lose, you go to Hell.
Another demonstration of a just God by Kevin! WOOHOO!!
It's not you lose, so you have to buy God a beer. You lose, you spend eternity in torment!
So you're saying that God only wants SMART people in Heaven? People who can figure out riddles, because the Bible was written as some sort of screening tool to ensure the 'tards go to eternal punishment for being dull-witted?
What an interesting concept of God you have!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Born Again Kev
Actually, no, it's not. Only on Earth. In space, days do not exist. On other planets, days can either be longer, or shorter than Earth days, depending on the speed of the rotation of the planet in question. As I recall, God is not currently in tangible form, nor is He on the planet Earth as we are. I remember a Bible passage similar to what I'm saying, but I can't really be bothered to look at it now. It's much too late for me to go foraging. Anyway, think about it logically. It makes sense.
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Last time I considered the form of God, it was generally similar to human form. Why?
Hmm, possibly because He made humans IN HIS OWN IMAGE. Unless you don't take THAT part of the Bible "literally" either!
Now, He can take any form He wants, but He also CAME to Earth as a human, oh, about 2,000 years ago. A fella named Jesus, remember Him? Hung around for roughly 33 years. Got nailed to some wood. Died temporarily, resurrected Himself, then went back to Heaven.
It wasn't until 1611 that He re-dictated the Bible to the scribes of King James. Are you suggesting He forgot in that time how long a day was on Earth?
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 10:39 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Born Again Kev
Actually, no, it's not. Only on Earth. In space, days do not exist. On other planets, days can either be longer, or shorter than Earth days, depending on the speed of the rotation of the planet in question. As I recall, God is not currently in tangible form, nor is He on the planet Earth as we are. I remember a Bible passage similar to what I'm saying, but I can't really be bothered to look at it now. It's much too late for me to go foraging. Anyway, think about it logically. It makes sense.
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Interesting point you bring up here. I've had this debate with the landoverians before, and it brings up the fact that no outside universe or other planets are mentioned in the bible at all. Only Earth exists in the bible. No outer space, no other galaxies, no other planets. It mentions the sky as being a big dome with lights stuck to it, and it mentions the sun and the moon as the 'two great light sources'.
Therefore every time measurement in the bible would have to be in Earth standards, because the bible only acknowledges that EARTH exists!
By trying to say that evolution and the bible support each other, it's having the same effect as trying to support fire with water. You're quenching your own argument with such reasoning as effectively as if you'd just lit a fire then poured an excessive amount of water on it.
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 10:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
Interesting point you bring up here. I've had this debate with the landoverians before, and it brings up the fact that no outside universe or other planets are mentioned in the bible at all. Only Earth exists in the bible. No outer space, no other galaxies, no other planets. It mentions the sky as being a big dome with lights stuck to it, and it mentions the sun and the moon as the 'two great light sources'.
Therefore every time measurement in the bible would have to be in Earth standards, because the bible only acknowledges that EARTH exists!
By trying to say that evolution and the bible support each other, it's having the same effect as trying to support fire with water. You're quenching your own argument with such reasoning as effectively as if you'd just lit a fire then poured an excessive amount of water on it.
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Sweet Jesus, you are an empty-headed female. Why can't you heathens grasp the simple concept of time? A minute is still a minute ANYWHERE you care to measure it. If the Bible says something happened in a day or a week, then that is exactly what happened. There is no need to engage in arbitrary deconstructionism.
God has arranged things so that we can be on time for Church. Praise Jesus!
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 11:04 PM
Uhhh....Zeke, I was merely pointing out that the writers of the bible could only use Earth standards because it doesn't acknowledge that any other places outside Earth exist. The writers of genesis had no astronomy knowledge. What I'm saying is, you and Kevin have something in common. You're both brainwashed.
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 11:08 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
Uhhh....Zeke, I was merely pointing out that the writers of the bible could only use Earth standards because it doesn't acknowledge that any other places outside Earth exist. The writers of genesis had no astronomy knowledge. What I'm saying is, you and Kevin have something in common. You're both brainwashed.
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And you and starfinder both have something in common; you are dumb as a sack of rocks.
If Jesus has "brainwashed" me as you say, then I PRAISE and THANK HIM for it. GLORY!! We True Christians are the most joyful folks on earth!
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-11-2007, 11:35 PM
Hey, at least Star-Finder and myself are pro-peace! (I think SF is anyway) Thanks to pro-peace activists, this world might just be around a little bit longer (knock on wood) no thanks to xtian conservatives like yourselves who'd as soon see it destroyed, with the reasoning 'yeah, we'll die, but we'll take all the middle east along with us'.
Shameful.
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Unsaved Trash Hellion, Clown Boy, etc. -- witless and vexations dunderheads
Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
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Posts: 115
Join Date: Dec 2006
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-12-2007, 01:50 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
Yes, and you could be a figment of my imagination.
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Well, Al. You are a bit crazy, from what I've heard. It's plausible.
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Night Hag
Forum Member
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Posts: 1,231
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Enzed
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-12-2007, 01:52 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
Uhhh....Zeke, I was merely pointing out that the writers of the bible could only use Earth standards because it doesn't acknowledge that any other places outside Earth exist. The writers of genesis had no astronomy knowledge. What I'm saying is, you and Kevin have something in common. You're both brainwashed.
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Um...so you're assuming there WAS something there to be brainwashed then?
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-12-2007, 02:09 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilith
Um...so you're assuming there WAS something there to be brainwashed then?
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Well, they weren't born xtian. They were taught to be xtian. Therefore there must have been something there somewhere, I assume.
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-12-2007, 12:42 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
Hey, at least Star-Finder and myself are pro-peace! (I think SF is anyway) Thanks to pro-peace activists, this world might just be around a little bit longer (knock on wood) no thanks to xtian conservatives like yourselves who'd as soon see it destroyed, with the reasoning 'yeah, we'll die, but we'll take all the middle east along with us'.
Shameful.
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Friend, peace is not an option. The rest of the world is run by bloodthirsty Catholic Communists like Chavez Ortega, or else crazed uranium-enriching moonworshippers like Mahmad Ahmadjinad, who I strongly suspect of being a Polack in disguise. Peace is just another way of letting the terrorists win.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Hellbound
Well, they weren't born xtian. They were taught to be xtian. Therefore there must have been something there somewhere, I assume.
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There was indeed - SIN!
Psalm 51:5 Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.
Fortunately, however, Jesus' blood has washed our brains clean of all sin! Praise!
1 John 1:7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Night Hag
Forum Member
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Posts: 1,231
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Enzed
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Re: Teenage Jesus. -
01-13-2007, 03:40 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance
Friend, peace is not an option. The rest of the world is run by bloodthirsty Catholic Communists like Chavez Ortega, or else crazed uranium-enriching moonworshippers like Mahmad Ahmadjinad, who I strongly suspect of being a Polack in disguise. Peace is just another way of letting the terrorists win.
There was indeed - SIN!*
Psalm 51:5 Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.
Fortunately, however, Jesus' blood has washed our brains clean of all sin! Praise!
1 John 1:7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.
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* Um...Rachael? Case proven,I think!
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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