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Default Hell Explained - 04-04-2008, 09:31 PM

Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs
heat)?

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their
religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these
religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can
project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are,
we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,
then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over! The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore,
extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine
being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."
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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-04-2008, 09:36 PM

Do you know what Plagiarize means?

I bet you understand Copy and Paste?



Sister Talitha

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HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-04-2008, 09:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Talitha View Post
Do you know what Plagiarize means?

I bet you understand Copy and Paste?
Duh, I never claimed I wrote it Debbie Downer. I merely thought you might get a kick out it
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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-04-2008, 09:41 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alastor View Post
Duh, I never claimed I wrote it Debbie Downer. I merely thought you might get a kick out it
It would have been nice if on your first Post you could have introduced yourself in the INTRODUCTION THREAD and actually written something for yourself.
You can also tell us why you Love Jesus



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HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-04-2008, 09:52 PM

DISCLAIMER FOR ABOVE: The following is an actual question given on University of Washington chemistry mid term.

The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs
heat)?


<<You can also tell us why you Love Jesus>>

I don't my Cylon friend. I am merely here to examine a culture that completely baffles my mind - I have a lot of exploring to do....I am in utter shock. Is this lady here, I would really like to meet her.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCh2FXzD6R4
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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-04-2008, 10:01 PM

What we understand about Hell is that It's the main cause of Global Warming. There are so many Sinners going down to Hell these days that the temperature is rising and getting hotter. We don't need no scientific theories.
My Pappy told me that one when I was younger.

Why are you interested in that little girl?



Sister Talitha

Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-04-2008, 11:51 PM

If you want to know about hell, read THIS.

Most people will end up in hell. The list of candidates can be found summarized in my signature below.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-05-2008, 12:31 AM

Unless I am mistaken, the woman you found interesting in that television outtake was the one who appeared to be weigh something over 300 pounds, was missing one of her front teeth, and kept shrieking about someone's house being "darksided".

That woman is a Christian warrior.

Christians are never superstitious, but we know that there are DARK FORCES at work in the world! The almighty God who loves mankind as a father loves his children, allows these forces of consummate EVIL to ravage humans.

Shout HALLELUJAH! And praise the red-eye gravy, Mammy! (I am typing this as I eat supper, sorry.)

Anyway. The beast Satan prowls the clammy darkness of the whirling Earth. He is the spirit of murder, and of rape. Of disease and mutilation. Of violence and horrors untold. Of Unitarianism!!

That is probably what the poor Christian woman sensed in the "darksided" house she visited. The very pith and marrow of SATAN!

Those who are not Christians cannot understand the horror of the Ultimate Enemy of God. His brutish stench, his gnarled teeth, his nasty Bass Weejuns, his piggish red eyes. Well, not unless they've seen Adam Sandler in Little Nicky -- that comes pretty close to the ultimate horror.

Anyway. If there be questions, ask and ye shall be answered.

But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear:

Having a good conscience; that, whereas they speak evil of you, as of evildoers, they may be ashamed that falsely accuse your good conversation in Christ. Peter 3:15,16

Our Christian hearts are as open books, yea, even unto the right ventricle.

~~ OEJ
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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-05-2008, 03:16 PM

<<Those who are not Christians cannot understand the horror of the Ultimate Enemy of God. His brutish stench, his gnarled teeth, his nasty Bass Weejuns, his piggish red eyes.>>

Pffffff....you've never met my room mate.
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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-05-2008, 03:22 PM

I am guilty of most of your "below".

See you in hell, I'll be waiting
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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-05-2008, 03:47 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Talitha View Post
What we understand about Hell is that It's the main cause of Global Warming. There are so many Sinners going down to Hell these days that the temperature is rising and getting hotter. We don't need no scientific theories.
My Pappy told me that one when I was younger.

Why are you interested in that little girl?
She's 300 lbs haha. I am starting to warm up to you kids

So hell is responsible for global warming...hmmm. Do Cylons go to hell?
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Default Re: Hell Explained - 04-05-2008, 08:06 PM

Only Sister Talitha can answer that..........
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alastor View Post
She's 300 lbs haha. I am starting to warm up to you kids

So hell is responsible for global warming...hmmm. Do Cylons go to hell?




Leviticus 26:27-29

27 And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me;
28 Then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.
29 And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat.
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