The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus. |
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 63
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Elk Horn, Iowa
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How I found Jesus -
01-08-2017, 08:46 PM
Before I found Jesus, I was a stereotypical atheist who supported Muslims and their terrorism, and watched ungodly shows like Seth McFarland's Family Guy, American Dad, and The Cleveland show. But, after being buried in a pile of bibles from the sky in a freak accident; I saw the light and found Jesus. I was finally born again. I used my medical degree I got from a ungodly scientology class and got a job at the Researcher at the Elk Horn Christan Research Council ( EHRC). I have a tendency to step on toes. I apologize in advance.
Favorite Verse :Timothy 1:10 " for the sexually immoral, for those practicing homosexuality, for slave traders and liars and perjurers—and for whatever else is contrary to the sound doctrine". I chose this verse because it reminds me of what we fight for in order to preserve our faith.
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Gushing for Jesus
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: How I found Jesus -
01-08-2017, 09:02 PM
Welcome to the forums! Any friend of is a friend of mine! I'm amazed Jesus hasn't smited that Seth McFarland off the face of the earth yet. Perhaps He has plans to hit him over the head with a holy 2x4 like He did for Paul. Perhaps He has plans to torture McFarland on earth in a freak accident so he begins his suffering as a warning to others, before he begins his eternal consequences for mocking the Lord thy God. Anyway, tell us about yourself. What church do you attend now? Do you have a family? Does your wife homeschool all your children, and if so, does she start with the Pledge of Allegiance or Prayer?
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,666
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: How I found Jesus -
01-10-2017, 02:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FredClevland
Before I found Jesus, I was a stereotypical atheist who supported Muslims and their terrorism
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Muslims, although not worshipping any sort of god other than some joke cooked up a few centuries back, do not normally have much in common with atheists. I'm sure it would assist others to know, for more effective witnessing opportunities, which aspects of the sharia putsch dogma most resonated with you and most encouraged your "stereotypical" support?
Welcome to the forum where Christ may lead you into richer pastures.
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,984
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
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Re: How I found Jesus -
01-11-2017, 01:18 PM
Hold on a minute, you're a Scientologist? Stay away from my family!
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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Unsaved trash, the singing dictator
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Posts: 217
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: Pyongyang, DPRK, not France, I have fake IP which currently say I am in UK
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Re: How I found Jesus -
01-11-2017, 04:41 PM
I like Family Guy and American Dad, but I didn't care much for The Cleveland Show.
"When thou goest out to battle against thine enemies, and seest horses, and chariots, and a people more than thou, be not afraid of them: for the LORD thy God is with thee, which brought thee up out of the land of Egypt." - Deuteronomy 20:1
I like this one. If change "the LORD thy God" to the spirit of Juche and "the land of Egypt" to Japanese imperialism, then it can be used to metaphor Korea's struggle against the Western powers.
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 63
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Elk Horn, Iowa
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Re: How I found Jesus -
01-18-2017, 09:53 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
Hold on a minute, you're a Scientologist? Stay away from my family!
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I use to, but I saw the truth. I left and distanced myself from scientology. Jesus saved me and now, I dedicate my life to Jesus. I hope to be able to make new threads on this forum in the future. I have a lot of findings.
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True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
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Posts: 8,776
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Surrounded by heathens
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Re: How I found Jesus -
01-18-2017, 10:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FredClevland
I hope to be able to make new threads on this forum in the future. I have a lot of findings.
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If you use the search function, you will probably find that there is already an appropriate thread for whatever it is you feel obliged to share with us.
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,666
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: How I found Jesus -
01-20-2017, 11:33 PM
I TIMOTHY 1:10 For whoremongers, for them that defile themselves with mankind, for menstealers, for liars, for perjured persons, and if there be any other thing that is contrary to sound doctrine
context .. kjv
In the context link you can read more from I Timothy, one of my favourite books.
You will notice that slave trading is not mentioned specifically and that the NIV glosses over the issue of being (or patronising) whores. In addition the idea seems to be that harbouring thoughts of homosexual abominations such as dressing up like a trollop and hanging around the Y.W.C.A. or going down the docks wearing leather chaps and grab-handles but not actually doing this .— .or even doing this but just crouching (or standing) there and not suiting action to posture .— .is itself AN EQUAL SIN.
Such thoughts never occur to Christians because Christians are incapable of sin. Others seem unable to think of anything else. It revolts me.
I JOHN 3:9 Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God.
context .. kjv
People who think up their own rules, such as those who change what God has instructed by substituting words to reflect the zeitgeist of an era, recline in flowers of wickedness and we are diametrically opposed to them in every way even as light stands in opposition to darkness. There is no element of their doctrine having anything to do with God. I trust that you will see their error and turn to Jesus while there is time.
I JOHN 5:19 We know that we are of God, and the whole world lieth in wickedness.
context .. kjv
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 2
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Poughkeepsie NY
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Re: How I found Jesus -
01-23-2017, 03:52 PM
I was raised in a baptist house but I was never truly devout. I went to church every Sunday and said my prayers but I didn't live every action with Christ in my heart as I do today. I found God through the birth of my children. When I first saw the face of my eldest boy Abraham I knew that God was with me in every moment and that I owed my life and prosperity to him. I now life every day with full devotion and love towards the lord.
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Obese Swedish Meatball Delusional Forum Member
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Posts: 2,207
Join Date: May 2014
Location: On a mountain with a tree and a midgit
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Re: How I found Jesus -
01-23-2017, 04:04 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChristianFatherOf17
[...]I now life every day with full devotion and love towards the lord.
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Hello FatherOf17,
Somehow I have trouble believing you. How is not capitalizing ¨Lord¨ showing your true devotion? I hope you are not tying to pull a fast one on the sweet True Christians on this forum.
Kind regards,
Roland
Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.
Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 3
Join Date: Feb 2017
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Re: How I found Jesus -
02-06-2017, 08:29 PM
Or what if Jesus found you insted?
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Another brick in Donald´s wall - A.K.A "The Gonz" True Christian™
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Posts: 2,111
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ungodly South America
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Re: How I found Jesus -
02-07-2017, 06:59 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by prayeronly
Or what if Jesus found you insted?
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That will happen, in Rapture. Jesus will find us, and send us to Heaven with His Father (who happens to be himself as well!)
Aleluya! Aleluya! Glory to GOD! Praise the LORD!!!
1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
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