[xfrodobagginsx]

A note From Pastor Al:

Brethren, this post is the sort of stuff we warn you about every day. This is from some False Christian homer who came into this GODLY forum and started acting like SATAN. Watch out for him! He is a wiccan. DON'T LET HIM NEAR YOUR CHILDREN!


ARE YOU 100% SURE THAT IF YOU DIED TODAY THAT YOU WOULD GO TO HEAVEN?
IF YOU ARE WILLING TO RECEIVE JESUS CHRIST AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR, PLEASE PRAY THIS FROM YOUR HEART TO GOD,
"Dear LORD JESUS, I believe that YOU died on the Cross and Rose from the dead for my sins. I ask you to come into my heart and forgive me for my sins, take me to heaven when I die. I now receive You as my Lord and Savior. Thank You for saving me. In Jesus holy name, Amen."
If you prayed that prayer from your heart to God, and meant it with all of your heart, you are now a child of God and will go to heaven when you die.

1. REALIZE THAT YOU ARE A SINNER AND IN NEED OF A SAVIOR:
Ro 3:23 "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;"
Ro 3:10 "As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:"
This all began with the story of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. God created them perfect, there was no death or sorrow. God told them not to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. They disobeyed God and as a result, sin entered into the world. The pain which this world sees is the result of sin.
2. BECAUSE OF OUR SINS, WE DIE BOTH SPIRITUALLY AND PHYSICALLY, BUT GOD SENT HIS SON TO TAKE OUR PUNISHMENT AND GIVE US A CHANCE NOT TO HAVE TO GO TO HELL.
Ro 6:23 "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."
Ro 5:8 "But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."
Every person who has ever lived is a sinner and is not righteous because we do bad things. A sin is a crime against God, just as if you steal something at the store, it is punishable by going to jail. It's the same thing with sin. Even if we lie one time, the punishment is hell, which is a prison for those who commit crimes against God. No matter how well you live your life from then on, you have already committed a sin which will be punished if you are not pardoned. If you commit a crime, and then live as a good citizen you still will go to jail for the crime you committed. Right? Just as the president can pardon a crime so you won't go to jail, Jesus will pardon your sins so that you do not go to hell, and will go to heaven when you die.
3. IF WE WILL ACCEPT JESUS CHRIST AS OUR LORD WITH OUR MOUTH AND BELIEVE IN OUR HEART THAT HE ROSE FROM THE DEAD, BY DOING THIS WE ARE RECEIVING HIM:
Ro 10:9,10 "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation."
Joh 1:12 But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name: {power: or, the right, or, privilege}
(KJV)
You cannot get to heaven by being a good person, going to church, baptism or any other way other than by turning to Jesus and asking Him to forgive you for your sins and save you. While these are good things to do, some people believe that they will get to heaven if they do these things, but the bible says that there is only one way to heaven and that is through receiving what Jesus Christ did on the cross for you.
Will you do that today? If you will, you can be 100% sure that you will go to heaven when you die.
DO YOU BELIEVE THAT JESUS CHRIST DIED ON THE CROSS AND ROSE FROM THE DEAD FOR YOUR SINS? DO YOU ACCEPT WHAT HE DID FOR YOU TO PAY FOR YOUR SINS?
4. IF YOU ARE WILLING TO RECEIVE JESUS CHRIST AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR, PLEASE PRAY THIS FROM YOUR HEART TO GOD.
"Dear LORD JESUS, I believe that YOU died on the Cross and Rose from the dead for my sins. I ask you to come into my heart and forgive me for my sins, take me to heaven when I die. I now receive You as my Lord and Savior. Thank You for saving me. In Jesus holy name, Amen."
If you prayed that prayer from your heart to God, and meant it with all of your heart, you are now a child of God and will go to heaven when you die.
Now that you are on your way to heaven, you should attend a bible believing church and follow in baptism.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Yes, we know. We are JESUS' FAVORITE church. Are you a seventh day abominationist or a pennycostal or something? Because you're acting peculiar, Brother.

Maybe you will feel better after you tithe a hundred dollars or so. Just scroll down to the PayPal button.

[xfrodobagginsx]

First of all, you changed my answer in the poll. Second of all, Do you actually think that you are going to get to heaven by giving to a church?

[xfrodobagginsx]

Either this site is a huge joke, or it is a cult. You can't get to heaven by donating money to a church. It is only by trusting in Jesus Christ.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Originally Posted by xfrodobagginsx

Either this site is a huge joke, or it is a cult. You can't get to heaven by donating money to a church. It is only by trusting in Jesus Christ.

A joke, eh? Do you think hundreds of people would spend THOUSANDS of man-years learning the Bible in every detail just to play a bad joke on.....who....YOU?

Don't presume to tell US how to get to heaven. You have already admitted that you have been a FALSE CHRISTIAN all of your life and are damned to HELL for eternity. GET THEE HENCE, SATAN!

[xfrodobagginsx]

Actually it is you who are beginning to sound like satan. The Lord rebuke YOU by the blood of Christ. I didn't say that I have been living a bad life. I said that I was fed up with people who were self righeous. Don't tell me about the bible. I have been studying it for over 30 years and I have yet to find anyone who really believes that you get to heaven by giving a church money. Jesus Christ is the way. This is what the bible really says. If you really knew your bible you would know that. I challenge you to show me one verse in the bible that says that you must give money to a church in order to get to heaven. You are not God, nor are you from God.

Joh 14:6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.
(KJV)

1Jo 5:12 He that hath the Son hath life; and he that hath not the Son of God hath not life.
(KJV)

This is what the bible says about men like you.

Ga 1:8 But though we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed.

Ga 1:9 As we said before, so say I now again, If any man preach any other gospel unto you than that ye have received, let him be accursed.
(KJV)

You preach another gospel. You need to repent to God and ask Him to forgive you from your sins and ask Jesus Christ to come into your heart. That is how you get to heaven.

Joh 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
(KJV)

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Originally Posted by xfrodobagginsx

Actually it is you who are beginning to sound like satan. The Lord rebuke YOU by the blood of Christ. I didn't say that I have been living a bad life. I said that I was fed up with people who were self righeous. Don't tell me about the bible. I have been studying it for over 30 years and I have yet to find anyone who really believes that you get to heaven by giving a church money. Jesus Christ is the way. This is what the bible really says. If you really knew your bible you would know that. I challenge you to show me one verse in the bible that says that you must give money to a church in order to get to heaven. You are not God, nor are you from God.

So FALSE CHRISTIANITY REARS IT'S UGLY HEAD. You want Scripture, Friend? I have it.

Malachai 3: 8,9

3:8 Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.

3:9 Ye are cursed with a curse: for ye have robbed me, even this whole nation.

Would you like to read it in the NEW TESTAMENT, Friend?

Matthew
23:23 Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone.

I am not going to bother with the rest of your drivel except to say that you are wrong about it as well. You are a false Christian preaching a FALSE doctrine. Enjoy HELL!



Joh 14:6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.
(KJV)

1Jo 5:12 He that hath the Son hath life; and he that hath not the Son of God hath not life.
(KJV)

This is what the bible says about men like you.

Ga 1:8 But though we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed.

Ga 1:9 As we said before, so say I now again, If any man preach any other gospel unto you than that ye have received, let him be accursed.
(KJV)

You preach another gospel.

Sadly, you are damned and cannot even see it.

[xfrodobagginsx]

That's what I thought your response would be. No biblical evidence because you don't know what the bible actually says. You are leading people into hell along with yourself. God will judge you, even if you think that this site is a joke.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Originally Posted by xfrodobagginsx

That's what I thought your response would be. No biblical evidence because you don't know what the bible actually says. You are leading people into hell along with yourself. God will judge you, even if you think that this site is a joke.

Excuuuuse me, but I do believe I included Scriptural references. They are pretty clear aren't they? If scriptures don't constitute Biblical evidence, what does? Whatever passes for a thought in your deranged mind?

[xfrodobagginsx]

Malachai 3: 8,9

3:8 Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.

3:9 Ye are cursed with a curse: for ye have robbed me, even this whole nation.



Matthew
23:23 Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone.

These are the verses that you used? Woa. These have to do with Believers tithing, not salvation. What are you talking about. It says you pay tithe and omit the weightier matters of the law. That means that tithing is not the most important aspect of the law. Where does it say that tithing gets you into heaven? It doesn't you false minister. Anyone can look and see that you are a liar. Read the thread "How to get to heaven when you die" It will tell you what the bible says about getting to heaven and it has nothing to do with tithing.

[kamaki]

Originally Posted by xfrodobagginsx

Malachai 3: 8,9

3:8 Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.

3:9 Ye are cursed with a curse: for ye have robbed me, even this whole nation.



Matthew
23:23 Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone.

These are the verses that you used? Woa. These have to do with Believers tithing, not salvation. What are you talking about. It says you pay tithe and omit the weightier matters of the law. That means that tithing is not the most important aspect of the law. Where does it say that tithing gets you into heaven? It doesn't you false minister. Anyone can look and see that you are a liar. Read the thread "How to get to heaven when you die" It will tell you what the bible says about getting to heaven and it has nothing to do with tithing.

It says that failing to tithe is stealing from GOD. What don''t you understand about that? I am getting a bit tired of you spamming this GODLY board with your 'How to get to HELL" drivel!

[Talitha]

Speaking of Giving to the Lord ExFrodoBagpuss, you are using God's Bandwidth when you come here.

Have you clicked on the Paypal Button yet and given a Donation to show your True™ love of Jesus©?
The Button is conveniently placed at the bottom of each page so you can't miss it.

I bet you haven't.

YIC
Sister Talitha

[Andreas]

Perhaps you should ad "i don't think there is a heaven" option to your poll.

[Talitha]

Originally Posted by Andreas

Perhaps you should ad "i don't think there is a heaven" option to your poll.

Stupid Boy!
This is a True Christian™ website, and God's© favourite at that.

That would not even be considered to be an option.

Anyway, shouldn't you be at school?

[Glendora Christianson]

Originally Posted by xfrodobagginsx

Now that you are on your way to heaven, you should attend a bible believing church and follow in baptism.

Thank you for that very good advice, xfrodobagginsx. And for those of you who are just visiting Landover Baptist Church, I'd like to point out that we are God's favorite Bible believing church and we are the only church to offer certified salvation.

PS I am concerned about the Hobbitesque name of our visitor. Certainly, hobbits aren't good Baptists!

[Andreas]

PS I am concerned about the Hobbitesque name of our visitor. Certainly, hobbits aren't good Baptists!

But they have so much in common with God: they don't actually exist!

[eliot mayfield]

Originally Posted by Andreas

But they have so much in common with God: they don't actually exist!

You know something young man. I almost feel sorry for you. But you're being offered a chance to be saved and you laugh at it. When you're burning in Hell, who'll be laughing at whom?

[Andreas]

You know something young man. I almost feel sorry for you. But you're being offered a chance to be saved and you laugh at it. When you're burning in Hell, who'll be laughing at whom?

And when exactly was I offered such wonderful chance?

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by Andreas

And when exactly was I offered such wonderful chance?

Does it matter? You have already turned it down. Remember Andreas God knew you answere would be no when He created the world. Are you going to call God a liar?

[Andreas]

Does it matter? You have already turned it down. Remember Andreas God knew you answere would be no when He created the world. Are you going to call God a liar?

Can hobbits lie?