[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Originally Posted by Attila's Wife

She hasn't even got one of her people to take the price tag off the bottom of those new shoes.



How unutterably VULGAR is that?

I noticed how easily that shoe came off of her foot and also noted that there are no fasteners (like shoe laces) to keep them on. I remarked to some female acquaintances who told me that those shoes are called "pumps". Now that brings up a whole set of sexual connotations (see below - "cylinders" and "tubes") that I won't go into (this is a family forum after all), but it does appear that Ms. Kidman wears shoes that can be quickly taken off to engage in impromptu orgies on a moments notice.

A quick lunch-table poll of my female teaching colleagues reveals that a "pump" is apparently a high-heeled shoe that stays on the foot by gripping the toe and heel tightly. When I asked these women for more information, they started eyeing me warily and heading off to the salad bar, so I backed off.

So, after lunch, it was off to the library to check out the origin of the term in some dictionaries. I suspected that these shoes are called "pumps" because their height pumps up the foot, or perhaps because wearing them inflates a person's appearance or confidence. But every dictionary listed the origin of the "shoe" definition of "pump," which first emerged in the 1500s, as "unknown."

So I consulted the Word Guy's Word Guy: etymologist Evan Morris, whose website The Word Detective (www.word-detective.com) has often helped me out in a pinch.

Morris notes that "pump," meaning "a mechanical device for raising water," emerged in the 1400s, apparently as an imitation of the sound a pump makes. Morris concedes that the origin of the term "pump" for a shoe is uncertain but proposes a persuasive explanation:

The key element of a mechanical pump is a piston or plunger that fits very tightly into a cylinder or tube. When the piston is raised, it draws the liquid up through the tube, and a valve closes to prevent the uplifted water from draining out.

During the 1500s, someone must have noticed a resemblance between the piston's snug fit in the cylinder and the snug fit of a foot in a close-fitting shoe. So this type of shoe became known as a "pump." (Reinforcing this origin is the fact that the pistons in pumps were sometimes called "pump shoes," presumably because, like shoes on a person walking, they rise and fall rhythmically.)

That's good enough for me. In language, as well as footwear, if the pump fits, wear it.

http://articles.courant.com/2013-04-...oe-origin-pump

[Attila's Wife]

But every dictionary listed the origin of the "shoe" definition of "pump," which first emerged in the 1500s, as "unknown."

I read somewhere that these shoes were originally bought for women by men who sent them out to work on the streets in them, and the word is a corruption of the word pimp.

[Mistress Cookie]

Maybe we have not tithed enough? Maybe God™s in essence.saying, Sure I'll publicly slay this Abominable Ginger Creature for you, but what's in it for me?

If we want God™ to take us seriously, we have to take TITHING seriously (might be the message).

I'm going to double my tithing this week. Surely that will do it.

WHO WILL STAND WITH ME?

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

One thing for sure, any woman who can afford pumps is not tithing enough for Jesus.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by Mistress Cookie

Maybe we have not tithed enough? Maybe God™s in essence.saying, Sure I'll publicly slay this Abominable Ginger Creature for you, but what's in it for me?

If we want God™ to take us seriously, we have to take TITHING seriously (might be the message).

I'm going to double my tithing this week. Surely that will do it.

WHO WILL STAND WITH ME?

I think all of you should! Oh, Praise JESUS!!

[James Hutchins]

Give to God, do not joo Jesus!

[Sister Saffie]

At least she escaped that crazy Scientology cult and got away from her gay ex husband but now her married to a drunken, druggie long haired hippie

[Brother Larry]

It is a shame she strayed from JESUS in the years since she did that wonderful "How To" film, The Stepford Wives. I am sure many Landover men got some great ideas there.

Hey, um - all the chicks here are REAL, aren't they? I mean, I get all freaked thinking about asking out a robot.

Keeping Nicole's future injury in prayers, I remain,

Your humble servant of GOD,
Brother Larry

[Attila's Wife]

Do you think Kidman got replaced by a robot, or at least got some spare parts put in, during the making of that movie? I mean, that would explain why she's so hard to damage.

[Brother Larry]

Originally Posted by Attila's Wife

Do you think Kidman got replaced by a robot, or at least got some spare parts put in, during the making of that movie? I mean, that would explain why she's so hard to damage.

I think you're onto something here. One would think that you could program her to make a decent movie if this were true. I don't know, though - I think everyone would agree that Australianians are weasels, since their British pansy influence runs deep.

Darn brits have to ruin everything.

USA USA USA

[Mistress Cookie]

Originally Posted by Attila's Wife

Do you think Kidman got replaced by a robot, or at least got some spare parts put in, during the making of that movie? I mean, that would explain why she's so hard to damage.

That wonderful children's movie The Stepford Wives brought back so many happy memories for me...a time when men were Men and women were women, and Amerika was America.

But the "actress" Glenn Close was in that movie, too. And she recently turned into a man!

[Attila's Wife]

I'm pretty sure that's not Glenn Close. Isn't it Peter O'Toole?

[Mistress Cookie]

Is it possible Mr. O'Toole clandestinely boosted his sagging career by being Glenn Close all along?

Was he always gay?

Did he do it for "the work" ? ?

[Attila's Wife]

Well, I really wouldn't like to speculate, but he did play the notorious T. E. Lawrence of Arabia, in a dress, apparently without embarrassment.

[Mistress Cookie]

Originally Posted by Attila's Wife

Well, I really wouldn't like to speculate...

Oh I know. Gossip's an ugly thing. But sometimes you need to get to the bottom of things, for the Greater Good.

I'll keep prying...who knows just how long he's been pulling this stunt?? And Glenn Close is such a steamy "sex symbol," too. How many of our mens' fantasies has he defiled??