The Thrifty Christian Business, Investing and Finance Tips for True Christians™ |
|
The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
|
|
Free to a Good Home -
05-17-2015, 01:25 AM
It looks like someone threw away this perfectly good black kid.
He's a tad young - but I'm sure if you start training him now he could get real good at shinnin' shoes and tap dancing.
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 1,716
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the midst of His Will®
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-17-2015, 05:15 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Daisy Mae Johnson
It looks like someone threw away this perfectly good black kid.
He's a tad young but I'm sure if you start now he could get real good at shinnin' shoes and tap dancing.
|
If you throw in a couple fifty pound sacks of premium Nigglet Chow™, I'll take him!
|
|
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 9,361
Join Date: Jan 2007
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-18-2015, 08:11 AM
No doubt there is a budding Buddy Bradley, Alvin Ailey, or a future Sammy Davis Jr. in the can. The clue here is that he has some watermelon in his hand. Once they have tasted fresh watermelon or a bucket of KFC they become finicky and refuse to eat the Nigglet Chow™, and it can get expensive to raise them.
Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
|
|
Psychotheological Analyst Therapist
|
|
Posts: 9,051
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Surrounded by queers.
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-18-2015, 12:24 PM
I'm not so sure about this. It looks rather uppity and no doubt has been put in the container for a good reason.
Could he be a nascent rapist, I wonder?
YIC
1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.
Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
|
|
Gushing for Jesus
|
|
Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-18-2015, 03:02 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr Laurence Niles
I'm not so sure about this. It looks rather uppity and no doubt has been put in the container for a good reason.
|
When my children give me "the look" like that, I find a bit of creative discipline for a few hours or days sets them straight.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 1,330
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: In the kitchen
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-18-2015, 04:39 PM
Sister daisy, dear:
Could I take him in? My husband is looking for a new Negro to take in and train. After all, whites are superior. Genesis 9:25 "And he said, Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren."
YiC,
Elizabeth
"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1
|
|
Landover Senior Outreach Touching Men, Women and Children with the Good News!
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 8,237
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Freehold Senior Estates
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-19-2015, 01:37 AM
He does look like a fine young buck, and I am tempted to adopt the child for help around the Porter home, when it matures. And he looks quite healthy for a Negro infant. 6-months old I am guessing by his height?
But there are considerations with the colored that aren't always so apparent, and I need to make sure it would not be a losing investment.
We don't fry foods anymore in the Porter home. My health won't allow any greasy menus. I imagine I could buy a small Fry-Daddy and deep-fry some chicken wings in lard from time to time to accommodate its dietary needs.
But we cannot afford to spend 5 dollars per pound on melons, out of season. And I understand this is a staple of the Negro diet. And I don't like or enjoy many greens. Collards I cannot digest.
And of course, there will be legal costs as well. Juvenile detention and court fees. Bail for narcotics arrests. The steep price for drug rehabilitation. Restitution orders for burglary and theft.
I'll draft a spreadsheet on the kitchen table tonight and discuss with Mrs. Porter to see if this is the right investment for us, and will let you know by the end of the week.
In Christ, my Sister in Christ.
Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
|
|
Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-19-2015, 09:40 AM
I like this one. I would pay $3.50 for him.
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
|
|
Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-19-2015, 10:10 AM
I have always heard that jigaboos are the sturdiest of livestock, with large muscles and purple gums. Why is this one sitting in a bucket. Is it sick?
Surely you are not bleaching it. If the lighter skin is not authentic I would consider that an unethical selling practice.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 1,716
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the midst of His Will®
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-21-2015, 03:03 AM
I'd like to retract my bid. Its always tempting to take in a stray, but they don't stay cute forever. Take Emmanuel Lewis for example:
Before
After
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,290
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: In Jesus' lap
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-21-2015, 10:28 AM
Looks like an online auction:
Brother Nobar - $3.50. Withdrawn.
Me - $0.50
Any other offers?
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,290
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: In Jesus' lap
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-21-2015, 10:33 AM
This one started out pretty cute, too:
and ended up like:
but if slavery weren't illegal under secular law, he would have made his owner a lot of money.
|
|
Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
|
|
Posts: 22,438
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-21-2015, 11:34 AM
I bid $1. I have rats under my house and need something small to catch and kill them. He can eat the rats to stay alive.
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,290
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: In Jesus' lap
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-21-2015, 09:12 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jim Farmer
Looks like an online auction:
Brother Nobar - $3.50. Withdrawn.
Me - $0.50
Any other offers?
|
I got it wrong. It was Brother Hammer who withdrew a supposed bid. Not Brother Nobar. Which means Nobar's bid of $3.50 still stands, I think. Sorry Brother Cranky. Do you up want to date your bid?
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 93
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Home
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-22-2015, 12:37 AM
While it may be a lot for a negro, I'll bid 5.00. We could definitely use a niglet in the Mitch household, what with us just moving in and all.
Psalm 53:1
The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. Corrupt are they, and have done abominable iniquity: there is none that doeth good.
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 1,716
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the midst of His Will®
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-22-2015, 03:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gregory Mitch
While it may be a lot for a negro, I'll bid 5.00. We could definitely use a niglet in the Mitch household, what with us just moving in and all.
|
If you win, make sure you castrate it before it grows up and rapes your entire family.
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 93
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Home
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-23-2015, 02:35 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer
If you win, make sure you castrate it before it grows up and rapes your entire family.
|
That is what I plan to do the day I get it, if I win, of course.
Psalm 53:1
The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. Corrupt are they, and have done abominable iniquity: there is none that doeth good.
|
|
Obese Swedish Meatball Delusional Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 2,207
Join Date: May 2014
Location: On a mountain with a tree and a midgit
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-25-2015, 02:03 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson
Sister daisy, dear:
Could I take him in? My husband is looking for a new Negro to take in and train. After all, whites are superior. Genesis 9:25 "And he said, Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren."
YiC,
Elizabeth
|
Hello Mrs. Elizabeth,
Since you are willing to take him in and are not so adamant on castrating this child I will enter this auction so you can raise this child. Not only is it seemingly a Christian thing to buy someone out of slavery on the behalf of others, I think it will do you both good. I will offer $10,00 to get him free and into your household.
Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.
Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.
|
Unsaved trash, admitted retard
|
|
Posts: 45
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Riding the short bus to hellfire
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-25-2015, 03:48 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roland
Hello Mrs. Elizabeth,
Since you are willing to take him in and are not so adamant on castrating this child I will enter this auction so you can raise this child. Not only is it seemingly a Christian thing to buy someone out of slavery on the behalf of others, I think it will do you both good. I will offer $10,00 to get him free and into your household.
|
1,000! And I thought my 5.00 offer was overpriced!
Ecclesiastes 4:5 The fool foldeth his hands together, and eateth his own flesh.
|
Unsaved trash, admitted retard
|
|
Posts: 45
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Riding the short bus to hellfire
|
|
Re: Free to a Good Home -
05-25-2015, 03:53 PM
Joking, of course. Selling humans is wrong, and illegal. Also, even if humans where sellable, only one thousand? Really?
Ecclesiastes 4:5 The fool foldeth his hands together, and eateth his own flesh.
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved
|