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  • #31
    Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

    Originally posted by jennabenna View Post
    How dare you call my wife a cow! She's better than any woman you're ever going to get, and women love gay guys!
    If you have a wife, then you are the husband, and that's a man. so are you a man or just lying about being married?

    Comment

    • #32
      Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

      I'm a lesbian, stupid. Have you actually read any of my posts, or do you just have some canned responses that you spout at random?
      If you want to post here, you will abide by the rules. Admin

      Comment

      • #33
        Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

        Originally posted by jennabenna View Post
        I'm a lesbian, stupid. Have you actually read any of my posts, or do you just have some canned responses that you spout at random?

        That's funny, i searched for the definition of husband.
        A husband is a male participant in a marriage

        So just who is stupid.

        Comment

        • #34
          Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

          I'm not really a fan of material gifts as such, but the best present I have ever received was the direction given to me by Jesus, to this forum.
          Matthew 10:34
          Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.

          Comment

          • #35
            Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

            Originally posted by jennabenna View Post
            How dare you call my wife a cow! She's better than any woman you're ever going to get, and women love gay guys!
            On behalf of Landover Baptist Church forums, I would like to formally apologise to the noble bovine race for any offence or injury caused by the comparison between those innocent creatures and the abominable dyke slut you're fornicating with.
            O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



            God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

            Comment

            • #36
              Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

              Originally posted by James Dewitt View Post
              That's funny, i searched for the definition of husband.
              A husband is a male participant in a marriage

              So just who is stupid.
              You. I never said I was a husband. I just said that she was a wife.
              Ry'Kelle= My wife.
              Jenna (me)= Ry'kelle's wife.
              We are wives to each other. There are two wives in my marriage. 1 girl+ 1 girl= 2 girls. Two female participants. No husbands. No penises. Just two girls.
              If you want to post here, you will abide by the rules. Admin

              Comment

              • #37
                Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

                Originally posted by jennabenna View Post
                How dare you call my wife a cow!
                If the moo fits, wear it!
                Bible boring? Nonsense!
                Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                Comment

                • #38
                  Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

                  Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
                  If the moo fits, wear it!



                  That was a good one, Rev. Rodimer.
                  Who Will Jesus Damn?

                  Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                  Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                  Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                  Comment

                  • #39
                    Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

                    I got a drum set.

                    Comment

                    • #40
                      Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

                      Originally posted by jennabenna View Post
                      You. I never said I was a husband. I just said that she was a wife.
                      Ry'Kelle= My wife.
                      Jenna (me)= Ry'kelle's wife.
                      We are wives to each other. There are two wives in my marriage. 1 girl+ 1 girl= 2 girls. Two female participants. No husbands. No penises. Just two girls.
                      You're making this up. A woman marrying a woman is absurd enough, but a woman marrying Cthulu's house?
                      O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                      God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                      Comment

                      • #41
                        Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

                        The wife and the girls got me this. I got a bit misty when I opened it.



                        Chesty Puller was a Godly Marine.

                        Jesus loves Dick



                        Cheney/Palin 2012

                        Comment

                        • #42
                          Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

                          Originally posted by jennabenna View Post
                          You. I never said I was a husband. I just said that she was a wife.
                          Ry'Kelle= My wife.
                          Jenna (me)= Ry'kelle's wife.
                          We are wives to each other. There are two wives in my marriage. 1 girl+ 1 girl= 2 girls. Two female participants. No husbands. No penises. Just two girls.
                          1 girl + 1 girl = a real bad day, unless you are Satan, ENJOY HELL!

                          Comment

                          • #43
                            Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

                            I celebrated christmas (in swedish its called "Jul" so personally i think its hilarious that you write christmas with a large "CHRIST" ) with the regular food, pig, fish and meatballs and getting drunk with my friends on new years eve.
                            This space is reserved for the posting of KJV Scripture ONLY. --ADMIN

                            Comment

                            • #44
                              Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

                              Originally posted by nord-olof View Post
                              I celebrated christmas (in swedish its called "Jul" so personally i think its hilarious that you write christmas with a large "CHRIST" ) with the regular food, pig, fish and meatballs and getting drunk with my friends on new years eve.
                              Why are you barbarians so determined to take the Christ out of Christmas? Also, why are you so determined to take the "Jul" out of "July"?
                              O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                              God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                              Comment

                              • #45
                                Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

                                Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
                                I had a wonderful CHRISTmas. I made a turkey with all the trimmings and Pastor Zeke came over early with his presents and we had a toast to JESUS' Birthday with some very old wine. Then we opened presents.

                                Anyway, he got me a new male nigra servant (since he fired the last one for stealing pies cooling on my windowsill) and a beautiful gift basket with some bubble bath and stuff.

                                THANK YOU ZEKE and HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!!!
                                That sounds like a really nice Xmas! I am glad you were able to celebrate Jesus' Birthday with Pastor Zekiel. As for me, I spent Xmas alone. I did not have any presents to open; but I don't deserve any. This day is about Jesus; and it was selfish of me to be resentful for not having any gifts of my own. 2011 will be the year that I am saved. I just know it. While I may be a bit down right now; rest assured I am going to the used book store tomorrow and will buy a KJ Bible. I realize there is no other way for me. Love - Sunshine!

                                Comment

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