Promise Enforcers - Men Only! We make Promise Keepers look like homers! No homosexuals or women allowed! |
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Gushing for Jesus
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Posts: 23,742
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Attention Men: Do NOT get a prostate exam! -
08-10-2014, 01:07 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by love54321
You prayed for the finger to turn into a female's. Yep, definitely a troll.
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Oh ye of little faith. Jesus promises us that if we have true faith, we can do greater work than He did (and He reversed bodily decomposition due to death John 11:38-53; drove a herd of wild pigs to Suicide By Demon Luke 8:27-33, destroyed a fig tree for its insolence for not providing Him with its fruit off season Mark 11:12-14).
Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me, the works that I do shall he do also;
and greater works than these shall he do; because I go unto my Father.
And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do,
that the Father may be glorified in the Son.
If ye shall ask any thing in my name, I will do it.
John 14:12-14
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 1
Join Date: Aug 2014
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Re: Attention Men: Do NOT get a prostate exam! -
08-15-2014, 10:42 PM
YOU ARE AN IDIOT! AND TO ALL OF YOU GUESS FREAKING WHAT? IF YOU DO NOT ACCEPT ANOTHER PERSONS WORD AND BE RECEPTIVE, YOU ARE NO BETTER THEN ADOLF HITLER!
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Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
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Posts: 14,455
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The other end of the internet
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Re: Attention Men: Do NOT get a prostate exam! -
08-15-2014, 11:37 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lover of the lord
YOU ARE AN IDIOT! AND TO ALL OF YOU GUESS FREAKING WHAT? IF YOU DO NOT ACCEPT ANOTHER PERSONS WORD AND BE RECEPTIVE, YOU ARE NO BETTER THEN ADOLF HITLER!
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Calm down, please (at least long enough to Google "Godwin Fail").
After that, could you please point out the Scripture that says Christians are supposed to listen to other points of view? Thanks.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Attention Men: Do NOT get a prostate exam! -
08-16-2014, 02:51 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lover of the lord
YOU ARE AN IDIOT! AND TO ALL OF YOU GUESS FREAKING WHAT? IF YOU DO NOT ACCEPT ANOTHER PERSONS WORD AND BE RECEPTIVE, YOU ARE NO BETTER THEN ADOLF HITLER!
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Please make a thread of your own in the " Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.
And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.
I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Pathetic Liar
Under Investigation
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Posts: 21
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: orally servicing strangers in the park
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Re: Attention Men: Do NOT get a prostate exam! -
11-26-2014, 10:19 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
Atheists will come up with any bogus reason they can to violate another man's anus. Now they have redefined anal sex as "medicine". What is next? Murder will be "exercise" and stealing will be "accounting"?
What if the man has an org*sm from having his anus fingered? Then the doctor is guilty of genocide from all the partial birth abortions coming out of the man's p*nis! I'll bet this is the real plan behind theier liberal plot.
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So you would rather get cancer than a procedure that takes less than 2 minutes btw I'm pretty sure liberals are more focused on other things than tainting prostate exams. I lost my grandfather to prostate cancer and if he would have gotten his check ups he'd still be hear today if only he had medical marihuana
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Distinguished Professor of Prayer Healing and Creation Zoology (Baraminology) Victim of atheist scientific persecution
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Posts: 10,336
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: On a mission in Godless Europistan
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Re: Attention Men: Do NOT get a prostate exam! -
11-26-2014, 10:43 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by AtheistPotsmoker
So you would rather get cancer than a procedure that takes less than 2 minutes btw I'm pretty sure liberals are more focused on other things than tainting prostate exams. I lost my grandfather to prostate cancer and if he would have gotten his check ups he'd still be hear today if only he had medical marihuana
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Dear Miss Smoker,
Why should I worry about cancer? At best, it can hasten my entry into Heaven to be with Jesus. it would be a glorious GIFT from God to be able to die sooner and see the magnificent Creator eye to eye. In case my duties spreading the Gospel require me to stay on Earth longer than expected, any potential cancer is easily cured by prayer.
Matthew 10:1
And when he had called unto him his twelve disciples, he gave them power against unclean spirits, to cast them out, and to heal all manner of sickness and all manner of disease.
Matthew 10:8
Heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead, cast out devils: freely ye have received, freely give.
Of course I'd rather get cancer than lose my place in Heaven due to the resurfacing of cast-off homeric impulses. This should be obvious.
Yours in Christ,
Elmer
2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.
PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
Check out our Research in Creation Science:
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South of the Border outreach program True Christian™
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Posts: 13,156
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Godly Midwest
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Re: Attention Men: Do NOT get a prostate exam! -
11-26-2014, 08:11 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elmer G. White
Dear Miss Smoker,
Why should I worry about cancer? At best, it can hasten my entry into Heaven to be with Jesus. it would be a glorious GIFT from God to be able to die sooner and see the magnificent Creator eye to eye. In case my duties spreading the Gospel require me to stay on Earth longer than expected, any potential cancer is easily cured by prayer.
Matthew 10:1
And when he had called unto him his twelve disciples, he gave them power against unclean spirits, to cast them out, and to heal all manner of sickness and all manner of disease.
Matthew 10:8
Heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead, cast out devils: freely ye have received, freely give.
Of course I'd rather get cancer than lose my place in Heaven due to the resurfacing of cast-off homeric impulses. This should be obvious.
Yours in Christ,
Elmer
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Amen, Brother! Doctors are "playing God," or, more correctly, playing with Satan by working against God's Will! Truly faithful don't need doctors to get cured:
James 5:14-16:
14 Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord:
15 And the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he have committed sins, they shall be forgiven him.
16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
Praise !
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Ladies of Landover Senior VP One of the Truest Christians™ Ever Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
True Christian™
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Posts: 12,662
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Standing behind my husband
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Re: Attention Men: Do NOT get a prostate exam! -
07-31-2017, 03:05 PM
It seems that some people don't spend their free time after prayer and Bible study to read every thread on this forum.
http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=113096
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