The Poetaster's Korner Tasteful poetry for JESUS but don't let the flowers fool you. NO HOMERS ALLOWED! |
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,716
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the midst of His Will®
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True Christian Haiku -
11-27-2013, 03:33 AM
As much as I hate to admit it, the slopes may have hit on something with the Haiku. The power and simplicity of the format sure lends itself to expressing the principles of True Christianity...
two gayrods
sweaty from exertion
Jesus weeps
shady window sill
hot pie cools
a coon is near
mouthy wife
with busted lip
should have shut up
better to trust
a poison snake
than hook-nosed joos
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 12
Join Date: Nov 2014
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Re: True Christian Haiku -
12-02-2014, 02:41 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer
As much as I hate to admit it, the slopes may have hit on something with the Haiku. The power and simplicity of the format sure lends itself to expressing the principles of True Christianity...
two gayrods
sweaty from exertion
Jesus weeps
shady window sill
hot pie cools
a coon is near
mouthy wife
with busted lip
should have shut up
better to trust
a poison snake
than hook-nosed joos
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Thought Haikus had 17 beats 5-7-5 or are these the English translations. Mine have 17 beats but different line lenghts. By th term "con" hope you meant the animal, not the derogatory term for black person, not very Christian like if you did.
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Gushing for Jesus
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: True Christian Haiku -
12-02-2014, 02:48 PM
Know-it-all heathens
Bring God's Wrath upon themselves
Jesus will have
the last laugh
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 12
Join Date: Nov 2014
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Re: True Christian Haiku -
12-02-2014, 04:22 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Know-it-all heathens
Bring God's Wrath upon themselves
Jesus will have
the last laugh
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I'm sure he will but who will be laughing with him?
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: True Christian Haiku -
12-03-2014, 03:53 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by trev_wy
Thought Haikus had 17 beats 5-7-5 or are these the English translations. Mine have 17 beats but different line lenghts. By th term "con" hope you meant the animal, not the derogatory term for black person, not very Christian like if you did.
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Please make a thread of your own in the " Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.
And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.
I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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True Christian™ Creation Scientist Fisher of Men
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,835
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: True Christian Haiku -
12-03-2014, 04:02 AM
Praising LORD Jesus
Gives me something to do and
Makes me happier
Sometimes I praise Him
While I'm doing other things
And have accidents
It's okay to pray
With your eyes open at times
When you are driving
I had my doubts but
Prayed on this crucial matter
Jesus says it's fine
I would be so lost
Without Jesus in my life
I don't have hobbies
II Thessalonians 1:7-9
And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels,
In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ:
Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power
The man who is being progressively sanctified will inescapably sanctify his home, school, politics, economics, science, and all things else by understanding and interpreting all things in terms of the Word of God and by bringing all things under the Dominion of Christ the King. -R.J. Rushdoony
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Serving Jesus
True Christian™
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Posts: 4,470
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Godly Texas, Besieged by Papist Idol Worshippers
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Re: True Christian Haiku -
12-03-2014, 04:48 AM
When we saw them cavort
We knew they were awash with sin
And we gouged out their eyes
God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,766
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry, Redding, CA
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Re: True Christian Haiku -
12-03-2014, 08:49 AM
I refuse to write any of this haiku drivel. I still haven't forgiven the orientals for what they did to us at Pearl Harbor and My Lai. Well, I forgave them as an act of Christian charity, of course, but that doesn't mean that I'm not going to hold it against them personally.
Draft Freehold, Iowa Mayor
Johny Joe Hold
for Vice President in 2024
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