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Cool Uber cars - How to win both MONEY and SOULS to Jesus - 06-24-2015, 04:29 AM

Brethren,

Ar 19 years of age my eldest Mark is almost past being administered the rod on a daily basis, looking for a female wife and a good driver. As our family is in a slight economic nishap, he came up with the idea of a quiring some urgently needed funds for our daily breadtithing duties.

Enter the Uber Solution!



Quote:
To passengers, Uber is essentially synonymous with taxis, and to drivers, it’s basically a referral service. The Android, iOS and Windows Phone app connects riders with drivers using their phone’s GPS capabilities, letting both parties know one another’s location and removing the question of when the ride will actually arrive.
Much more than a catchy name, Uber has managed to capture its share of the market through a great app, excellent social media marketing, and aggressive courting of drivers. The background technology is remarkable, connecting riders and drivers with a smooth interface that rarely reports errors. It also has the potential to do much more than offer rides — in bringing flu shots, ice cream, and even kittens to users’ doors, it’s shown the ability to be a groundbreaking delivery service, too.
Delivery Service! This caught my attention! We can DELIVER THE WORD OF GOD TO THE MASSES. Or my eldest Mark can!



Matthew 28:19-20
Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost:

Obviously, the car is now painted with verses. There is a good stock of KJVs in printed and electronic form available. Mark, who has memorized most of the Bible anyway, quotes his favorite passages to the passangers. Many customers have been eager to leave the car in a haste once they reach their destination to spread the message of Jesus to their loved ones. I see many other opportunities including Baptisms and education people about recent Creation. Our vehicles can become Chariots of Jesus!



2 Samuel 8:4
And David took from him a thousand chariots, and seven hundred horsemen, and twenty thousand footmen: and David houghed all the chariot horses, but reserved of them for an hundred chariots.




To conclude, this will also be a solution to get the new jet plane our Pastor desperately needs. Hundreds of dollars can be gained every week! It's in essence Jesus Himself bringing His Word to the masses with the latest technology!






Yours in Christ,

Elmer


2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.



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African Re: Uber cars - How to win both MONEY and SOULS to Jesus - 06-26-2015, 02:28 AM

Imagine baptising hordes of Godless porch monkeys in one fell swoop! The Uberfleet needs fire trucks.
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Elmer G. White's Avatar
Elmer G. White Elmer G. White is offline
Distinguished Professor of Prayer Healing and Creation Zoology (Baraminology)
Victim of atheist scientific persecution
 

Protected by JESUS Heaven Bound Friend of Jesus Christian Love True Christian™ Touched by Jesus Persecuted Honorary Ex-Eskimo Ex-Scandinavian Ex-eurotrash True Scientist™ 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Doctor Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture Flat Earth Prayer Warrior Ex-Masturbator Tell her once True Christian Caucasian Real American™ Porn Resistant The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking One Year/1000 posts 2014 Witch Hunt Award Mower Mission to Korea Uber Angels Driver Trump of GOD Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Mission to Messico Saved 1 Year Platinum Tither Eats the Most Pork True Heterosexual™ 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Crown of Glory BFF of Jesus Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Crown of Righteousness Alternative Facts True Christian Nerd GLORY Saved 5 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Get Behind Me Doctor - NO TEAM FORTRESS! Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor

 
Posts: 10,328
Join Date: Apr 2014
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Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Elmer G. White will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Guns Re: Uber cars - How to win both MONEY and SOULS to Jesus - 06-26-2015, 04:55 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer View Post
Imagine baptising hordes of Godless porch monkeys in one fell swoop! The Uberfleet needs fire trucks.
Brother, this is more urgent than ever. As soon as Landover Baptists recognized the potential of this system, the atheist community and the papists decided to strike back. In repulsive France, atheist and Muslim and papist taxi drives are in RAGE over bringing the message of Jesus to sinners by perfectly appropriate evangelizing while driving.

This is happening right now!


Quote:
Taxi drivers hit the streets of France to protest on Thursday, bringing some of the country's main transport arteries to a total standstill.
They are officially protesting against Uber's ride-hailing app UberPOP, which allows users to be picked up by uncertified drivers.
But the protest also seems to be about Uber in general. In some places there has been outright violence, with burning tyres, flares, flipped cars, and riot police.
France is not the only place where taxi drivers have protested over Uber's apps, but the demonstrations have been much more violent than in other European cities.
They are turning over vehicles and burning them. Fire trucks would be most useful to turn the tide, literally, over these enemies of Jesus! How can they do this the sweet Jesus who only wants the best for us all.


They have fire now, but gentle Jesus will show them the REAL fire in due course!

Ezekiel 22:22
As silver is melted in the midst of the furnace, so shall ye be melted in the midst thereof; and ye shall know that I the LORD have poured out my fury upon you.



Yours in Christ,

Elmer


2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.



PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
Check out our Research in Creation Science:
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