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Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum A Christian Help Forum led by Sister Daisy Mae Johnson. Warning! Sometimes the Lord's advice is a hard pill to swallow.

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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 10:36 PM

And how would I go about doing that? I thought Ouija boards were evil tools of Satan... Tarot cards? The same...

Do I call up John Edwards?

Honestly, how does a dead man get payment back?


- CK
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-05-2008, 10:41 PM

Also...

You can ban me now if you wish. I've had my fun with your forum and your heads. After all, I was just in here to troll around, start some flame wars, and generally give you guys something to do other than just sitting on your thumbs and wishing someone would talk to you.

Have a nice day!

Oh, btw...

I'm straight, and not a furry. I belong to the Westboro Baptist Church. I was sent your link, and wanted to test your faith. Surprisingly, you didn't buckle! We will send you a memo if you'd like to come protest some soldier funerals.


- CK
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-08-2008, 03:41 PM

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Originally Posted by CeeKay View Post
I'm straight, and not a furry. I belong to the Westboro Baptist Church. - CK
Sure you do. And I'm John McCain.


Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-09-2008, 07:46 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by CeeKay View Post
And how would I go about doing that? I thought Ouija boards were evil tools of Satan... Tarot cards? The same...

Do I call up John Edwards?

Honestly, how does a dead man get payment back?


- CK
John Edwards is a disgraced Demoncrat who cheated on his wife. She has cancer.

John Edward is a has-been TV psychic that used to have a show on The Sci-Fi channel.

Call up whoever you like dimwit, you're still going to Hell unless you become a True Christian™.




Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-10-2008, 04:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by CeeKay View Post
Also...

You can ban me now if you wish. I've had my fun with your forum and your heads. After all, I was just in here to troll around, start some flame wars, and generally give you guys something to do other than just sitting on your thumbs and wishing someone would talk to you.

Have a nice day!
so... when are you going to get started then ?

Quote:
Originally Posted by CeeKay View Post
Also...
I'm straight, and not a furry. I belong to the Westboro Baptist Church. I was sent your link, and wanted to test your faith. Surprisingly, you didn't buckle! We will send you a memo if you'd like to come protest some soldier funerals.

- CK
yeah right...
if you mean you protest about heroes whio served being buried right as they can be...
you got to be some kind of homo fag.




Seek Salvation in Him,
or His Judgement will seek you.
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-10-2008, 05:07 PM

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Originally Posted by PlasmaFox View Post
All my life, I have been a Christian. I was born and raised in a Christian home with a Christian family, and I have dedicated my life to God and His creations.

Though one thing has concerned me: furries. I am, of course, not talking about the heathen Satanic sodomite heretics that see themselves as the reincarnation of some evil homosexual dragon hell-bent on having sex with every male on Earth and in Hell. I am talking about those people who love animals (purely in a platonic way!) and dress up in suits that make them resemble anthropomorphic animals.

At first I saw furries as sickening, but as I met and spoke with one, I gradually realized, that not all of them are God-hating bastards. Just most of them.

Is this an affront to God? Is pretending to be an animal a sin? If it is, how do I repent? How can I be saved?

Stay away from anywhere that takes a liberal outlook on hunting seasons...
If you don't you will soon get an answer as to whether perverts who dress as animals go to hell...

We once had a bunch of wiccy waccies started using our land for some sorry assed rituals that started out with them dressed as deer and stags....
This on a stretch of private land that raises deer for stalking...

still the local Coroner, a good Christian types in his way. was very understanding and sensible when he determined accidental death.
and accidental wounding contrived by the injured parties own deliberate negligence in regard to their safety..

This whole furry thing is just thinly veiled paganism.
stay away from it, or book your ticket for hell's hottest game reserve.




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or His Judgement will seek you.
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 10-07-2008, 01:11 AM

You are truly a disgusting hellbound sinner!


Gather around so that I can read to you from my book of TRUTH. Genesis thru Revelations....Pick one!

Luke 12:5- But I will forewarn you whom ye shall fear: Fear him, which after he hath killed hath power to cast into hell; yea, I say unto you, Fear him.
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 08:25 AM

*claps loudly for all the posters here* My my I must say that all of your "Christian views" truly amuse me. I am quite sorry for all of you "Unsaved Unwelcome" where the "Worthy Worship"? Truly this is a joke? But lets go down the line shall we?

First ill start with you Talitha, and dont worry; I have one for just about all of you. But you'll most likely ban me for speaking some sense into you mormons, since you will have nothing but hard headed and immature responses.

1.) "We take any kind of Credit Card.
You can easily borrow money to pay for your Salvation.
No other Church offers you a "Salvation Guaranteed .... or your Money back" offer"

2.) "A Loving Donation to your Favorite Baptist Church works wonders too.
Where else could you get a money-back guarantee of Salvation?"

So your christian perspective is that being a christian is all about money? Or that Donations can "a loving donation" can work "wonders"? John 2:15 you BLASPHEMOUS excuse of a human.

"Next Tell me, what Church do you attend?
Do they only use the one True King James Bible?
Do you tithe regularly?
How many children do you have?"

"Ah yes!! Ted Blackwood, your Minister.
I think we'll have to have words. If he's allowing all these freaks to walk your streets then he's not doing his job properly."

How is this any of your business to demand of someone? He came to you for help and advice and you interrogate him? Are you MENTAL? Excuse me for the stupid question, you obviously are. Next, who the hell do you think you are "Oh sister of God" to be thinking to tell a pastor how to do his job, much less call someone a freak. And you think the Lord frowns upon furries? Look in a mirror "sister", God has one coming your way.
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 08:32 AM

Next comes you, and most likely the most disgusting demon of them all "Pastor" Ezekiel. You think because your parent drilled some sick anti-humane view of the Bible in your head and gave you a cookie-cutter Bible name doesn't mean your a christian sir. Next that you would even DARE to think of yourself as a pastor and state
"Then hear this, you little pervert: God hates freaks who dress up in wierd clothes. so stop it already! Can't you just be normal?! Jesus temporarily suffered and died for our sins! show a little respect, you damned degenerate!"

Show a little respect? Hope you were talking into a mirror when you said that because your message is filled with NOTHING but hate, disrespect, immaturity, lack of wisdom/knowledge, and LACK OF GOD. you use words like "freaks and damned degenerate". Would you call someone that if Jesus stood right next to you? No you wouldn't would you? You would be too easy trying to lick dirt of his shoes to act like your some almighty christian, NEWS FLASH; you aren't. It's called Ephesians 4:32 you hypocritical vermin. Get off the podium and stop spreading your lies and venom you "Damned degenerate".
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 08:41 AM

Next down the line is you Rodimer.

'Right off the top of my head, I can mention a "culture" that does exactly what you suggest. The Native Americans, commonly known as "American Injuns", dress up as various animals, claiming that they have animal "spirit guides". We True Christians™ know that they are being misled by demons, but they ignore our warnings.

How's that working out for them?

Judging by their situation -- crammed into tiny plots of worthless land where nothing can grow, subsisting on alcohol and insulin injections (because they're all fat drunks with diabetes), collecting welfare and generally educating themselves to the level of the average retarded -- I'd say GOD HATES INJUNS.

Why?

BECAUSE THEY ARE FURRIES."

So what happened to the conquest of mutiple advanced civilizations, disease, wars, natural causes, and the political abuse by the English; what? Didn't happen? If your gonna go into history have some real facts to back up your claims. You can not draw refrences and point fingers when you have no proof that a civilization ended up the way it did simple because of their culture.

"(I know how you False Christians like to ignore the Bible, so we'll try this on your level.)"

Oh do not worry, I completely understand; Let me come down to YOUR level then "false Christian". What about the Chinese? They dress up as dragons and various animals for various parties and events, yet; let me check... Oh yes that's right; they are a leading super power. What happened there? God miss one? or two? Or perhaps lets try at least 50 countries that have animalistic ties in the culture? Nice try buddy, but no; you can bend simplistic minds who easily bend to fear and persecution from idiots like you, but I will not be swayed by your truly pathetic lies.
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 08:47 AM

Do forgive me, my spell check corrected me improperly, I meant to say "mormons" not "Mormons" my mistake
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 08:53 AM

Behold another "Sister" stands up for the true spirit of the Lord and His grace, love, and compassion. Lets delve into her words here to get a taste of God shall we?
"Who left the door open? The flies are coming in...."

Hmm... This must be a mistake, perhaps I copied the wrong message? Nope, that is "Sister" Rebecca's response to people of the opposite belief attempting to reason. No madam, you are not a christian by the Holy Bible. You are a cynical forked-tongue snake that slithers around seeking whom you might bite and harm with your words. I would much rather be a fly, than a snake. So do us all a favor and unless you have a true well-thought opinion or knowledge on the subject; keep your forked tongue behind your teeth where it belongs.
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 09:45 AM

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Originally Posted by Sommaren View Post
*** tl:dr ***
Hello! I am glad that you are considering leaving your beast-filled life behind you and are looking to us for guidance. Jesus Christ wants you in Heaven, and I do, too!

(Psalms 37:4) "Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart."

Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth


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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 10:24 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sommaren View Post
...NEWS FLASH; you aren't. It's called Ephesians 4:32 you hypocritical vermin. Get off the podium and stop spreading your lies and venom you "Damned degenerate".
I was going to address your points one by one, but the task is immense as you clearly have no idea whatsoever of what the Bible (KJV1611) says. You quote Ephisians, yet is not Ephisians an epistle written to True Christians™? So when Paul refers to "you", to whom is he referring?
(i) Assholes who dress up in fur disguises to imitate soulless animals
(ii) True Christians™?

You seem to think that the answer is (i)...

Let me tell you, to be a Christian, you have to have the critical thinking skills to be able to understand the Bible in the way God intended. Once you have reached that point, you can relax and let the Bible (and thus God) do your thinking for you.

You have not yet reached stage 1.




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and crime is what Black people do.

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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 03:09 PM

Actually if you took the time to actually process some though before blurting out the first stupidity that came to mind, perhaps you would look quite as dumb as you do now. I WAS stating that Ephesians was for "True Christians" had you realized that my comment was directed at Ezekiel, so before you make a comment read and understand what your responding to. You claim to follow God? PLAY the role, give me one instance where Jesus calls someone a "Damn Degenerate", "Freak", "Faggot", etc... Not once right? That's because Jesus had love and compassion and hes trying to teach you that, but you all seem to be missing that point.

Again, know what your trying to argue before making a comment.
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 03:13 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sommaren View Post
Actually if you took the time to actually process some though before blurting out the first stupidity that came to mind, perhaps you would look quite as dumb as you do now. I WAS stating that Ephesians was for "True Christians" had you realized that my comment was directed at Ezekiel, so before you make a comment read and understand what your responding to. You claim to follow God? PLAY the role, give me one instance where Jesus calls someone a "Damn Degenerate", "Freak", "Faggot", etc... Not once right? That's because Jesus had love and compassion and hes trying to teach you that, but you all seem to be missing that point.

Again, know what your trying to argue before making a comment.
You should be more respectful as a guest in our online home, don't you think, friend?


The vine is dried up, and the fig tree languisheth; the pomegranate tree, the palm tree also, and the apple tree, even all the trees of the field, are withered: because joy is withered away from the sons of men.~Joel 1:12
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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 03:33 PM

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Originally Posted by Sommaren View Post
Actually if you took the time to actually process some though before blurting out the first stupidity that came to mind, perhaps you would look quite as dumb as you do now. I WAS stating that Ephesians was for "True Christians" had you realized that my comment was directed at Ezekiel, so before you make a comment read and understand what your responding to. You claim to follow God? PLAY the role, give me one instance where Jesus calls someone a "Damn Degenerate", "Freak", "Faggot", etc... Not once right? That's because Jesus had love and compassion and hes trying to teach you that, but you all seem to be missing that point.

Again, know what your trying to argue before making a comment.
No, no, no you quote mining furry twit; that bit of Ephesians is part of Christ's instruction on how TRUE Christians behave towards each other. Not on how we are supposed to behave with moral degenerate freaks like you Furries. Christ's specially orders us no to deal with wicked deviants. Yes, we know Christ kept company with tax collectors and prostitutes but that was Christ.

I mean honestly, this has to be the stupidest fetish in the history of mankind and most likely Jesus will just laugh you all out of Heaven. Heck even Christians are willing to say kind things about homosexuals. No one has ever accused a furry of being a basically good person fallen into a bad habit.



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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 03:53 PM

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Originally Posted by Sommaren View Post
Actually if you took the time to actually process some though
Most adults don't "process some through" the tantrums of unruly, ungrateful, spoiled children. If you have something to say, please do say so calmly, politely, and back it up with scripture from the King James Bible.

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Originally Posted by Sommaren View Post
That's because Jesus had love and compassion and hes trying to teach you that, but you all seem to be missing that point.
Jesus had love and compassion for His followers, that is, True Christians™ like us. He also commanded us,

And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.
Ephesians 5:11


I hope that helps clear up your confusion.



Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 04:41 PM

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Oh do not worry, I completely understand; Let me come down to YOUR level then "false Christian". What about the Chinese? They dress up as dragons and various animals for various parties and events, yet; let me check... Oh yes that's right; they are a leading super power. What happened there? God miss one? or two? Or perhaps lets try at least 50 countries that have animalistic ties in the culture? Nice try buddy, but no; you can bend simplistic minds who easily bend to fear and persecution from idiots like you, but I will not be swayed by your truly pathetic lies.
Chinks? You think chinks are Godly? Hardly! They worship some fat dead bald guy AND they're Commies to boot! Think they're getting into Heaven? Not likely.




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Default Re: Can furries go to Heaven? - 09-24-2012, 08:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sommaren View Post
Actually if you took the time to actually process some though before blurting out the first stupidity that came to mind, perhaps you would look quite as dumb as you do now. I WAS stating that Ephesians was for "True Christians"
Then what exactly is your point? We are kind to fellow True Christians™. You are not one.

You claim to follow God? PLAY the role, give me one instance where Jesus calls someone a "Damn Degenerate", "Freak", "Faggot", etc... Not once right? [/QUOTE]
Not one.

He did call Canaanites "dogs" (oooo, ethnic slur!) and Pharisees, Sadducees, and others "vipers" and "serpents". Good enough?

I know, I know, you have never heard such things because you've not read the Bible.


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