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  • #1

    Sometimes, I Go Moist

    Although I want so much to please every man
    By giving them the very best pie I can,
    I hope the Lord forgives the times
    When in my recipes and in my rhymes
    I choose to add more moisture to my pan.

    Sometimes, I go moist.

    It doesn't mean I'm bad
    My pie will make you glad
    In fact it has made many folk rejoice.
    What goes inside is pleasing,
    I don't want to seem I'm teasing
    But it makes me want to offer you a choice.

    Slippery, like butter, as I mold it in my hands
    Texture is important to most men.
    So please, judge me not when my pie, steaming hot
    Is still glistening with moisture when I bring it to your den

    For sometimes, I go moist.
    1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
    Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
    Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
    Locations in 50 States and Canada
    !Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
    Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
    Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.
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  • #2
    Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

    Lovely poem, Miss Naomi! You have brought a tear of joy to my eye.

    It is so nice to see a sweet young lady waxing rhapsodic about the importance of moisture and texture in presenting a tasty pie.

    1 Corinthians 10:31 (1611 King James Bible)

    Whether therfore ye eat or drinke, or whatsoeuer ye doe, doe all to the glory of God.
    I'm sure one piece of your warm moist pie would have me shouting GLORY to GOD!
    sigpic

    I Kings 7:23

    And he made a moulten Sea, ten cubites from the one brim to the other: it was round all about, & his height was fiue cubits: and a line of thirtie cubites did compasse it round about.

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    • #3
      Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

      What a beautiful poem Sister Lamb! It really makes me want to taste your moist pie!
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      • #4
        Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

        Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
        What a beautiful poem Sister Lamb! It really makes me want to taste your moist pie!
        Oh Daisy,

        I could never match my pie against yours. I mean, you've won so many years in a row that I dare not even enter mine in competition with yours. How sweet of you to say, though.

        Your Sister,
        NRL
        1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
        Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
        Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
        Locations in 50 States and Canada
        !Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
        Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
        Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.

        Comment

        • #5
          Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

          Indeed, I'm suddenly hungry for a heaping helping of pie. The sloppier, the better!

          WARNING:
          In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
          REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

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          • #6
            Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

            I lurrrrrrvvee moist pies.
            Naomi, Do you think one day I may taste yours? Please? Then I could offer you my pie to taste. A pie tasting session!
            The thought of it makes me all aquiver.

            Comment

            • #7
              Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

              Originally posted by IreneS View Post
              I lurrrrrrvvee moist pies.
              Naomi, Do you think one day I may taste yours? Please? Then I could offer you my pie to taste. A pie tasting session!
              The thought of it makes me all aquiver.
              Certainly, Irene. One question though:

              Are you wearing appropriate gloves as you clean that floor? Mother is concerned that you may be picking up dangerous germs on your hands. A Christian lady is always mindful of such things, since what goes on your hands goes in your pie.

              Yours in Caring and Sisterhood,
              NRL
              1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
              Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
              Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
              Locations in 50 States and Canada
              !Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
              Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
              Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.

              Comment

              • #8
                Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

                Miss Lamb, of course! I always wear surgical gloves except when it comes to pies. My finger nails are kept very short - no telling of what germs can lurk beneath long finger nails, and I dutifully scrub my hands up to the elbows before handling any pies. You can never be careful enough when it comes to hygiene! Long fingernails belong to whores, and harbour all sorts of nasty germs.

                Comment

                • #9
                  Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

                  Ladies, ladies, there is not need for wearing gloves, nor washing your hands. Germs can't hurt Christians.
                  WARNING:
                  In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                  REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

                    Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
                    Ladies, ladies, there is not need for wearing gloves, nor washing your hands. Germs can't hurt Christians.
                    But Faith Machine, doesn't that only apply to men?
                    Mark 7:15

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

                      Originally posted by IreneS View Post
                      But Faith Machine, doesn't that only apply to men?
                      Mark 7:15
                      It doesn't really make a difference if a woman gets sick or not, since God has set things up in such a way that they will all burn in Hell no matter what. Ephesians 5:22-24 states that a woman must serve two masters, while Luke 16:13 states quite clearly that this is impossible for anyone to accomplish.

                      22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
                      23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
                      24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
                      No servant can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.
                      Praise Him, for He is Holy!
                      The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!

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                      • #12
                        Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

                        It's nice but too many commas.
                        May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

                          Such a moving poem. It has put me in mind of a nice warm, moist pie this evening when I get home from work.

                          I only hope Mrs. Taylor comes up with the goods. If not I suppose the rod will not be spared.
                          Isaiah 66:15

                          For behold, the Lord wil come with fire, and with his charets like a whirlewinde, to render his anger with furie, and his rebuke with flames of fire.

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                          • #14
                            Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

                            My HUSBAND loves it when I put bananas and cream in mine.

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              Re: Sometimes, I Go Moist

                              How many bananas do you normally put in it?

                              And where do you get your cream? I know a lady who gets her cream from this dairy co-op run by about five or six colored fellas? Their cream is really thick and delicious. I tell you, there have been times when I've really made a mess of my shirt licking all their cream out of her cream pies.
                              WARNING:
                              In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                              REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

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