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Smile THIS DAY IN HISTORY: NOVEMBER 22, NOVEMBER 23, NOVEMBER 24 - 11-22-2009, 10:22 PM

November 22nd is:

Feast of Saint Cecilia. Or it would be a feast if you had food, which most Catholics around the world DON'T, no matter how much they pray to their bling-covered decadent palace-dweller in Rome.

Lebanon – Independence Day (from France, 1943). The French are so wimpy they can't even control a bunch of hummus-munching wogs.

Astrology: usually the first day of sun sign Sagittarius or the last day of Scorpio. If you know what this means, Biblical Law demands that you be executed, witch.

This day in history:

2008 – YouTube hosts the largest ever live broadcast, YouTube Live. Because the previous record for grainy pirated video and unbelieably crude and stupid comments just wasn't grainy enough, pirated enough, etc.

2005 – Angela Merkel becomes the first openly female Chancellor of Germany. She is one of the few women who would look better with a mustache, if you know what I mean.

2004 – The Orange Revolution begins in Ukraine, resulting in....What exactly? They're still a bunch of vodka-guzzling slavs (from which we get the word slave) who worship dripping paintings of Mary. Sober up, cut out the idolatry, get right with Christ, THAT will be a revoltuion.

2002 – In Nigeria, more than 100 people are killed during an attack aimed at the slutty harlot contestants of the Miss World contest. Blacks are so incompetant they can't even kill malnourished, anorexic, high-heel wearing models. Deep breath, slowly squeeze the trigger....It's not rocket science! And have any of you ever heard of headshots?

1993 -- US: Congress passes North American Free Trade Agreement (NAFTA). Are you richer than you were 16 years ago? I sure am. Pity about the NWO one-world government it ushered in, though.

1988 – In Palmdale, California, the first prototype B-2 Spirit stealth bomber is revealed. At only a billion dollars each (not including cost of nuclear payload) they're a small price to day to fight the battle of Armageddom with style.

1975 – Juan Carlos is declared King of Spain following the ascention to heaven of patriot Francisco Franco.

1963 – In Dallas, Texas, God uses a "magic bullet" (technically a miracle bullet) to smite US President John F. Kennedy.
Republican pamflet from 1963.
1954 – The liberal-bias Humane Society of the United States is founded. Basically PETA but stealthier.

1943 – Lebanon gains independence from France. The French may be wimpy, but even wimpier is:

1940 – Greek troops counterattack into Italian-occupied Albania and capture Korytsa. Observers of wimpiness, we have a weiner!

1934 - Negro ordered to bust up chiffarobe, instead rapes white girl, as documented in Jesus Lee novel To Kill a Mockingbird

1922 – Egyptology: (also known as grave-robbing and corpse-desecration in the name of celebrating heathen savages) Howard Carter, assisted by Lord Carnarvon, opens the tomb of Tutankhamun.

1920 - Mussolini's squad pacifies 11 communists in Bologna.

1891 - Birth of Dr. Edward L. Bernays, "father of public relations". Liberated women by convincing them to smoke. Helped United Fruit overthrow Guatemalan Pres. Arbenz when he got uppity.

1873 - American lawyer Horatio G. Spafford's four daughters drowned when their passenger ship, while crossing the Atlantic, collided with another and sank. This inspired Horatio to pen the hymn "It is Well With My Soul." Proof that God works in mysterious ways. It was all part of His divine plan when Jesus murdered those four innocent little girls with His Holy Waterboard.

1859 – Charles Darwin's satanic screed On the Origin of Species is first offered for sale, in London, England. And Londoners keep wondering why London keeps getting bombed. (WW1, WW2, IRA, 7/7/7....Ever considered that God is trying to tell you something?)

1633 - Catholic illegal immigrants get an early start as Irish Catholic Cecil Calvert, sends two ships (the Ark and the Dove) from Ireland to establish a colony in Maryland. More proof that Maryland (a blue state) isn't even part of America.

1220 - Pope Honorius III crowns Holy Roman Emperor Frederick in St. Peter's, on the promise that he promote a crusade. It's not the last time the Vatican helps a warmonger take charge of the German Riech...

498 – After the death of Anastasius II, Symmachus is elected Pope in the Lateran Palace, while Laurentius is elected Pope in Santa Maria Maggiore. That's right, the Catholics had TWO infallable Popes who disagreed, infallably. Do Catholics beleive God has a Split-Personality Disorder?

Damned to hell on November 22nd:

2008 – MC Breed, American rapper. Currently breeding with male demons, in da house where the MC is SATAN.

2007 – Maurice Béjart, Father of the Ballet Renewal (homosexual)

2007 – Verity Lambert, first producer of British SF series Doctor Who, which is filled with false teachings and tentacle porn.

1994 – Forrest White, former vice president of Fender Musical Instruments Corporation. Created instruments of death-metal devil music.

1980 - Mae West, proto-porn star.

1963 - John F Kennedy. God sure enjoys killing Kennedys.

1963 - C.S. Lewis. Anglican (basically Catholic) scholar, author of "The Chronicles of Narnia".

1916 - Jack London, author, socialist.

479 - Confucious, Chinese false-god


Ascended to heaven on November 22nd:

1993 - Anthony Burgess, Author. Documented youth culture and recommended possible remedies in A Clockwork Orange.1963 – Wilhelm Beiglböck, German physician, persecuted by jews, victim of holohoax

1941 – Werner Mölders, ace fighter pilot

1718 – Blackbeard (Edward Teach), repented ex-British pirate, became Southern Gentleman


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Default Re: This Day in History: November 22 in History - 11-23-2009, 03:34 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond View Post
Damned to hell on this date:
WOW that really IS a magic bullet!


#forevertrump: Supporter of The Donald as president-for-life! #MAGAlomaniac!
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Smile NOVEMBER 23 IN HISTORY (This day in History) - 11-23-2009, 12:17 PM

NOVEMBER 23 is:

Feast of Qawl (Bahá'í Faith). No I don't know what a Qawl is, but it's probably some disgusting camel body part.

Alexander Nevsky's feast day (Russian Orthodox Church). An army of Germans died due to walking on thin ice, and this loser took all the credit. Story repeats in 1812 and 1941. Note to Ivan: living in a frozen hellhole does not make you a heroic warrior. Living in a frozen hellhole means you're an idiot.

St George's Day (Georgia). This is the nation of Georgia, not the State of Georgia, which would never stoop to celebrating Libyan Catholic.

Rudolf Maister Day (Slovenia). No, I don't know who he is either. Anybody who was named after a reindeer must be too pathetic to be worth knowing about.

Pope Clement I (Roman Catholic Calendar of Saints). A huge plagerist, credited for epistles he didn't write. His miracle is that he went to where a goat was, and found water there. That's right, Catholics can't tell the difference between water and goat urine. Tossed an anchor into the ocean while still holding the rope, drowned, is burning in HELL.

NOVEMBER 23 IN HISTORY:

2005 – Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf, elected president of Liberia, is the first woman to lead an African country. You weren't missing out on anything, folks.

1996 - Irebe Skliva, 18, of Greece, crowned 46th Miss World. It's easy to keep your virgin beauty in a country filled with homosexuals.
Quote:
Proof that prayer works. She won even though she's ugly.
1996 – How wimpy are Italians? So wimpy they've been defeated by the Ethiopians, twice. How wimpy are Ethiopians? So wimpy that Ethiopian Airlines Flight 961 was sucessfully highjacked by 3 drunks armed with a bottle of liquor.
Quote:
The predictable result. Don't drink and fly, kids. Better yet, just don't let negros fly.
1991 - Death-metal rocker Freddie Mercury admits that God has smitted him with AIDS as punishment for his homosexuality.

1981 – Ronald Reagan signs the top secret National Security Decision Directive 17 (NSDD-17), giving the Central Intelligence Agency the authority to recruit and support Contra freedom commandos in Nicaragua.

1980 – God sends a series of earthquakes to kill 4,800 kitten-killing catholics in southern Italy.

1979 – More proof that Catholic prayers go unanswered: Provisional Irish Republican Army member Thomas McMahon is sentenced to life in prison for the assassination of Lord Mountbatten.

1970: Pope Paul VI issues a decree barring cardinals over the age of 80 from voting for a new pope, in direct violation of the 10 commandments ("respect your elders" - God) Why do Catholics want to take the vote away from the Elderly? Probably because men over 80 aren't horny enough to support the vatican's pro-pedophillia policy.

1963 – While Kennedy's head is being stuffed with sawdust and stitched together for the funeral, the BBC broadcasts the first ever episode of "some of the sickest, most horrible material...teatime brutality for tots" according to Mary Whitehouse (see ascended to heaven, below). Also known as Doctor Who, this orgy of anti-Biblical tentacle porn has become the world's longest science fiction show.

1958 - Ronald & Nancy Reagan appear together in the "GE Theatre" production of "A Turkey for President".

1947: E. L. Sukenik of Jerusalem's Hebrew University first receives word of the existence of the Dead Sea Scrolls

1946 – Hai Phong, Viet Nam: French Navy Heavy Cruiser Suffren pacifies 6,000 Buddhist and Catholic commies. Hai Phong is located on the Red River, proof that God has a sense of humor. Hell's maw opens wide, ready to dish out a lot more red rivers of "suffren".
Quote:
The French heavy Cruiser Suffren, a shining sword of righteousness.
1941 - Port Darwin bombed. The only Western city to be bombed by the Japanese in WW2 was named after DARWIN. Coincidence? Or is God trying to tell us something?

1940 – World War II: Romania joins the first Axis of Evil. Are used as cannon fodder. A sad nadir for the nation that produced Christianity's finest anti-Muslim crusader, Vlad "the impaler" Tepes.

1934 – An Anglo-Ethiopian boundary commission in the Ogaden discovers an Italian garrison at Walwal, which lay well within Ethiopian territory. In less than a decade the wops will flee Ethiopia for the second time - and this was before Ethiopians had obtained weaponized liquor bottle technology.

1921 - American doctors forbidden from prescribing beer.

1917 - Judicial Activism tramples over States Rights: Supreme Court strikes down Louisville, Kentucky ordinance requiring blacks & whites to live in separate residential areas.

1910 – Sweden carries out its last execution. Sweden has been overrun by crime and lawlessness ever since.

1903 – Colorado Governor James Peabody sends the state militia and 60,000 rounds of ammunition into the town of Cripple Creek to break up a miners' strike. 600 union workers are taken into custody in a military bullpen for weeks without charges. When a lawyer appears with a writ of habeas corpus, the General says, (quote) "Habeas corpus, hell! We'll give 'em post mortems!"

1888 - Harpo Marx born, starting Marxism's reigh of terror.

1863 – War of Yankee Aggression: Battle of Chattanooga begins.

1654: French mathematician Blaise Pascal undergoes a profound religious conversion. He thereupon abandoned his study of science, having realized that "the Christian religion obliges us to live only for God, and to have no other aim than him."

1584 - English parliment throws out Jesuits. A good start.

1334 - God pre-emptively punishes Holland for pot legalization with a flood.

1248 – Conquest of Seville by the Christian troops under King Ferdinand III of Castile. Suck it, Muslims!

1170 B.C. - First recorded strike for better working conditions and pay takes place in Egypt, by laborers too lazy to build a simple pyramid. How lazy can they get? It's just a triangle!

DAMNED TO HELL ON NOVEMBER 23:

2005 – Constance Cummings, actress. Obviously working in porn, just look at her name.

1996 – Art Porter, Jr., American jungle-music jazz pusher.

1902 – Walter Reed, bacteriologist. An admitted germunist, he supported the germ theory of disease, which disagrees with the Biblically-accurate Intelligent Smiting.

ASCENDED TO HEAVEN ON NOVEMBER 23:

2001 – Mary Whitehouse: crusader against smut on television. Starting in 1963 she targeted the director-general of the BBC, because he was "more than anybody else [...] responsible for the moral collapse in this country". Her crowning achievement: Starting a lawsuit that had a gay poet jailed 9 months for Blasphemy.

1997 – Jorge Más Canosa: anti-Castro freedom commando. The man who bombed Cubana Flight 455, hotels and nightclubs in 1997, said his activities were directly supported by Jorge Mas Canosa.


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Default Re: NOVEMBER 23 IN HISTORY (This day in History) - 11-24-2009, 06:02 AM

NOVEMBER 24TH IS:

United States: Thanksgiving is on this day every so many years. So many victories over injun villages to commemorate that the date has to be shared.

NOVEMBER 24TH IN HISTORY:

1993 -- End of world, according to Ukrainian sect White Brotherhood. It probably felt that way, due to their vodka hangover from Alexander Nevsky's feast day (Nov 23nd).

1992 – A China Southern Airlines domestic flight crashes, killing all 141 heathen buddhists and confusionists on board. More proof of God's wrath.

1979 -- US Federal government admits troops in Vietnam were exposed to the Agent Orange, which is harmless to those who pray.

1974 – Ethiopia: During a particularily vivid LSD trip, EVILutionists Donald Johanson and Tom Gray kill an underage prostitute, then mess with the bones to create false evidence of a monkey-woman they name "Lucy" after The Beatles song "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds", a song about the hallusinations that occur while on LSD. Realizing that the drug-soaked name won't fool anyone, they rename their fraud "Australopithecus afarensis".

1969 – According to believers in the Moon Hoax, The Apollo 12 lands in the Pacific Ocean, ending the second manned mission to the Moon. Of course, nobody went to the moon (but Jesus) and the event was actually filmed in a large swimming pool at an all-gay resort in Thailand. With attention focused on the spectacle, the conspirators order patriotic hero Lt. William L. Calley to stand trial by court martial for pacifying My Lai, Vietnam.

"Our mission in My Lai wasn't perverted, though. It was simply 'Go and destroy it;. Remember the Bible: the Amalekites? God said to Saul, 'Now go . . . and utterly destroy all that they have, and spare them not; but slay both man and woman, infant and suckling, ox and sheep, camel and ass. [1 Samuel 15:3] But the people took the spoil -' and God punished them. No difference now..." - Lt. William L. Calley [/quote]

1966 - God sends a "killer smog" to punish Jew York City. 400 die. Jews dieing - it's a gas!

1966 – God's wrath also smites a Bulgarian plane with 82 people on board crashes near Bratislava, Czechoslovakia. The word "Bugger" comes from "Bulgar", who are infamous for their love of anal sex.

1965 – Anti-communist hero Joseph Désiré Mobutu, seizes power in the Congo. He starts a 30-year golden age of tortured and allegedly semi-eaten communists that was worth every penny of the $5,000,000,000 USD he embezzled.

Quote:
Pimp fashion wasn't always bad. Mobutu is the one leaning on the "crip" stick. Mobutu was a friend and business partner of Pat Robertson and several Republican presidents, including Nixon, George H.W. Bush and Reagan, who called him "a voice of good sense and goodwill". He didn't get along with Carter.
Who says Republicans don't like black people?
I'm sorry, but the guy is just so photogenic I can't stop!
1963 – Newly sworn-in US President Lyndon B. Johnson confirms that he will stay the course in Vietnam.

1953 - Joe McCarthy declares Truman administration "crawling with communists."

1941 – Tax and Spend Roosevelt grants Lend-Lease to the Free French. They call themselves the free french because they love freebies.

1940 – Slovakia joins the Axis Powers, probably due to a post-Rudolph's Day hangover (see yesterday). Ohhhh, I'm so scared. Yesterday Romania joined, now Slovakia, what's next, Lietchenstien? People were such wimps to be afraid of the first Axis of Evil, it was nothing compared to the one we face today.

1932 – In Washington, D.C., the FBI Scientific Crime Detection Laboratory (better known as the FBI Crime Lab) officially opens under the command of a cross-dresser. Yet crime has only gotten worse - proof that science is a failure.

1922 – Author and Irish Republican Army member Robert Erskine Childers is executed. Proof that God does not hear the prayers of Catholics.

1898 – The International Conference of Rome for the Social Defense Against Anarchists opens. Among the resolutions was laws against possesing explosives. That's right, it was the first NWO order plot to destroy the Second Amendment.

1863 – War of Northern Aggression: Battle of Lookout Mountain

1826 - Where's an abortionist when you need one? Carlo Collodi, born. Author of Pinochio, a robot that has a nasal erection with each lie. Disgusting robosexual pornography.

Quote:
Beastiality and nasal sex at the same time! Sick!
1703 - In Philadelphia, German born pastor and hymnwriter Justus Falckner, 31, became the first Lutheran clergyman to be ordained in America.

1656 -- East Hampton, Long Island, abolishes the renting of land to injuns, and forbids wigwams to be set up in town without permission. Why should we allow people to settle on OUR land?

1639 – Jeremiah Horrocks observes the transit of Venus, an event he had predicted. He is burning in hell for committing astrology.

1429 – Joan of Arc unsuccessfully besieges La Charité. Should have stayed in the kitchen, cooking those frog's legs!

DAMNED TO HELL ON NOVEMBER 24:

2002 – John Rawls, political philosopher. Given a medal by Clinton. Now he's being waterboarded with molten metal in HELL.

1991 – Eric Carr, drummer of KISS (Knights In Satan's Service). His replacement drummer is suffering from breast cancer. God is sending a message!

1985 – Big Joe Turner, co-inventor of Rock n Roll.

1957 – Diego Rivera, Mexican painter. My retard kid scribbles better than this guy.

1807 -- Thayendanegea, a.k.a. Joseph Brant. Savage injun.

1615 – Sethus Calvisius, German calendar reformer. If his calendar is so great, why is it only Thanksgiving today on irregular years?

ASCENDED TO HEAVEN ON NOVEMBER 24TH:

1987 – Jehane Benoît, French Canadian culinary author. Anyone who ditches frog's legs in favor of poutine, maple syrup and sugar-pies is a friend of mine, surrender monkey or not. Wives take note!

1967 – Louis Fratto, Des Moines local, successful businessman. Known for ignoring statist regulations, which has caused him to be falsely labeld a gangster.

1963 – Lee Harvey Oswald, Famed for carrying out the death sentence of traitor John F. Kennedy.

1916 – Sir Hiram Stevens Maxim, American-born gunsmith.
Quote:
"Whatever happens, we have got: The Maxim gun, and they have not"

Quote:
Battle of Omdurman:

10,000 dead muslims, 48 dead in British service (mostly Egyptians).

Kill ratio: 200:1
Before Maxim's invention, 100:1 kill ratios in favor of Western Armies were unheard of. Now it's a "quagmire" the moment the kill ratio falls to 20:1.


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