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Default Irish poop wizard jailed! - 10-20-2011, 05:41 PM
In a fairly standard news story for Ireland, a drunken Popish leprechaun terrorist was jailed today for attempting to turn his own faeces into gold:
Quote:
A Northern Ireland man who tried to turn his own faeces into gold by putting it on an electric heater has been jailed for three months.
The bizarre experiment, carried out by Paul Moran, 30, caused around £3,000 worth of damage to his Housing Executive home in a block of flats at Derrin Park in Enniskillen in July.
Upon his release he will spend a further 12 months on licence.
Moran admitted arson and endangering the lives of others.
His Honour Judge McFarland told him: “Rather bizarrely you were attempting to make gold from human faeces and waste products.
“It was an interesting experiment to fulfil the alchemist’s dream, but wasn’t going to succeed.”
While outlining the circumstances of the case at Enniskillen Magistrates Court, prosecuting counsel Robin Steer, told those present that at 7.12pm on July 24 last year the Fire Brigade was called to Moran’s flat at Derrin Park in Cornagrade, Enniskillen.
A police officer who was at the scene overheard Moran tell someone he had put “fertiliser” on a heater.
It's good to see that the drunken potato-buggering micks aren't just turning a blind eye to this kind of very serious crime, but they're still not enforcing the punishment that GOD commands:

Exodus 22:18 Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.

Leviticus 20:27 A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them.

Deuteronomy 18:10 There shall not be found among you any one that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire, or that useth divination, or an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch.
11 Or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer.

O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Irish poop wizard jailed! - 10-20-2011, 05:49 PM
Yet again we see what happens when superstitious beliefs that some sort of magic is going to intervene to give an earthly reward is given its head. Just what did this crazy fool think was going to intervene on his behalf and affect his poop?


Isaiah 34:6 The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness, and with the blood of lambs and goats, with the fat of the kidneys of rams: for the LORD hath a sacrifice in Bozrah, and a great slaughter in the land of Idumea.

John 5:46,47 For had ye believed Moses, ye would have believed me: for he wrote of me. But if ye believe not his writings, how shall ye believe my words?

Join me in scoffing at backwards Muslims clinging to their beliefs in the face of the evidence!
The truth about volcanos
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Default Re: Irish poop wizard jailed! - 10-20-2011, 07:07 PM
While it's true that the Bible commands us at times to burn the poop of animals (Exodus 29:14, Numbers 19:5, etc.), I can't recall an instance where He tells us to burn our OWN poop.

C'mon, that would be retarded!



YiC,

Zech

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Default Re: Irish poop wizard jailed! - 10-20-2011, 08:03 PM
Catholics. Heck, if they believe they can turn wine into blood, and bread into flesh, is it such a stretch that they believe they can turn poop into gold?
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Default Re: Irish poop wizard jailed! - 10-21-2011, 03:44 AM
I'm pretty sure this is a clear case of Necromancy. God hates it.

Quote:

Dt.18:10-11
There shall not be found among you any one ... that useth divination, or an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch. Or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer.

Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Irish poop wizard jailed! - 10-21-2011, 01:33 PM
well, that's downright funny as can be! sounds like a punchline to a joke. whatchu call an Irishmin what's trying to turn feces into gold? an alchemick! and the paddys name is Moran? too perfect, praise Christ!


Genesis 1:24
And God said, "Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals, each according to its kind: and it was so."
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Default Re: Irish poop wizard jailed! - 10-21-2011, 05:55 PM
I bet you the m0ron Moran kept a diarrhoea of events.

Matthew 10:34
Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Cool Re: Irish poop wizard jailed! - 07-17-2012, 11:45 AM
You do know you are being Racist to the Irish , And If an irishmans name is mormon, then an American's must be Nurotic
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Default Re: Irish poop wizard jailed! - 07-17-2012, 11:47 AM
Quote:
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You do know you are being Racist to the Irish , And If an irishmans name is mormon, then an American's must be Nurotic
Since when are the Irish a race? Are you drunk right now?
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Default Re: Irish poop wizard jailed! - 07-17-2012, 04:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Destiny's Blunder View Post
Since when are the Irish a race? Are you drunk right now?
Sometimes I wonder how you unsaved trash even manage to find threads that are this old.

The story in this thread is a good reminder why children should be kept away from the Dungeons and Dragons, but really, there are more recent examples.


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- Proverbs 15:3

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Default Re: Irish poop wizard jailed! - 07-18-2012, 01:59 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob4God View Post
Sometimes I wonder how you unsaved trash even manage to find threads that are this old.

The story in this thread is a good reminder why children should be kept away from the Dungeons and Dragons, but really, there are more recent examples.
Do they magically turn poo into gold in Dungeons and Dragqueens?

If it were that easy, just think of the hyperinflation we'd face!

Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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