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Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum A Christian Help Forum led by Sister Daisy Mae Johnson. Warning! Sometimes the Lord's advice is a hard pill to swallow.

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Default I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 02:45 AM

Hay guise,

I am a homosexual. I like kissing boys. I cut my wrists everyday because God tells me to do it, it's the voices in my head. I <3 to bleed on everything when I cut my wrists, it's satisfying. I have scene hair, and I'm a scene kid. I <3 all you men out there. */slyce* Oh wow, it's a gusher fellas.
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 02:52 AM

If you're gonna cut yourself, then do it right. Not down the highway. Not across the train tracks. Straight through the jugular. If you're not gonna be a decent human being, then at least commit suicide right.

My theory is that emo kids, aren't smart enough to effectively kill themselves, so they just pretend like they could if they wanted to. Either way, I look at them with the same disdain as people who actually commit suicide. Stop being foolish, and find God.


Make a joyful noise unto the Lord...not a pitch perfect, melodic, musically correct noise...just joyful.
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 02:54 AM

Hello, Cutman, and welcome to Landover Baptist Church. After you have bound up your wrist, please take a moment to review the following list. If any of the items on it are in your possession, I strongly urge that you rid yourself of them immediately:

American Indian artifacts (dreamcatchers, etc.), carvings, pictures

East Indian items
Paisley pattern on anything
Items from other countries, especially Africa, China, Japan
Statues/pictures of false gods/goddesses (Buddha, Krishna, et al.)
Frogs, owls, hearts, unicorns, angels, dolphins, rainbows, dragons, horseshoes
Dolls and stuffed animals (dolls originated in voodoo)
Items of clothing named after pagan idols or gods/goddesses (e.g., Nike is a Greek goddess)
Pictures of movie stars/other celebrities
Some items passed down from ancestors (the ancestor may have been cursed)
Shamrocks, clovers or any kind of good luck charm
Any items used in witchcraft
The Book of Mormon
The Satanic Bible
Any "Christian" bible other than the English King James Version 1611 (KJV1611)
Books on other religions
Rock and roll music, jazz music, etc.
Flamingos, sundials, books/tapes from false (i.e., non-Deliverance) religions
Ankhs, astrological symbols, peace symbols, tikis, Italian horns (cornutos)
Stars, wishbones, incense, fleurs-de-lis

Thank you, and I hope your time with us is blessed.


Mark 16:17 And these attesting signs will accompany those who believe: in My Name they will drive out demons.

1 Kings 21:14 Then they sent to Jezebel, saying, Naboth is stoned . . .

A SPIRITUAL WARFARE PRAYER:
Father, In Jesus' Name, I take the Blood of Jesus and break the power of all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, wiccans, pagans, and any other source, and all of their rituals off of us. With the Blood of Jesus, I erase all evil lines drawn on our liver. . .

LANDOVER BAPTIST DEMON HUNTING PERMIT #00666-27





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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 02:55 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by madguitarist View Post
If you're gonna cut yourself, then do it right. Not down the highway. Not across the train tracks. Straight through the jugular. If you're not gonna be a decent human being, then at least commit suicide right.

My theory is that emo kids, aren't smart enough to effectively kill themselves, so they just pretend like they could if they wanted to. Either way, I look at them with the same disdain as people who actually commit suicide. Stop being foolish, and find God.
I love going down the highway! =D A/S/L madguitarist?
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Baphomet Baphomet is offline
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 02:55 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by madguitarist View Post
If you're gonna cut yourself, then do it right. Not down the highway. Not across the train tracks. Straight through the jugular. If you're not gonna be a decent human being, then at least commit suicide right.

My theory is that emo kids, aren't smart enough to effectively kill themselves, so they just pretend like they could if they wanted to. Either way, I look at them with the same disdain as people who actually commit suicide. Stop being foolish, and find God.
Praise Jebus!
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 02:59 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Justina Thyme View Post
Hello, Cutman, and welcome to Landover Baptist Church. After you have bound up your wrist, please take a moment to review the following list. If any of the items on it are in your possession, I strongly urge that you rid yourself of them immediately:

American Indian artifacts (dreamcatchers, etc.), carvings, pictures
East Indian items
Paisley pattern on anything
Items from other countries, especially Africa, China, Japan
Statues/pictures of false gods/goddesses (Buddha, Krishna, et al.)
Frogs, owls, hearts, unicorns, angels, dolphins, rainbows, dragons, horseshoes
Dolls and stuffed animals (dolls originated in voodoo)
Items of clothing named after pagan idols or gods/goddesses (e.g., Nike is a Greek goddess)
Pictures of movie stars/other celebrities
Some items passed down from ancestors (the ancestor may have been cursed)
Shamrocks, clovers or any kind of good luck charm
Any items used in witchcraft
The Book of Mormon
The Satanic Bible
Any "Christian" bible other than the English King James Version 1611 (KJV1611)
Books on other religions
Rock and roll music, jazz music, etc.
Flamingos, sundials, books/tapes from false (i.e., non-Deliverance) religions
Ankhs, astrological symbols, peace symbols, tikis, Italian horns (cornutos)
Stars, wishbones, incense, fleurs-de-lis

Thank you, and I hope your time with us is blessed.
I have a Gay Bible, is that ok sweetie?
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Glendora Christianson Glendora Christianson is offline
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:00 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cutman View Post
Hay guise,

I am a homosexual. I like kissing boys. I cut my wrists everyday because God tells me to do it, it's the voices in my head. I <3 to bleed on everything when I cut my wrists, it's satisfying. I have scene hair, and I'm a scene kid. I <3 all you men out there. */slyce* Oh wow, it's a gusher fellas.
Sweet Baby Jesus! I assume you have never had a proper Christian spanking. No son of mine would dare to kiss a boy. And this cutting stuff is just a childish way to get attention. Ten licks from my favorite hairbrush per cut will take care of that problem!
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
Sweet Baby Jesus! I assume you have never had a proper Christian spanking. No son of mine would dare to kiss a boy. And this cutting stuff is just a childish way to get attention. Ten licks from my favorite hairbrush per cut will take care of that problem!
You play grab ass with your kids?! That's SOOOOOOO KEWL! My parents died of cancer by the way, when I was 7.
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:06 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cutman View Post
You play grab ass with your kids?! That's SOOOOOOO KEWL! My parents died of cancer by the way, when I was 7.
What did you do that God was so angry with you that He killed your' parents?

Jesus loves you deeply friend, don't make Him kill more of your family.



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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:08 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
What did you do that God was so angry with you that He killed your' parents?
Actually, Satan made them explode in Iraq while they were in the war.
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:08 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cutman View Post
You play grab ass with your kids?! That's SOOOOOOO KEWL! My parents died of cancer by the way, when I was 7.
Both your parents died at the same time from cancer? Something tells me you're trying to make a mockery of Jesus' Love and Compassion.


Let Jesus Christ Wash You Clean
in 2016

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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:12 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by VictoryOS View Post
Both your parents died at the same time from cancer? Something tells me you're trying to make a mockery of Jesus' Love and Compassion.
I know right? It was a VEEEERRRY weird event.
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:12 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by VictoryOS View Post
Both your parents died at the same time from cancer? Something tells me you're trying to make a mockery of Jesus' Love and Compassion.
both my parents died too. my daddy died in iraq and my mum commited suicide. i live with foster parents and they are so dark. i am tryin to find jesus...
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:14 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cutman View Post
I know right? It was a VEEEERRRY weird event.
Please tell us about it.


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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:15 AM

My pastor touches me in the pants on Fridays and Sundays. Sundays are pretty CRAZY! He said I would lose my fag appeal if I let him. =D
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:16 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cutman View Post
My parents died of cancer by the way, when I was 7.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cutman View Post
Actually, Satan made them explode in Iraq while they were in the war.
Hmmm... that takes the bisquit eh.

Mocking us gets you nowhere and upsets Baby Jesus friend.

Exodus 13:17
And it came to pass, when Pharaoh had let the people go, that God led them not through the way of the land of the Philistines, although that was near; for God said, Lest peradventure the people repent when they see war, and they return to Egypt:


Psalm 81:10:
I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:17 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JimmyB View Post
i live with foster parents
So you are from Australia?


Psalm 81:10:
I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:19 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cutman View Post
I know right? It was a VEEEERRRY weird event.
Quote:
Originally Posted by VictoryOS View Post
Please tell us about it.
First my dad had pancreatic cancer, we don't know how he got it. He died first, he was in pain for 14 months. My mother then fell to cancer. My mother then died of lung cancer; she wasn't a smoker she got it from second hand smoke; her friends smoked a lot. She died 3 weeks after my dad. She was in pain for 12 months.
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:22 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cutman View Post
My pastor touches me in the pants on Fridays and Sundays. Sundays are pretty CRAZY! He said I would lose my fag appeal if I let him. =D
omg! same here! my foster parents make me go to a catholic church and the priest touches me! he told me if i told anyone i would go to hell!


and yes. wideopen. i am from australia.
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Default Re: I'm an emo kid - 05-09-2008, 03:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wide-Open View Post
Hmmm... that takes the bisquit eh.

Mocking us gets you nowhere and upsets Baby Jesus friend.

Exodus 13:17
And it came to pass, when Pharaoh had let the people go, that God led them not through the way of the land of the Philistines, although that was near; for God said, Lest peradventure the people repent when they see war, and they return to Egypt:
Cutting my wrists gets me down the highway. A/S/L Wide Open?
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