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MEET CHRISTIAN SINGLES! Who knows? The love of your life might be here! All the single men are GODLY and all the single ladies are virgins...........for the most part.

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Glendora Christianson's Avatar
Glendora Christianson Glendora Christianson is offline
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Glendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples - 09-16-2006, 07:46 PM

There is a big difference between secular personals and Christian personals. And I thought it might be a good idea for us to post a few bad examples, courtesy of the secular world. Anyway, I found a particularly disgusting ad on that very smutty craigslist.org. Feel free to ad more bad ads for educational purposes. Thanks, Mother Glynndie

Young Surfer Boy ISO Hot Straight Couple - m4mw - hello,
What a great day it is! I already got some surf in this morning and now I want to have some hot and wild fun with a HOT STRAIGHT COUPLE at my place or yours ASAP! I am 5'9", very athletic and lean body, 150lbs, a few tats, short light brown hair, very little body hair, smooth young skin, a clean,well kept and groomed 8 inch long and 2 inch thick circumsized xxxx. I posted some pics below, if you are interested send me yours and we'll take it from there..


Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.
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SUV's Avatar
SUV SUV is offline
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Have at it, anytime!

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SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default 09-16-2006, 08:12 PM

(Uhhh....Mother Glynndie! Mother Glynndie! Have you seen BRIAN PEPPERS/Li'l Davey/Carnie Guy around here anywhere?)

SUV
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Default 09-16-2006, 09:42 PM

I ran across this one once;

Divorced White Male, 54 5’2” 275lbs bald.
Seeks single while female 18-30, blonde and big breasts a plus.
Stable employment status and NO law enforcement connections are must if you want to run with me baby. As you can see a hot item like me will be going so ladies so get you reply in soon.
No smokers please.



Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

Hot Must ReadThreads!


Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Default 09-16-2006, 11:14 PM

Do you meant this guy dear Sister?



Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Sue Vera View Post
(Uhhh....Mother Glynndie! Mother Glynndie! Have you seen BRIAN PEPPERS/Li'l Davey/Carnie Guy around here anywhere?)

SUV




Tweet me Here
My GODLY Bio Here
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SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!SUV will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default 09-16-2006, 11:18 PM

Oh my GOD! What is it about that little Man that simply tears the Heart Right out of my chestal areas?

(As always, I kept my eyes averted from that Vulgar bulge coming from that pair of britches to the left of him. Jesus know I did!!!)

SUV
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Default 09-17-2006, 05:33 AM

I once saw this personal ad in a secular newspaper in Memphis:

Quote:
I don't exept ignorant people!

My name is Angela. I am attractiveseriouse, tender, polite, romantic lady. I love music, travel, books, flowers, good company. I have traditional view at the family. I am looking for kind, relaible, considerate, intellectual gentleman who love a children and valye a family life. The man of my dream is tall( 5'10" and more), strong,gentle, loving, understanding.
Probably educated in public school.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Ixi's Avatar
Ixi Ixi is offline
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Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
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Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default 09-17-2006, 11:59 PM

what makes you think she went to a public school?
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Default 09-18-2006, 12:18 AM

The fact that she is such a dunce and cannot convey a simple THOUGHT?
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Ixi Ixi is offline
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Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Ixi is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default 09-18-2006, 01:01 AM

I think she seemed sweet.
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Default 09-18-2006, 01:44 AM

She seemed like the typical worldly WHORE seeking as many pee pee's in her woman-parts. Lucky for her, Satan is ready at a moment's notice.
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A very nice young man
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Default 09-19-2006, 12:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Angela View Post
I am looking for kind, relaible, considerate, intellectual gentleman who love a children...
In other words, her idea of a good time is a threesome involving a Catholic priest and a 12-year old polack.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ixi
I think she seemed sweet.
Sorry, not even whores like that go for emo queers like yourself.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Glendora Christianson Glendora Christianson is offline
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Long service medal, 1st class One Year/1000 posts True Christian™ Saved 5 Years True Christian Lady Real American™ Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls Ribfest '03 Best stoning bucket Protected by JESUS Christian Love Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Mama Grizzly Persecuted

 
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Glendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureGlendora Christianson has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Dear Lord, I Found a Doozey! - 10-02-2006, 02:32 AM

Folks, please don't read on, unless you are very sure about your own personal salvation. I can't believe what qualifies as a personal ad in the sexular world! DISTURBED MOTHER GLENDORA

I need 1 or 2 women to FXXX me with a strap on!! - m4ww - 26

i need 1 or 2 women who want to Fxxx a young guy with a strap-on...

id get a nice hotel room, supply the "tools"

you just show up ready to make me sxxx and fxxx your rubber cxxx...

i am a good looking athletic grad student...have played with toys but my axx is still virgin territory so be the first...bring a friend if you want to tag team me...

hoping to do this soon...


Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.
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Hushed_Agony Hushed_Agony is offline
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Hushed_Agony has had a couple of people click the rep button.Hushed_Agony has had a couple of people click the rep button.Hushed_Agony has had a couple of people click the rep button.Hushed_Agony has had a couple of people click the rep button.
Default Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples - 10-05-2006, 06:42 PM

Lumberjack seeks companion

Must be able to supply your own chain lube. A 18" bar is most acceptable.
I am a hard starter, but once pulled, I fire right up.
No wood to big to conquer, no sapplings allowed.
Would prefer dressed in flannels and a unionsuit. (That buttflap is so sexy)
Can you get my motor started?
Instead of knocking the wood down, let's bring it up
call me at XXX-XXX-XXXX

Remind me to hide not in the trees, but somewhere far far away from this filth.


And ye shall tread down the wicked; for they shall be ashes under the soles of your feet in the day that I shall do this, saith the Lord of hosts. Malachi 4.3

Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
Pslams 51:7
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Daisy Mae Johnson Daisy Mae Johnson is offline
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Default Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples - 10-05-2006, 07:01 PM

Tinkerbell Seeking Hook Tired of unfaithful Peters. 45, 5'2/115, auburn brown-wide eyes IMP. Ready for the Hook. Save me! I still believe.

Lost Boys need not apply.




what a filthy, wanton slut...I winced when I read that ad.




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Talitha's Avatar
Talitha Talitha is offline
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Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
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Default Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples - 10-11-2006, 10:12 AM

I don't know if I understood this Thread.....

But I'm Posting anyway.

Kitty Fiddling should be against the Law!!

Name:  SPCA.jpg
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Sister Talitha

Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Glendora Christianson's Avatar
Glendora Christianson Glendora Christianson is offline
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Default Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples - 10-11-2006, 12:46 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Talitha View Post
I don't know if I understood this Thread.....

But I'm Posting anyway.
Kitty Fiddling should be against the Law!!

Attachment 191
That kitty fiddler belongs behind bars, just like this one:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mvu1A...related&search=


Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.
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Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

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Default Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples - 10-11-2006, 12:55 PM

...All of which just supports the notion that cats are a legitimate food source...


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Mrs. Rogers's Avatar
Mrs. Rogers Mrs. Rogers is offline
compassion personified
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Default Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples - 10-12-2006, 03:13 AM

Good GRIEF ... this is most disturbing; the occasional use of Hitoshi's engrish is very suspect indeed.

Quote:
Imp and angel. Disembodied head in jar, 24, seeks pixie goddess to fiddle with while Rome burns. You bring marshmallows. No. I make joke. You like laugh? I like comebacks and confessions. Send photo of someone else.


True Christians are Perfect!

Signs that you belong to a FALSE Christian Church.

Persecution You Have Endured for CHRIST: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger in Christ.

For True Christians™ only: please send me Project Habakkuk updates at gertruderogers@landoverbaptist.net. Thank you.
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Fish's Avatar
Fish (On Moderation) Fish is offline
Muttonheaded homer -- very confused young man
On the point of being banned for lying and libel
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Fish is fearful, unbelieving, a liar, a whoremonger, and abominable. Has a place in the Lake of Fire secured.
Default Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples - 10-12-2006, 06:25 AM

I have a genius idea to you so called True Christians™: Stop surfing the personal ads! That way you won't be offended so easily!
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Talitha's Avatar
Talitha Talitha is offline
Deaconess
Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Long service medal, 3rd class Real American™ Gunfest '08 Cleanest Kitchen Platinum Tither True Christian Lady True Christian Provider™ award Best stoning bucket Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Christian Love Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient Born again virgin Persecuted Pro-Life TC Bravery Ex-Brit True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Long service medal, 2nd class Early riser Touched by Jesus Donald Trump 2016! Pastor Ezekiel Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years

 
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Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples - 10-12-2006, 10:39 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fish View Post
I have a genius idea to you so called True Christians™: Stop surfing the personal ads! That way you won't be offended so easily!
Indeed Mr Kipper, it would be a good idea were it not for the fact that God© commands us to seek out such things and warn each other about them.



Sister Talitha

Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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