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  • Marijuana Makes You Gay

    Brothers,

    Praise Christ that True Christians™ are never tempted by the Devil's weed!

    The results are in from Landover University. A carefully controlled double blind study in which half of the 20 male participants smoked oregano and the other half cannibis, a Schedule I narcotic.

    The prinicpal finding of the study is that ingestion of THC, in any amount, lowers your inhibitions and self control. Men normally adverse to immoral conduct threw their conscience out the window after a bong hit.

    In short, 100 percent of the uninhibited men that were stoned engaged in either autofellatio or sodomy. All ten men regretted the experience the next day. Most are in counseling and being tested for AIDS and rectumosis. They universally agree that it was marijuana that lead to the depravity and would not have engaged in such filth if not under the influence.

    Praise Jesus Christ for the War on Drugs!
    Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."

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  • #2
    Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

    Originally posted by Brother Harold Porter View Post
    In short, 100 percent of the uninhibited men that were stoned engaged in either autofellatio or sodomy.
    AUTOfellatio, Brother?

    Does the marijuana also enhance flexibility? Or something else . . .
    Bible boring? Nonsense!
    Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
    You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

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    • #3
      Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

      Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
      AUTOfellatio, Brother?

      Does the marijuana also enhance flexibility? Or something else . . .
      Reverend,

      This nasty substance doesn't actually increase flexibility. But one thing our study found is that, as proponents of its legalization suggest, it is a powerful anesthetic. Combined with the psychotic effect of suspending all morality, the over-articulation of the spine (that would normally be quite painful) is not an issue.

      To be clear though, self-service was only observed in the subjects that were alone. All subjects indicated that wicked sodomy was the overwhelming preference while under the influence of the Devil.

      Pray that this dangerous drug is completely eradicated!
      Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."

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      • #4
        Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

        Brothers in Christ,

        It is with a heavy heart that I disclose the clinical reports on the aftermath of the experiment.

        Sadly, all ten men that participated in wicked self-fornication or savaged the colons of other men have been infected with the AIDS and acute rectumosis. I was at first skeptical of the reports. How could self-copulation or being a power top put one at risk of the disease?

        As I gathered with the Sodomites in my office, they were in tears asking "why, why, why"? Of course, I turned to Scripture and quickly found the answer:

        "Wherefore doth a living man complain, a man for the punishment of his sins?" Lamentations 3:39 - KJV
        It is clear that God will righteously punish the gays with what they deserve.

        So Brothers, the next time a heathen friend suggests that marijuana is a "harmless" narcotic, point them to my study before they suffer the same fate as these once healthy young men. An hour of being under the influence of Satan's weed lead to ruined rectums, disease and a lifetime of despair. I asked them if it was worth it?

        I need to study the psychologists' reports before I can address the long term effects of cannibis-induced homosexuality.

        In Christ!
        Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."

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        • #5
          Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

          Originally posted by Brother Harold Porter View Post
          Brothers in Christ,

          It is with a heavy heart that I disclose the clinical reports on the aftermath of the experiment.

          Sadly, all ten men that participated in wicked self-fornication or savaged the colons of other men have been infected with the AIDS and acute rectumosis. I was at first skeptical of the reports. How could self-copulation or being a power top put one at risk of the disease?

          As I gathered with the Sodomites in my office, they were in tears asking "why, why, why"? Of course, I turned to Scripture and quickly found the answer:
          It is clear that God will righteously punish the gays with what they deserve.

          So Brothers, the next time a heathen friend suggests that marijuana is a "harmless" narcotic, point them to my study before they suffer the same fate as these once healthy young men. An hour of being under the influence of Satan's weed lead to ruined rectums, disease and a lifetime of despair. I asked them if it was worth it?

          I need to study the psychologists' reports before I can address the long term effects of cannibis-induced homosexuality.

          In Christ!
          You are a funny man ,Brother Harold Porter. The quote is not an answer. Its just a quote.

          I do not say cannabis and marihuana is without concern for your health, but it does not make you gay - just stoned.

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          • #6
            Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

            That's how they soften you up. (That's a euphemism).
            May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

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            • #7
              Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

              Originally posted by Nobar King View Post
              That's how they soften you up. (That's a euphemism).
              I have never been approached by a gay guy for sex, while stoned - what about you?

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              • #8
                Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

                Originally posted by Grapes View Post
                I have never been approached by a gay guy for sex, while stoned - what about you?
                You're not the only sample in the set. Lots of times you don't realize your friend is a homo and then they use the weed to make it easy to take advantage of you and turn you gay.

                What is good about that?

                Edit-- you must be a pretty ugly dude. Myself, I do my best to identify fags and stay away from them; I don't need that kind of attention.
                May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

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                • #9
                  Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

                  Originally posted by Nobar King View Post
                  You're not the only sample in the set. Lots of times you don't realize your friend is a homo and then they use the weed to make it easy to take advantage of you and turn you gay.

                  What is good about that?

                  Edit-- you must be a pretty ugly dude. Myself, I do my best to identify fags and stay away from them; I don't need that kind of attention.
                  You are not seroius Nobar. You just make things up, but its funny though.

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                  • #10
                    Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

                    Originally posted by Nobar King View Post
                    Edit-- you must be a pretty ugly dude. Myself, I do my best to identify fags and stay away from them; I don't need that kind of attention.
                    Well you would most likely turn gay if you met me Its not that hard to identify gays, but keep away frome them is your own choice. Gay may appreciate you kept away frome them.

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                    • #11
                      Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

                      Originally posted by Grapes View Post
                      I do not say cannabis and marihuana is without concern for your health, but it does not make you gay - just stoned.
                      In your case, marijuana would not make you gay because you are already a flaming bottom queen accustomed to foul sin with strange men every day, sober or under the influence. But our study has proven conclusively that men not already afflicted with gayness will certainly become rectum-ravaging Sodomites under the influence of this foul weed.

                      With God's grace, they will repent and their colons will heal. But the AIDS is their punishment from God and they must live the rest of their lives as the walking biohazard that they are.

                      You can be saved too if you come to Jesus. You'll always have the AIDS and likely need a permanent colostomy when your rectumosis becomes acute due to the constant abuse, but Jesus will love you anyway.

                      In Christ
                      Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."

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                      • #12
                        Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

                        Here is the other side effect of marijuana.


                        As bad as this it is gets WORSE!



                        Hellywood Liebrul and pot smoker Jack Nicholson looking for a few "good" men to sodomize!!


                        Here is what years of pot use can do!

                        Jesus loves Dick



                        Cheney/Palin 2012

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                        • #13
                          Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

                          Originally posted by TC Patriot View Post
                          Here is the other side effect of marijuana.

                          Bless you Brother Patriot!

                          I see the photos from the clinical study have already been leaked. I needed to get consent from our subject Juan Camacho (pictured) before I could comment.

                          As you know, we did exhaustive psychological workups on all subjects before and after the case study. Juan was one of our most complex personalities. He confided before the test that he was an atheist and had sinned when thinking of homosexual encounters in the past. But as with most sane men bound by law, he knew not to cross the line and actually live out his wicked fantasy.

                          Marijuana changed this and we are struggling to save his soul before it is too late.

                          But before we get to his depravity, it's important to address a few criticisms recently printed in the press.

                          First, of course no Christian men were involved in the study as there would be no point. No Christian man entertains homosexual thoughts and would never inhale marijuana, no matter what. Praise Jesus Christ!. To attempt to get a Christian man to participate in such a study would be as futile as attempting to herd cats; won't happen.

                          Second, the marijuana was obtained from the Freehold Police Department evidence locker, but only after the potheads arrested within our jurisdiction were convicted. No, we did not "sin" by purchasing "skunk" on the streets. But we were assured by detectives that this was some of the most potent marijuana available.

                          Third, yes "Jesus would agree" with our study. If we can save hundreds of thousands of foul sinners before they give their life over to Satan and Sodomy with our proof of "the first step to Hell", He would indeed approve. The alternative is much worse. Millions of drug addicted gays with AIDS that will never bother with His Word.

                          Back to Juan. Already entertaining wicked fantasies, he was eager to be the first to ingest THC. After the first "hit", he began gyrating his hips in his chair. After the second, he removed his pants. To make a long story short, it took just three applications of marijuana before he was on the carpet being willfully and repeatedly sodomized by the other subjects, with a smile on his face.

                          Juan is one of the few patients that we might lose. While most were remorseful for the daisy chain of sin, Juan insisted on Estrogen therapy and the result is what you see in the photograph. Pray that we can save him with Jesus Christ!

                          This is a very dangerous substance, Brothers. We plan phase two of the study next week to prove that unsaved women are just as susceptible to lesbanianism from marijuana as heathen men are to gayness.

                          In Christ
                          Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."

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                          • #14
                            Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

                            I know marijuana can cause gayness because I once met a gay and he was an avid pot smoker. So I'm a first-hand witness to this.


                            YES! I AM A CLOWN FOR CHRIST! Owner/Operator of Lord's Derisive Laughter Christian Clown Ministry.
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                            • #15
                              Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay

                              FYI, the Playtex Cross Your Heart bras are on sale at Wallyworld.

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