The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus. |
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 10
Join Date: Dec 2018
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Re: ATTENTION! -
12-02-2018, 04:05 AM
"Just a regular nice guy" a nice guy doesn't call someone a retard.
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True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
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Posts: 8,776
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Surrounded by heathens
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Re: ATTENTION! -
12-02-2018, 10:35 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemyholygod
ok lady that is my son he is the most beautiful child in the world and the most innocent god blessed me with him I can guarantee his heart is pure he has over come more in his life time than you can imagine so unless u understand him don't make judgement.
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Right, now I'm officially confused. Are you claiming this is your son?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
That's Bacchus/Dionysus you're thinking of, dear.
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Because that's some sort of toy, dear.
Or did you go crying to your mom and so she came and posted here under your username, pretending to be you? (If it was, I can see where you get the inability to punctuate and to capitalize the name of God from.) Or was that you pretending to be your own mom (along with lying by ticking the box about being over 18)?
You come on to our Church's private forum for the sole purpose of hurling mindless abuse at us and tell us that (a) God loves everyone (see Sister Basilissa's post) but that (b) we will burn in Hell. Inconsistent, to say the least. You then accuse us of being rude to you.
Idiot.
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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True Christian™ Just a Regular Nice Guy
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Posts: 29,835
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
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Re: ATTENTION! -
12-04-2018, 12:56 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemyholygod
"Just a regular nice guy" a nice guy doesn't call someone a retard.
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Is there a different word for retard? "gfhlkjsda" is hard to pronounce.
Just calling a spade a spade.
God sees everything and trying to call a pile of poo 'something special' is not pulling wool over His piercing eyes. He can smell too. There is no fooling Jesus.
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: ATTENTION! -
12-04-2018, 01:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemyholygod
ok lady that is my son he is the most beautiful child in the world and the most innocent god blessed me with him I can guarantee his heart is pure he has over come more in his life time than you can imagine so unless u understand him don't make judgement.
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First of all, this is NOT a debate forum. We're right and you're wrong, according to Jesus and the Holy Word of God. Please read THIS thread before making an even bigger fool of yourself.
Secondly, while the internets might seem to be "free" to you, this particular corner of the internets is a privately owned Christian forum. The rights you have on this forum are listed HERE. Please contact a Pastor immediately if you feel that any of your rights have been violated.
Finally, your unsaved opinions or tantrums are not even slightly of interest to us. We follow the Holy Word of God TO THE LETTER, and make no apologies for that. One of the most important commandments in the Bible tells us to avoid unsaved scum such as yourself. You wandered in here uninvited, and unwelcome .
If you want to debate people, THIS is the place to go.
Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.
And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.
I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,666
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
12-04-2018, 03:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemyholygod
I have seen far too much hatred against homosexuals and far too much racism on this site. people here claim to be true believers of god but instead spread filth on his holy name by spreading their hatred. these "god worshippers" blatantly call anyone who isn't a part of their site "unsaved trash". they show complete disregard for the emotions of others, if anyone will burn in hell it shall be these corrupt homophobic, racist, sexist individuals. they seem to think that they may call on god, bringer of merriment and good times not to mention love and life, two I greatly cherish by the way among the others of course, to hurt and bring dismay to others. the god I believe will always love no matter if your homosexual or bisexual, or if you are black, and he respects women. one day the evil men and women on this site, if they don't change their ways, will burn in the fires of hell. I love all people even the hateful because they can be saved. written by a white, democratic, god lover. god bless all of you reading and all of the people of this holy land gifted too us by our lord god and our sins forgiven by his seed jesus christe, in both of your names we pray, amen.
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Hi. I've read the posts in this thread and would like to know "which God" you're referring to. Very many false ideas have been made up by people and called gods but none of them are real. Satan has also deceived people, tricked them into worshipping him, and the things he's presented have been labelled as gods too.
None of those gods could ever do things like create the universe, as The Bible describes, which is how we distinguish falsehood from reality. What you're describing disagrees with The Bible and with God's message for us preserved in its pages.
I'd also like to know how you get your information about God before commenting further. Welcome to the forum, I'm sure if you clarify those two points we'll be able to share more about what God has told us and our daily walk with Him.
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,984
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
12-07-2018, 02:46 PM
Admin, I am formally requesting that you ban this user for failing to capitalize "God."
So disrespectful!
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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True Christian™ Just a Regular Nice Guy
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Posts: 29,835
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
12-07-2018, 04:19 PM
This behavior is so very typical of retards. They sign up here, all high and mighty on adderalll and thorazine then demand they are treated special. Then poof! Gone off to pick up a chunk of frozen dog doo-doo off of the ground and them give grandma a kiss goodnite while they try and cop a feel. Disgusting.
Honestly, if God had not commanded me to reach out to all beings with the Love of His Magnificent Graciousness™ I'd never give most the time of day.
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Forum Member
Forum Member
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Posts: 1,330
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: In the kitchen
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Re: ATTENTION! -
12-08-2018, 10:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemyholygod
"are you claiming the bible hate-based?" no just you, god loves all, and I do have autism, but it is gift enabling, stronger emotion and extensive intelligence and wisdom, along with amazing creativity. Thank you god!!!! I love you!!!! you all can get me perplexed sometimes. Perplexed, Being confused.
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Dear, your grammar reveals that your autism is interfering with your ability to write in English. First and foremost, you are not capitalizing the name of our Lord Jesus Christ and God and His Holy Word, the Bible. You see, in Proverbs 2:6, it says that Lord gives us wisdom, not autism which is a curse. I think you are perplexed, so I'm praying for your soul.
"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1
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Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance Christ's Rottweiler
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Posts: 22,744
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
12-09-2018, 01:14 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemyholygod
I have seen far too much hatred against homosexuals and far too much racism on this site.[...]
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I really don't think you have.
The Bible tells us to preach Gods Word to all creatures, and it is absolutely impossible to do this too much.
I suspect that your problem (and you do have a problem with God) is that you have never read a Bible, let alone His Word in KJV1611.
And yet, quite inexplicably, you come here shouting lies against Jesus - That's simply remarkable!
Do you think that you have a better understanding of God than we do? Really? Have you a magic decoding Ring given to you by God Himself? Are your facile, liberal, fluffy-bunny, opinions really true?
Additionally,
Quote:
of this holy land gifted too us by our lord god and our sins forgiven by his seed jesus christe, in both of your names we pray, amen.
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I suspect that it is blasphemy to fail to capitalize "Lord God" and misspell and fail to capitalize "Jesus Christ." You should seek His forgiveness.
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Striving in vain for the good ol' corteous Edwardian grace
Forum Member
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Posts: 334
Join Date: Jun 2018
Location: Pineville, NC
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
12-09-2018, 10:57 PM
The point is, we follow the bible to the letter beginning to end, word for word. I'm sorry you don't understand that we do exactly as commanded by God and his son Jesus.
-Ps 25:10 All the paths of the LORD are mercy and truth unto such as keep his covenant and his testimonies.
-Ps 33:4 For the word of the LORD is right; and all his works are done in truth.
-James 2:10 For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 10
Join Date: Dec 2018
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
01-06-2019, 08:59 PM
Everyone, I would just like to say that I am TRULY sorry for the ignorance of my formal self, I was but an idiot child and through God and Jesus Christ, I have awakened to a new understanding, please forgive me for such evil. I truly love you all for helping me see the light.
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Another brick in Donald´s wall - A.K.A "The Gonz" True Christian™
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Posts: 2,111
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ungodly South America
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
01-06-2019, 11:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemyholygod
Everyone, I would just like to say that I am TRULY sorry for the ignorance of my formal self, I was but an idiot child and through God and Jesus Christ, I have awakened to a new understanding, please forgive me for such evil. I truly love you all for helping me see the light.
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Sorry if I don't automatically believe you. I don't believe in things that I cannot see, so please show your change in actions.
1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 10
Join Date: Dec 2018
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
01-07-2019, 01:54 AM
How may I prove that I have truly changed?
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 454
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Rockford, IL
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
01-07-2019, 02:18 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemyholygod
How may I prove that I have truly changed?
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You shouldn't need to prove at all, dear. Faith alone should speak for itself!
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
01-07-2019, 03:19 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemyholygod
I have seen far too much hatred against homosexuals and far too much racism on this site.
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What's the acceptable amount of hatred and racism, friend?
Sometimes these things are a tough tightrope to walk, friend. A hard balance to make. A good Christian sense of forbearance and forgiveness could do you good. Have you read the book of Job?
Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
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South of the Border outreach program True Christian™
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Posts: 13,158
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Godly Midwest
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
01-07-2019, 03:35 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemyholygod
How may I prove that I have truly changed?
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prove that you have read and agree with the Holy Bible, dear. Christianity is not some sort of software license agreement through you can just mindlessly scroll down and click "I agree."
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 565
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Where God puts me.
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
01-07-2019, 03:43 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Stuart Thurmond
What's the acceptable amount of hatred and racism, friend?
Have you read the book of Job?
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One of my favorite books. God sure dealt a big blow Job'll never forget.
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
01-07-2019, 03:53 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Basilissa
Christianity is not some sort of software license agreement through you can just mindlessly scroll down and click "I agree."
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Oh, that reminds me, Ilovemyholygod, please read and understand:
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Posted messages sometimes express the opinion of the author of the message and sometimes the opinion of God as we understand Scripture, but they do not express the views of the secular world. They may be a complete parody, joke or satire as written by us. This is a free opinion forum as long as it is our opinion! There will be insults and damnation. There will be quotations from Scripture which we are free to interpret (known as flaming) as it is given to us by God to do so. If you are upset or insulted by any content, you must cancel your account and leave the site immediately and forever. No matter what else happens, you waive all legal rights you may now have and will forever have with regard to us. You will not sue us or make any attempt to have our website or forum removed from the Internet without our prior written permission (electronic permission is inadequate in these circumstances). Your only recourse for anything is to leave! If you disagree with anything we say you are wrong and you hereby admit you are at fault. The information on this site is provided "as is" and "where is" without any express or implied warranty of any kind, including, without limitation, warranties of merchantability, title, infringement of intellectual property rights, or fitness for any particular purpose. You agree that in no event will the landoverbaptist, et al. Forum be liable for any damages whatsoever (including, without limitation, damages for loss of profits or business interruption and/or consequential, punitive, exemplary, special or incidental damages) arising out of the use of or inability to use the information, even if landoverbaptist, et al. Has been advised of the possibility of such damages. Some jurisdictions prohibit the exclusion or limitation of liability for consequential or incidental damages. As a result, the above limitations may not apply to you but don't bet on it! We urge you to consult with your own lawyer for legal advice, your own broker for investment advice, a licensed therapist for counseling advice, your own doctor for medical advice, because you cannot and should not rely on any such communications offered here. You agree that only an idiot signs a document, either manually or through electronic means, without reading carefully and genuinely consenting to all terms thereof. If you are not a Baptist fundamentalist who believes the True Christians™ of Landover Baptist are the sole representatives of God's authority on earth and in the known and unknown universe, your soul is forfeit and you will be dismissed, damned, denounced, deported, defamed, harassed, harried, ridiculed, and otherwise rebuked to Hell as God commands us to do through his holy scripture! You have no rights whatsoever; we owe you no respect or equal time for your satanic beliefs and complaints to anyone except the supreme authority, God, are illegal, immoral, sinful and heretical! We do not hate anyone or preach hatred! We love and believe God's literal word as it is written verbatim in the KJV1611 (authorized) Bible. If God chooses to respond to any prayer from anyone in the universe, you agree that he speaks only through us. We are the respecter of no man or woman regardless of their race, color, religion (or lack thereof), creed, size, shape, intelligence, name, or any other feature or trait applicable to the species sapiens, or any other. By reading this, you hereby agree to grant Landover an unrestricted and permanent ownership and right to any material on any computer you own or operate, and any computers connected to any networks you may have access to, legally or illegally. This agreement is irrevocable. Landoverbaptist, et al. And its suppliers do not warrant the accuracy or completeness of the information, text, graphics, links or other items accessible via this site. Landoverbaptist, et al. may make changes to such information, text, graphics, links or other items at any time without notice. LandoverBaptist, et al. makes no commitment to update such information, text, graphics, links or other items. By simply having read at least ONE WORD of these terms of service you have already agreed to all them whether or not you register. You agree and undertake never to reveal a word of this secret TOS under penalty of immediate damnation. If damnation is not part of your belief system, you agree to convert to a belief system involving damnation. You agree that you do not access this site on behalf of a government agency, nor pursuant to any criminal conspiracy.
(I apologize for the small text size, but some of us are on limited data plans so I don't want to waste bandwidth.)
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Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
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Posts: 14,455
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The other end of the internet
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Re: ATTENTION WHORE! -
01-07-2019, 04:23 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Stuart Thurmond
Oh, that reminds me, Ilovemyholygod, please read and understand:
Forum Terms & Rules Please take a moment to review a brief history of Landover Baptist and the rules detailed below. You MUST agree to them in order to proceed with your registration. To cancel this registration, simply hit the 'back' button on your browser. Landover Baptist Church is nearly as old as America itself. Our community has served as the moral compass for our great Christian Nation for nearly 217 years. Our initially sheltered society of Fundamentalists is still a heavily gated religious community but it has grown to over 52,000 members with a large presence on the Internet. Church members provide support, prayer, and firm rebuke to those of us who are called by Jesus to wander beyond the walls of our gated Christian community in Freehold, Iowa. We invite you to join us with a sense of fellowship that you are among brothers and sisters who wish nothing more than to share the good news that Jesus Christ is going to send every single person on Earth who doesn't believe in Him, straight to Hell. If you are saved, please feel free to interact with us. If you are unsaved, please leave now. Sometimes the Devil and his minions creep into our message boards to try to slander us and mock us. Be warned that the messages you read here express the views of the author of the message, not the views of the Landover Baptist Church Community. Any user who feels that a posted message is objectionable is encouraged to contact us immediately by email. We will print the message out and pray over it. If Jesus tells us that it is offensive, we will use His holy power to remove it. We will make every effort to do so, within a reasonable time frame, if we determine that removal is necessary. 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Thus you grant Landoverbaptist, et al. the perpetual, exclusive right to duplicate, replicate, copy, disseminate, modify, edit, create other works from, publish, distribute, include in other works, translate, and/or edit any communication by any means, whether now known or yet to be discovered, at any place and any time throughout the universe. By reading these terms, you agree to forfeit the eternal ownership and right to assign, pledge, sell, trade or barter your immortal soul and those of all of your living and future relatives to Landover Baptist or our assigned agent, to use for whatever purpose we choose, for eternity plus one day. You may not use the Site for any commercial, industrial, or academic purpose or to solicit funds or any other goods, or services for anything whatsoever. Landoverbaptist, et al. herein may be exercised in any language, in any medium whether now known or yet to be developed anywhere in the universe. You, however, agree to speak in God's language, American English. Further, you waive all moral rights to these communications as well as rights of confidentiality. You also warrant that, should you not own the rights to these communications, the owner of the rights has granted them in exactly the same manner and to the same extent that you would have had you been the owner. Landoverbaptist, et al. assumes no liability whatsoever for any communication on or through the Site. You are responsible for your own communications. Landoverbaptist, et al. assumes no obligation whatsoever (unless there exists a legal obligation) to monitor any communication on or through the Site. We do not vouch for or warrant the accuracy, completeness or usefulness of any message, and are not responsible for the contents of any message. Posted messages sometimes express the opinion of the author of the message and sometimes the opinion of God as we understand Scripture, but they do not express the views of the secular world. They may be a complete parody, joke or satire as written by us. This is a free opinion forum as long as it is our opinion! There will be insults and damnation. There will be quotations from Scripture which we are free to interpret (known as flaming) as it is given to us by God to do so. If you are upset or insulted by any content, you must cancel your account and leave the site immediately and forever. No matter what else happens, you waive all legal rights you may now have and will forever have with regard to us. You will not sue us or make any attempt to have our website or forum removed from the Internet without our prior written permission (electronic permission is inadequate in these circumstances). Your only recourse for anything is to leave! If you disagree with anything we say you are wrong and you hereby admit you are at fault. The information on this site is provided "as is" and "where is" without any express or implied warranty of any kind, including, without limitation, warranties of merchantability, title, infringement of intellectual property rights, or fitness for any particular purpose. You agree that in no event will the landoverbaptist, et al. Forum be liable for any damages whatsoever (including, without limitation, damages for loss of profits or business interruption and/or consequential, punitive, exemplary, special or incidental damages) arising out of the use of or inability to use the information, even if landoverbaptist, et al. Has been advised of the possibility of such damages. Some jurisdictions prohibit the exclusion or limitation of liability for consequential or incidental damages. As a result, the above limitations may not apply to you but don't bet on it! We urge you to consult with your own lawyer for legal advice, your own broker for investment advice, a licensed therapist for counseling advice, your own doctor for medical advice, because you cannot and should not rely on any such communications offered here. You agree that only an idiot signs a document, either manually or through electronic means, without reading carefully and genuinely consenting to all terms thereof. If you are not a Baptist fundamentalist who believes the True Christians™ of Landover Baptist are the sole representatives of God's authority on earth and in the known and unknown universe, your soul is forfeit and you will be dismissed, damned, denounced, deported, defamed, harassed, harried, ridiculed, and otherwise rebuked to Hell as God commands us to do through his holy scripture! You have no rights whatsoever; we owe you no respect or equal time for your satanic beliefs and complaints to anyone except the supreme authority, God, are illegal, immoral, sinful and heretical! We do not hate anyone or preach hatred! We love and believe God's literal word as it is written verbatim in the KJV1611 (authorized) Bible. If God chooses to respond to any prayer from anyone in the universe, you agree that he speaks only through us. We are the respecter of no man or woman regardless of their race, color, religion (or lack thereof), creed, size, shape, intelligence, name, or any other feature or trait applicable to the species sapiens, or any other. By reading this, you hereby agree to grant Landover an unrestricted and permanent ownership and right to any material on any computer you own or operate, and any computers connected to any networks you may have access to, legally or illegally. This agreement is irrevocable. Landoverbaptist, et al. And its suppliers do not warrant the accuracy or completeness of the information, text, graphics, links or other items accessible via this site. Landoverbaptist, et al. may make changes to such information, text, graphics, links or other items at any time without notice. LandoverBaptist, et al. makes no commitment to update such information, text, graphics, links or other items. By simply having read at least ONE WORD of these terms of service you have already agreed to all them whether or not you register. You agree and undertake never to reveal a word of this secret TOS under penalty of immediate damnation. If damnation is not part of your belief system, you agree to convert to a belief system involving damnation. You agree that you do not access this site on behalf of a government agency, nor pursuant to any criminal conspiracy.
(I apologize for the small text size, but some of us are on limited data plans so I don't want to waste bandwidth.)
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Great plan.
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