Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > General Church Fellowship
Reload this Page Colonic Demons?
General Church Fellowship A place for True Christians to join in praise, faith and fellowship.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#41)
Old
defart's Avatar
defart defart is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
 
Posts: 19
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: RO/Bucharest
defart is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-09-2011, 07:32 PM

Portway. My initial username was deVart untill some frustrated moderator changed it(guess what, out of frustration...).



All the demons are in your people's heads.
Nobody's going to hell because god or the devil do not exist. They're a mere invention of the human mind(mind that seeks answers beiond his coping capabilities).
And if God would exist, why is he superficial/pure evil?
Shouldn't he be good? Shouldn't he help his creations? He never helped me even if I asked for his help.

God is fiction you insane creeps.
Reply With Quote
(#42)
Old
RevDrJack's Avatar
RevDrJack RevDrJack is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured

Hellbound Heathen Cathlick Caution - Poster is Crazy

 
Posts: 249
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Godless Cannukistan
RevDrJack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.RevDrJack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.RevDrJack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.RevDrJack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.RevDrJack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-09-2011, 07:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by defart View Post
Portway. My initial username was deVart untill some frustrated moderator changed it(guess what, out of frustration...).



All the demons are in your people's heads.
Nobody's going to hell because god or the devil do not exist. They're a mere invention of the human mind(mind that seeks answers beiond his coping capabilities).
And if God would exist, why is he superficial/pure evil?
Shouldn't he be good? Shouldn't he help his creations? He never helped me even if I asked for his help.

God is fiction you insane creeps.
You think this is an invention of the mind? If True Christian™ Proctologists were not doing their job, the secular industry would take over.
http://pinkboard.co.uk

Friends, never go to a proctologist outside of Landover.
Reply With Quote
(#43)
Old
Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Christian Love Real American™ Tithing Manager Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Senior Pastor Teabag Patriot TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Eats the Most Pork True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Nuts for JESUS! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Mower Donald Trump 2016! Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Bathfire Crown of Life Alternative Facts Probing for Jesus 20,000 posts Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 22,727
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-09-2011, 07:41 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by defart View Post
All the demons are in your people's heads.
Didn't you see the title of the thread - Your head may be up your colon, our heads aren't.
Quote:
Nobody's going to hell because god or the devil do not exist.
And that, my friend, is why Hell is full to overflowing
Quote:
And if God would exist, why is he superficial/pure evil?
God is love.
Quote:
Shouldn't he be good? Shouldn't he help his creations?
He does! He offers Salvation™
Quote:
He never helped me even if I asked for his help.
To be frank, I would have difficulty helping you, as you are an atheist.





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
Reply With Quote
(#44)
Old
Nighthawk's Avatar
Nighthawk Nighthawk is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 78
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Denver, Colorado
Nighthawk is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Nighthawk is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-09-2011, 10:10 PM

I own a cat... Does that put demons in my rectum?
Reply With Quote
(#45)
Old
CherryPie's Avatar
CherryPie CherryPie is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 4
Join Date: Jun 2011
CherryPie is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-09-2011, 10:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nighthawk View Post
I own a cat... Does that put demons in my rectum?
it depends....is it a ginger cat
Reply With Quote
(#46)
Old
Nighthawk's Avatar
Nighthawk Nighthawk is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 78
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Denver, Colorado
Nighthawk is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Nighthawk is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-09-2011, 10:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by CherryPie View Post
it depends....is it a ginger cat
No, she's a calico named Lady Barbossa. She has a black eye patch, so she needed a pirate name.
Reply With Quote
(#47)
Old
defart's Avatar
defart defart is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
 
Posts: 19
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: RO/Bucharest
defart is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-09-2011, 10:59 PM

I'm a forced atheist. As I mentioned somewhere else in this forum, I was raised to be a good christian. muhaha
Reply With Quote
(#48)
Old
Capt. Aaron Portway's Avatar
Capt. Aaron Portway Capt. Aaron Portway is offline
One of the Lord's Airborne Rangers
Salvation from Above
God's Favorite Pilot™
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts True Christian™ Ribfest '08 Bronze Tither Saved 1 Year Real American™ Christian Love Heaven Bound TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Mission to Australia Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture Ex-liberal True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Mission to Japan Porn Resistant Mission to Las Vegas God's favorite pilot True Republican Special Mission (North Korea) True Christian Provider™ award Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Hatchet Child Rearing Award Divorcee Prayer Warrior Anti-sodomy Iceland Mission to Messico Gunfest '07 The Hatchet Child Rearing Award The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Long service medal, 3rd class F1 for God

 
Posts: 6,282
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Flying the Friendly Skies for Jesus!
Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-09-2011, 11:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by defart View Post
Portway. My initial username was deVart untill some frustrated moderator changed it(guess what, out of frustration...).



All the demons are in your people's heads.
Nobody's going to hell because god or the devil do not exist. They're a mere invention of the human mind(mind that seeks answers beiond his coping capabilities).
And if God would exist, why is he superficial/pure evil?
Shouldn't he be good? Shouldn't he help his creations? He never helped me even if I asked for his help.

God is fiction you insane creeps.
I don't care how you spell fart in your country you foreign pervert, a butt addict is a butt addict is a BUTT ADDICT no matter how you slice it!

And you're the crazy one if you think God, the Devil, and demons don't exist. I feel sorry for you actually, since you don't have to believe in Hell for Jesus to send you there for all eternity!




Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
Reply With Quote
(#49)
Old
Sugarfree Sugarfree is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
 
Posts: 2
Join Date: Jun 2011
Sugarfree is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-09-2011, 11:27 PM

And how are those rectal demons cleaned out if I may ask?
Reply With Quote
(#50)
Old
Professor Bessemer's Avatar
Professor Bessemer Professor Bessemer is offline
Professor of Creation Science at Landover University
Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science
Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ Ex-Gay True Heterosexual™ Public Awareness Medal Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year Born again virgin Ex-Slut True Republican Guns, Guts and GLORY! True Christian™ Eunuch. True Christian Hotrodder Pro-Life Flat Earth Saved 10 Years Mission Long service medal, 3rd class 2011 Witch Hunt Award Doctor Ex-Masturbator Real American™ Porn Resistant BFF of Jesus Christian Love TC Bravery Teabag Patriot The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Mary Worshipper Ribfest '09 Nuts for JESUS! True Christian Nerd Prayer Warrior Gunfest '14 Stamp of Approval Aardvark Cup of Jesus Kirk Cameron Fan Club

 
Posts: 2,991
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Returned from studying the negro in Africa.
Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-10-2011, 12:33 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sugarfree View Post
And how are those rectal demons cleaned out if I may ask?
I normally do not resort to such obvious tactics, but a post as lazy as this one deserves exactly this sort of response:

READ THE THREAD


Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University



Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
Reply With Quote
(#51)
Old
Free Market Fred's Avatar
Free Market Fred Free Market Fred is offline
The Prophet of Profit, Now Giving Financial Advice to Jesus in Heaven
True Christian™

True Christian™ Christian Love Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Real American™ Gold Tither True Christian Caucasian Mission to Australia Teabag Patriot Tell her once One Year/1000 posts Mission to Las Vegas True Republican Super Soaker Baptism Award Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Freedom Factory

 
Posts: 803
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: In Heaven with Jesus
Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Free Market Fred will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-10-2011, 04:17 AM

In one of our recent corporate takeovers, my company recently became the majority shareholder in a well-known plumbing repair business. Although our original intent was simply to monopolize yet another essential service (and thus raise prices), this thread has certainly given me some good ideas on how to expand into new markets.

I see no reason why we couldn't offer personalized home service. You can get your drains cleaned and rectal demons exorcised in just one session. We plan to start distributing 2-for-1 coupons next month.


Clean drains, relieve constipation, exorcise demons. We do it all!

Our specially trained experts now attend classes in plumbing, proctology and exorcism. When it comes to such sensitive matters, it's best to call in the experts. Don't be tempted to hire some illegal Mexican with a garden hose - we're talking about your health here, not to mention your soul. Why take chances?


Pastor Ted Haggard, a satisfied customer.

For an extra fee, devout Christians can have the procedure performed by none other than Joe-the-Plumber himself. He's had more experience with rectal servicing that practically anyone in the business.

Of course, if you're one of those do-it-yourself types, we offer both sales and rentals of the necessary equipment.


Individual responsibility healthcare:
Why not do it yourself?


I'd recommend an annual demon-cleaning at least twice a year. It's the Christian thing to do.


Praise Jesus!
Brother Fred
CEO, The Uranus Corporation
Put your faith in Uranus!


Reply With Quote
(#52)
Old
Nighthawk's Avatar
Nighthawk Nighthawk is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 78
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Denver, Colorado
Nighthawk is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Nighthawk is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-10-2011, 09:53 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Talitha View Post
We do not perform exorcism. That is a catholic occupation.
Get those mary worshipers in and it wouldn't just be Demons they wanted from your Rectum.

If you are a skirt wearing nancy boy from North England then there is your problem.
Demons just love men in skirts.
Yes they do. It takes a real man, a kilted Highland warrior, to kick them out on his own.
Reply With Quote
(#53)
Old
dingdangdong dingdangdong is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
 
Posts: 1
Join Date: Jun 2011
dingdangdong is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-12-2011, 12:33 PM

How dare you judge people in that way? Isn't it only God who is in charge of who goes to hell and who does not? Your narrow-minded way of thinking is so ridiculous - If this is not a joke, then have fun cleaning people's asses, it doesn't help anything.
Reply With Quote
(#54)
Old
Rapture Eddie's Avatar
Rapture Eddie Rapture Eddie is offline
The Sermonator
True Christian™

Christian Love Heaven Bound The Lord’s Witness Wound Punched the most queers Tagging for Jesus Real American™ True Christian Caucasian TC Bravery True Christian Hotrodder True Christian™ Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus Tell her once

 
Posts: 190
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: RIDING WITH THE SON
Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.Rapture Eddie has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-12-2011, 12:46 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Free Market Fred View Post
In one of our recent corporate takeovers, my company recently became the majority shareholder in a well-known plumbing repair business. Although our original intent was simply to monopolize yet another essential service (and thus raise prices), this thread has certainly given me some good ideas on how to expand into new markets.

I see no reason why we couldn't offer personalized home service. You can get your drains cleaned and rectal demons exorcised in just one session. We plan to start distributing 2-for-1 coupons next month.


Clean drains, relieve constipation, exorcise demons. We do it all!

Our specially trained experts now attend classes in plumbing, proctology and exorcism. When it comes to such sensitive matters, it's best to call in the experts. Don't be tempted to hire some illegal Mexican with a garden hose - we're talking about your health here, not to mention your soul. Why take chances?


Pastor Ted Haggard, a satisfied customer.

For an extra fee, devout Christians can have the procedure performed by none other than Joe-the-Plumber himself. He's had more experience with rectal servicing that practically anyone in the business.

Of course, if you're one of those do-it-yourself types, we offer both sales and rentals of the necessary equipment.


Individual responsibility healthcare:
Why not do it yourself?

I'd recommend an annual demon-cleaning at least twice a year. It's the Christian thing to do.
Brother! It's just beautiful. It brings tears to my eyes just looking at it.

It sure beats using a pair of gauntlets and a hook thing on the end of a stick.
Where do I sign?

I'm sure this Heaven-sent device is going to be perfect for the removal of Cooter demons too.

GLORY!!!!


JUDGEMENT DAY


"I'll Be Back!!"
Reply With Quote
(#55)
Old
SDSDSDS's Avatar
SDSDSDS SDSDSDS is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 1
Join Date: Jun 2011
SDSDSDS is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-16-2011, 10:47 AM

Can i kill them by shitting them out?
Posted via Mobile Device
Reply With Quote
(#56)
Old
RevDrJack's Avatar
RevDrJack RevDrJack is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured

Hellbound Heathen Cathlick Caution - Poster is Crazy

 
Posts: 249
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Godless Cannukistan
RevDrJack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.RevDrJack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.RevDrJack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.RevDrJack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.RevDrJack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-16-2011, 03:14 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by SDSDSDS View Post
Can i kill them by shitting them out?
Posted via Mobile Device
No.

They will be with you for life. Unless you and turn for Jesus to heal you.

YIC
Reply With Quote
(#57)
Old
jorgen jorgen is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
 
Posts: 4
Join Date: Jun 2011
jorgen is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-20-2011, 06:35 PM

do zionist jews go to hell?

...wouldn't that mean your god is in hell too?


your solution to the jewish problem
Reply With Quote
(#58)
Old
Billy Bob Jenkins's Avatar
Billy Bob Jenkins Billy Bob Jenkins is offline
Family Man of the Year 2010-2013
About as Straight and Manly as you can get
Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™

True Christian™ Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian Christian Love Ready for the Rapture Ex-Masturbator Parking Lot Tither True Christian Provider™ award Punched the most queers Real American™ The Lord’s Witness Wound Heaven Bound Home Schooled True Christian Hotrodder Teabag Patriot The Hatchet Child Rearing Award One Year/1000 posts Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life True Republican Ex-treehugger Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Mission to Korea Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Billy Bob Jenkins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-20-2011, 08:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by jorgen View Post
do zionist jews go to hell?

...wouldn't that mean your god is in hell too?
God is omnipresent. Pedophile false prophets like Muhammed are in Hell and nowhere else.


The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
Reply With Quote
(#59)
Old
Cranky Old Man's Avatar
Cranky Old Man Cranky Old Man is offline
Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
You kids get off his lawn!
 

True Christian™ Real American™ Christian Love Christian Love Platinum Tither Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Gunfest '09 Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian The Lord’s Witness Wound 1st Year Bible College Punched the most queers Public Awareness Medal Public Awareness Medal One Year/1000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award True Christian Nerd Flat Earth The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Touched by Jesus Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Trump of GOD True Christian Artist God's chosen ones Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 5 Years Paula Deen Negro Support Group True Christian Hotrodder 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Crown of Life Crown of Incorruptibility 20,000 posts BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts GLORY Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Clorox Cured Me Anti-Biden F1 for God

 
Posts: 22,424
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Cranky Old Man will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-20-2011, 09:31 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by jorgen View Post
do zionist jews go to hell?
Yes. Duh!

Quote:
...wouldn't that mean your god is in hell too?
No. Duh!

Mark 16:16 "He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned."


Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
Reply With Quote
(#60)
Old
RaeAtkinson RaeAtkinson is offline
Unsaved trash, cripple
Under Investigation
 
Posts: 1
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Carrboro, NC
RaeAtkinson is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Colonic Demons? - 06-21-2011, 02:02 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Amen Brother Eddie! I can't tell you how many hours I have spent cleaning demons out of nubile young men's rectums! From the boy brothels of Bombay to the sin salons of Singapore, I've called upon the Holy Ghost to keep my resolve ROCK HARD in the saddle. It's a tough, sweaty job but someone's got to do it.

Shout GLORY!
I LOVE YOU Landover Baptist! You saved me from the fiery pits of hell!!!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
demonic possession, dung, toilet

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved