[God made the rainbow]

Thank you for letting me join your community.
I have searched for such a place, where my views
Will no longer be called extremist, neo-nazi, cruel
Or misinformed.

My mother, a church of England apologist sorely tempts
my faith, turning the other cheeks and forgiving sinners

My father, now sadly deceased, but safe in the arms of Jesus,Praise him.
Was a pastor of the Church of Barrow, a Calvinist Sect which strictly adheres to the teachings of Revd Wringhim, and I strive to follow his path.

I would love to visit your land of freedom but due to a disagreement between myself and the government, I called it research but they claim that my pipe bombs and similar were, and I quote "preparations for acts of terrorism" I find my self on terrorist watch list and cannot obtain a visa.

I am not allowed a fire arm of any description but my favorite would be a desert eagle .57 magnum.
Failing that, any shotgun, though by preference pump action.
Oh to live in a country where my views, criminal convictions, previous incarceration in a mental hospital and virtual blindness ( the pipe bomb research was not good for my health, but more of thatin future, if it is of interest to you)

My favourite part of the bible is psalm 23, since i have walked daily in the shadow of death, since the pipe bomb malfunction, but i fear no evil.

Apologies for any typo's in this post.
Some call themselves two finger typists, in my case that is a literal truth.

Yours in fellowship with The Lord.
GMTRB

Ps.
I only found out AFTER i obtained my user name that there are unsavory connotations associated with"rainbows".

[Basilissa]

Hello, dear, and to our Godly forum!

You seem like a decent fellow. I assume you've suffered for the and not for some false ideas (such as false Calvinist teachings)?

[Brother Gonzalez]

Originally Posted by God made the rainbow

Was a pastor of the Church of Barrow, a Calvinist Sect which strictly adheres to the teachings of Revd Wringhim, and I strive to follow his path.

Can you tell more about this Reverend? Google only shows a non-real character in some ungodly book.


I'm sure it's because Google is a tool of Satan, stopping us of finding about True Christians.

So, this Revd, is he Baptist?


Regards,


Unbridgeable

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Welcome to God's favorite forum. Tell me, when you prepare your Sunday roast in ol' England, do you add the mint sauce after cooking it in tepid water after 4 or 5 hours?

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

[I Man Rastafari]

Greetings my friend. I am not allowed membership in this forum but these Baptists graciously allow me to participate and I bid you welcome. This is a forum for Baptist people who are white or moving toward whiteness. I am an unrepentant Black man and Rastafari so I am not eligible but I am much loved here by these white people. Are you English? I have often seen the English in my home country which is Jamaica. They like to come to my country to frolic with African people and drink rum.

What were you trying to blow up with your pipe bombs? This sounds very dangerous to me.

Jah Guide!
Trevor

[Mary Etheldreda]

Greetings, and indeed ALL Praise to !!!

I'm sorry to hear what a disappointment to the LORD your own mother is. How blessed you must be to hate her for the sake of your Salvation so easy (Luke 14:26)! Welcome to the forums, dear. Any friend of Jesus is a friend of mine.

[Alvin Moss]

Welcome, friend. I perceive you are an Englishman. We have but few members who hail from your formerly Godly country, owing to the fact that most God fearing Englishmen have decamped for more Christian areas long since; their places taken by Hindus, Muslims and other unsavory individuals. As you live in a country populated by godless heathens and self loathing socialists, it is understandable that you were forced to turn to primitive explosive devices for protection. Here in Godly America, we are still well armed, though the Democrats are trying to disarm us. Civil war looms here, but has not yet broken out. We are praying for the destruction of the west coast of America, along with the godless Yankees, in order to lift the threat to the rest of America in time to avoid open hostilities.

I pray that you are, in fact, a saved Christian. Sadly, many who come to answer our world wide call for Christian fellowship turn out to be heathens and worse, here to vex Christians. If chaos is your goal, the truth will be revealed by our security and investigations ministry and you will be banned. If not, you will be made welcome and your spirit uplifted.

God Bless!

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Hello, Miss - or is it Mrs? - Rainbow and a warm welcome. I very much enjoyed the free verse form of your opening post.

I am one of the few True Christians™ living in England, as mentioned by Brother Alvin. You say your father preached in Barrow: do you mean the northern town of Barrow-in-Furness (or ''Barrow-in-Furnace", as my husband says it should be spelled ) ?

I am so sorry to hear about your fingers. Have you prayed on the matter and really, really believed that God can replace them if He wants to and that He will replace them ? Mark 11:24.

YiC
Joanna

[Brock Landers]

What is this .57 Magnum that you speak of? I have seen Dessert Eagles in .357 Magnum and .50 AE, but never .57 Magnum. I have never heard of a .57 Magnum Dessert Eagle, and I don't think that one exists. Are you perchance a fifth column infiltrator from the UN or some other one world organization that is out to take our guns and destroy our American way of life?

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

In Godless Britain, a Magnum is a type of chemical-based ice-cream made by a detergent manufacturer called Unilever. It is covered with chocolate from Belgium, a fictional country. I don't know if this is relevant? It might account for the cause of the blindness, I suppose, though not Our Dear Lord's apparent reluctance to provide a cure.

Miss/Mrs Rainbow, I will pray for you.

[BrotherLarry]

I greet you with warm Christian love, that gushes forth from the bowels of my being and emanates from the cockles of my heart. However, I welcome you cautionalistically, because we here are God fearing and Bible believing.

You must surely know that we are to obey the laws of the land:

Romans 13:1-5 - Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.

I have been seeking the scriptures that might allow pipe bombs and the like, but have come up wanting. If it isn't in the Bible, it can't be good.

This is not to say that True Christians™ are pacifistalists. No, indeed! We are solid, hairy, muscled men with huge resolve and many firearms. We are unafraid to defend our faith in the one true GOD and to defend GOD's favorite country, the USA.

I have entered your name, which I have abbreviated as simply "Rainbow," into my electronic prayer list device. This means you will be prayed for at various intervals, and I will lift your situation to the throne of grace for GOD's consideration.

COME, LORD JESUS!
BrotherLarry

[God made the rainbow]

So much fellowship, and so many questions,
I will try to answer in turn.

The revd Wringhim was
Sadly cursed by the real activities of his unspeakable namesake,
and no record of his works or teachings is to be found on google, to spare association with the t horrible pamphlet " confessions...etc".
I hesitate to type the full title as it is so profane.

My Revd Wringhim was a Baptist, in that he believed in full body immersion, until unconsciousness, so that the rebirth would be both physical and metaphysical after resuscitation.

The Calvinist part of his ministry is that you are saved or damned at Gods Holy will.....and He is infallible.

The pipe bomb was as a form of self defence, should papists move in next door, as guns are illeagal.

More to follow. My two fingers are cramping.

In God We Trust
Gmtb

[God made the rainbow]

Additional answers

I man Rastafari, I am glad you have educated me!
I was unaware persons were actually black.
What a revelation, I had assumed that solar exposure caused this coloration, my neighbours are often darker after their Holliday.

Does this mean that natives of New Jersey are really ORANGE?
Does that explain coloured as a term of description?

And what , if any, connection is their between agent orange and orange county?

With reference to the Dessert Eagle and its strange calibre, they were alas typos, though some amusement was given.


The church of barrow is so named as many tumes the revd Wringhim was so overcome by the holy spirit he was required to be wheeled to the pulpit in a barrow.

As for my race and gender.
Male, unashamedly, fully bearded and a kilt wearing Celt, of the Scottish tribe.

Cuisine is not our forte, in fact only two meals exist north of hadrians wall, boiled neeps and tatties with haggis, is preferred, but otherwise all food should be deep fried and indistinguishable. That is the choice.


Yours in the Lord
Gmtrb

( Gordon MacTrumble )

[I Man Rastafari]

Here is a spelling rule that has served me well. I learned this at the Methodist School in Kingston Jamaica which is my home though Africa is my true home. --We like dessert so much we give it two s's.-- I am thinking that a dessert eagle would involve ice cream and chocolate and would go well with deep fried twinkies.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Originally Posted by God made the rainbow

As for my race and gender.
Male, unashamedly, fully bearded and a kilt wearing Celt, of the Scottish tribe.

This concerns me a bit. As a woman in America, I am, unfortunately, naturally intimately familiar with the "Outlander" books and tv series (available through Showtime, and Amazon Prime, but not the up to date ones, not that I'm holding my breath or anything). A woman can hardly cross the street without coming across some reference to the bawdy, outwardly savage, secretly cultured, forged with unholy strength of muscle and character, exceedingly masculine yet surprising gentle and caring, man trope. To put him in a kilt, as these stories do, is to turn the woman's rebellion instincts into overdrive, as the kilt is naught more than a man-skirt, which gives a subliminal hint to the woman that this manly-man is intimately in touch with his feminine side. This instinctively makes the woman feel like the man is "on her side," and will defend her feminist agenda of rebellion against all things male. This concerns me as a decent, God-fearing, feminine woman in America, where men who wear skirts still get a good pounding, thanks be to God. Please tell me you're not one of those feminist kind of men, one who isn't afraid to cry, one who cheers for the underdog, one who will talk about his feelings as if that excuses behavior.

Originally Posted by God made the rainbow

Cuisine is not our forte, in fact only two meals exist north of hadrians wall, boiled neeps and tatties with haggis, is preferred, but otherwise all food should be deep fried and indistinguishable. That is the choice.


Yours in the Lord
Gmtrb

( Gordon MacTrumble )

No doubt this is a fall-out of your conquer and colonization by the godless British. I would encourage you to come to God's favorite nation, the City on the Hill, the United States of America, where a man can feast himself on the turducken, burgers made from alligator or buffalo, and frito pie. You won't walk away from the table hungry, and one day you won't walk away from it at all.

[Leroy Llewelyn]

Greetings, God Bless and welcome you.

Aren't haggises those odd animals with their legs shorter on one side of their bodies, depending upon which side of the mountain placed them? More evidence of His Holy design!


Yours on the hilltop with Christ,
Leroy Llewelyn

[Brock Landers]

Much egg on my face for the spelling errors. Satan must have gotten into the autocorrect on my phone. I might have to pull a Hillary and smash it with a hammer.

[Troubled christian]

Originally Posted by God made the rainbow

Thank you for letting me join your community.
I have searched for such a place, where my views
Will no longer be called extremist, neo-nazi, cruel
Or misinformed.

My mother, a church of England apologist sorely tempts
my faith, turning the other cheeks and forgiving sinners

My father, now sadly deceased, but safe in the arms of Jesus,Praise him.
Was a pastor of the Church of Barrow, a Calvinist Sect which strictly adheres to the teachings of Revd Wringhim, and I strive to follow his path.

I would love to visit your land of freedom but due to a disagreement between myself and the government, I called it research but they claim that my pipe bombs and similar were, and I quote "preparations for acts of terrorism" I find my self on terrorist watch list and cannot obtain a visa.

I am not allowed a fire arm of any description but my favorite would be a desert eagle .57 magnum.
Failing that, any shotgun, though by preference pump action.
Oh to live in a country where my views, criminal convictions, previous incarceration in a mental hospital and virtual blindness ( the pipe bomb research was not good for my health, but more of thatin future, if it is of interest to you)

My favourite part of the bible is psalm 23, since i have walked daily in the shadow of death, since the pipe bomb malfunction, but i fear no evil.

Apologies for any typo's in this post.
Some call themselves two finger typists, in my case that is a literal truth.

Yours in fellowship with The Lord.
GMTRB

Ps.
I only found out AFTER i obtained my user name that there are unsavory connotations associated with"rainbows".

Well what are your hobbies? your favorite book of the bible? who are you voting for? etc?

[Alvin Moss]

Originally Posted by God made the rainbow

As for my race and gender.
Male, unashamedly, fully bearded and a kilt wearing Celt, of the Scottish tribe.

Cuisine is not our forte, in fact only two meals exist north of hadrians wall, boiled neeps and tatties with haggis, is preferred, but otherwise all food should be deep fried and indistinguishable. That is the choice.

Friend Gordon,

As in most of the British isles, the vast majority of Christian folk in Scotland decamped for America long ago, here to supply the backbone and Indian fodder for westward expansion. My own family was among them, though some treacherously supported the King during the late unpleasantness and had to go to Nova Scotia in godless Canada after hostilities ended. There they remain today, unspoken of in my family. Prior to our arrival in America, we stopped off in Ireland to smite the papish savages, especially the O'Neils, damn them. We still break out the bagpipes on family occasions. While few Christians remain in Scotland, we know there are some, so don't be ashamed of your background. God will not hold it against you.

The haggis is another matter. Most Americans don't even know what a haggis is and we don't allow them to be imported into America. It is a vile dish, unfit for Christians. I advise you to cease your haggis eating forthwith. Deep frying is another matter. We fry just about everything except soup in my part of America.

[Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson]

You sound like a decent, Christian fellow, but the kelt is concerning as stated in Deuteronomy 22:5.

Cautiously warm,
Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson