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LBC psychiatric outpatient. Progressing nicely.
True Christian™
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Posts: 989
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, IA
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true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
11-22-2007, 08:05 AM
i be in my basements for days an days nows, wiv my bibles an my oldin computer an some crummy sorta ok programmin softwares, cuz lord God spoked to me an he saids cuz my true Christain logicks were bible-baseds, i be anoinnteds to write liddle programs for his glory, it true! but he also saids the anoinntin gonna run out when next i have my unclean times i so ashameds , cuz he not want no crabby an bloated codes
here be a liddle somethang i wroted to see what the answer would be even tho i new what the answer would be anyways, cuz every true Christain is a '10', an every catlick = big fat 0
here be another, the codes not work for unsaveds folk cuz only a true Christain can get a computer to replys them nattural langooages even when it not askeds to, an i no that cuz my computer yappity-yap-yap-yap to me all the times even when it not switched on
an here be my most anoinnteds code, cuz there be alotta thangs in it which make no good sense to unsaveds folk like addin them text strings an intigers an stuff an gettin a true answers but it worked, it true cuz lord God pored his blessin into my brains an into my computer, it be his logicks an it like that evil ole Miss.Pat benetar once saids 'hell is for catlicks' an everyone else who not saveds
Last edited by Petal; 11-22-2007 at 08:10 AM.
Reason: lord God tolded me to
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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
11-22-2007, 10:02 AM
I think Jesus will be smiling on you for your hard work Petal.
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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Predestinated Servant of Jesus Christ by the Will of God True Christian™ Theologian
True Christian™
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Posts: 4,420
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
11-22-2007, 11:58 AM
Petal, Indeed you have been in your basement prayer closet for a long time. But it was worth it! Your applications will perform beautifully on the new JesOS™ Operating System. Praise God!
I loved Newt before Newt was invincible
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,555
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
11-22-2007, 06:17 PM
Amazing code Sister Petal. We were worried about you since we were hearing rumors that all you did all day was baptize kittens and then play with your' little toy steam locomotive. The reduction in numbers of stray cats in Freehold seem to confirm this. Now we see these stories were false and Jesus, who from all code flows, was using you as His instrument for this Divine Revelation of an application. PRAISE!
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
11-22-2007, 06:54 PM
My God JESUS, Miss Petal, Bless You for pointing out the obvious.
I only Hope the Mens don't get Angry™ because they didn't figure it out first
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LBC psychiatric outpatient. Progressing nicely.
True Christian™
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Posts: 989
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, IA
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
11-29-2007, 08:05 AM
i pleaseds that you bootiful folk belive in my anoinntin, but i have had a blow to my code confidinces , an i be wonderin if anyone can helps me fix this next programs?
i wroted a program to answer the eternal kwestion 'can lord God create a rock so heevy that even he not ables to lift it?'. but somethang went very very wrongs, an output very very scary
where did i go wrongs? why the outputs be halloween hair lady? maybee lord God be punishin me, cuz maybee he thawt i trieds to make him look stoopid, an i not do that!
but then i reads there be thangs called sin-tax errors, but i thinks that be like a tax for being nawty, like the sware jar that momma makes my borther put moneys into whenever he backsass her or say cuss words , but i not recieve no bill for no schmelly sin-tax, so maybee it just another name for tithe? i not no, i just want my humble liddle programs to works real goods
Last edited by Petal; 11-29-2007 at 08:07 AM.
Reason: i not rememember? :(
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Predestinated Servant of Jesus Christ by the Will of God True Christian™ Theologian
True Christian™
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Posts: 4,420
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
11-29-2007, 05:09 PM
I loved Newt before Newt was invincible
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LBC psychiatric outpatient. Progressing nicely.
True Christian™
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Posts: 989
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, IA
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
11-30-2007, 03:10 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Larry Lee
I'm thinking you should: (1) ditch the business about lifting rocks, and (2) replace it with another thorny problem of theological weight. Such as"Who's the fairest on TBN?" It's something Jan worries about, and PRESTO! your program supplies the answer. Just an idea.
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Mr.Lee, thank you for tell me abouts that lady. i prayed to lord God for forgiveniss for sayin mean thangs about her, an he tolded me your theologickal kwestion just need a liddle reword to be true. i not unnerstand what he tell me, but lord God say that Miss.Jan more worrieds abouts "who be the fairy princess on TBN" so i dids some prayful image googlin, an lord God showeds me this:
why Miss.Jan perched on that nice ole man's sholders like a bootiful pink parrot? i not no, it like she a purty accessery, like she be his handbag or manbag? , i all confuseds
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Night Hag
Forum Member
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Enzed
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
12-01-2007, 02:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Petal
i pleaseds that you bootiful folk belive in my anoinntin, but i have had a blow to my code confidinces , an i be wonderin if anyone can helps me fix this next programs?
i wroted a program to answer the eternal kwestion 'can lord God create a rock so heevy that even he not ables to lift it?'. but somethang went very very wrongs, an output very very scary
where did i go wrongs? why the outputs be halloween hair lady? maybee lord God be punishin me, cuz maybee he thawt i trieds to make him look stoopid, an i not do that!
but then i reads there be thangs called sin-tax errors, but i thinks that be like a tax for being nawty, like the sware jar that momma makes my borther put moneys into whenever he backsass her or say cuss words , but i not recieve no bill for no schmelly sin-tax, so maybee it just another name for tithe? i not no, i just want my humble liddle programs to works real goods
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Then again Petal....maybe the "Lord God" has a sense of humour.
There's good evidence for this - just look at your nearest TC.
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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Honorary True Christian™ Sweet Placid Sister
Forum Member
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Posts: 9,562
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Surrounded by hippie vermin
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
12-12-2007, 07:12 AM
Well, this Petal is certainly a special young lady. And apparently well, er, "lurved"? By anyone but stray cats, I suppose.
What sort of computer do you have, Petal? Is it as nice as this one?
And are you the right age to be meeting a 9-year-old wealthy white Christian boy whose parents are Godless, filthy hippies?
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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
12-12-2007, 10:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by JennyD
Well, this Petal is certainly a special young lady. And apparently well, er, "lurved"? By anyone but stray cats, I suppose.
What sort of computer do you have, Petal? Is it as nice as this one?
And are you the right age to be meeting a 9-year-old wealthy white Christian boy whose parents are Godless, filthy hippies?
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Oh Purleeeeze!!!!
Didn't you realize the whole of Freehold is linked together in one massive Network?
Housed in a Bunker under ................. well under a certain building in Freehold we have one of the most advanced Computers available.
Running the JesOS Operating system of course!!
Here's a brief glimpse of our advanced technology:
And here's a typical Lady of Landover at work surfing the Innernets for Links to Jesus
Of course, after she had finished Cooking and cleaning and only with permission from her husband.
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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Director of European Evangelical Outreach A Shining Example of Christ's Love Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,677
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: A frictional country
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
12-12-2007, 12:55 PM
Very impressive programming there Petal!
Which brings me to the following question: is there a list of approved development environments and/or programming guidelines for JesOS ? I mean, you don't want programmers using backdoors or causing Access Violations, do you ? Is there something as a True Christian™ User Interface Guideline? XTreme Christian Programming perhaps?
I wonder because, although I'm not a True Christian™ by far, I might offer my services. Money is Money, right ? Of course, I'd feel obliged to Tithe, if you were to accept my offer
Psalm 81:10:
I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: true Christain™ code, it be anoinnteds -
12-12-2007, 04:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by JennyD
And apparently well, er, "lurved"? By anyone but stray cats, I suppose.
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We lurve Miss Petal because of her propensity to Baptise stray cats! Why, every good Christian knows that cats are nothing more than a Tool of Satan! (Which is, I suppose, different from the actual Member ("Tool") of Satan. But I am just a woman - I mean, Lady - and not here to argue the finer points of Theology anyway)
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