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  • Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

    Even though Valentine's Day is a Pagan, not a Christian day, sometimes we need to make adjustments for the greater good.

    I've been concerned about President Trump. He will be facing heaps of unjustified criticism from liberal atheists. I think he would really appreciate receiving valentines from our lovely ladies here at Landover Baptist. I mean, what man would not enjoy this? It would even be better if ladies across our great country sent valentines. Truck loads of valentines arriving at the White House for the President would be the best therapy in the world.
    Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

  • #2
    Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

    Yes, Mr. Hold, this is Harsha Shah. I am thinking that this is a lovely idea and I am now urging all my friends to send a postcard, too. Yes. Here is my card. It is giving Mr. Trump the message of ahimsa, the nonviolence, yes, and chastity and vegetarianism.



    Yes, I am sure that Mr. Trump will be very happy. Yes, I am sending him my thoughts of harmony and compassion. Yes.
    "Ecclesiastes 3:7
    A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak."
    Yes. Women are saving lives. It is time we are speaking! Yes!

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    • #3
      Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump



      Trump Train Rollin' In






      The Trump Train is a Rollin' In
      It is Full of Epic Win!
      He's Going to Bring Our Nation to Her Former Glory.
      Get out Spics Or You'll Be Sorry!


      He's Got Something for us
      and it is YUGE. It's His Heart of Course, You Silly Goose!







      Attached Files
      sigpic

      Tweet me Here
      My GODLY Bio Here

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      • #4
        Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump








        Last edited by Pim Pendergast; 01-20-2017, 08:23 AM. Reason: Fixed images
        Titus 3 : 3
        For we also once were foolish ourselves, disobedient, deceived, enslaved to various lusts and pleasures, spending our life in malice and envy, hateful, hating one another.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

          Originally posted by Harsha Shah View Post
          Yes, Mr. Hold, this is Harsha Shah. I am thinking that this is a lovely idea and I am now urging all my friends to send a postcard, too. Yes. Here is my card. It is giving Mr. Trump the message of ahimsa, the nonviolence, yes, and chastity and vegetarianism.



          Yes, I am sure that Mr. Trump will be very happy. Yes, I am sending him my thoughts of harmony and compassion. Yes.

          Sister Harsha,
          That whole Vietnam thing on the card may not be a good idea. You see, President Trump (may he forever be exalted) didn't serve in Nam, or Renge or any of those other countries you listed. I guess they must be all over there by Vietnam or Austria, but anyway, I hope he isn't offended when he sees it. In his loving way I am sure he will forgive you via Twitter. It was a thoughtful gesture of you, quite unlike most people of messican descent.
          Praying for you,
          BrotherLarry
          Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
          “The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

          Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
          Amen and Amen

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

            Just a friendly reminder to the beautiful ladies of Landover Baptist, Valentine's Day is but three weeks away. President Trump takes office tomorrow. He will need your Valentines to keep his spirits up as atheist cranks began their unjust criticism of him.
            Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

              What a timely idea, Mr. Mayor! I saw PRESIDENT Trump is walking into the highest office in the land with a historically low approval rating, which might deflate the confidence of a lesser man, but we know Mr. Trump to be above such trivialities as facts, information, or what it means to apply them in any practical sense.










              Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump


                I.N.V.I.T.A.T.I.O.N










                a VALENTINE celebration barbeque & spit-roast is being arranged

                “come as you are”

                Iknowyouwillenjoymyspecialhomegrownsizzle


                &

                tender meat in season


                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

                  There are places where you ladies can purchase President Trump Valentines if you would like to do so:

                  Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

                    Originally posted by Harsha Shah View Post
                    Yes, Mr. Hold, this is Harsha Shah. I am thinking that this is a lovely idea and I am now urging all my friends to send a postcard, too. Yes. Here is my card. It is giving Mr. Trump the message of ahimsa, the nonviolence, yes, and chastity and vegetarianism.



                    Yes, I am sure that Mr. Trump will be very happy. Yes, I am sending him my thoughts of harmony and compassion. Yes.
                    Dear Foreign Name,

                    What kind of demon are you?

                    I could make assumptions based on your name and photograph but to do so would be crass and rude.
                    But they mocked the messengers of God, and despised his words, and misused his prophets, until the wrath of the LORD arose against his people, till there was no remedy. (2 Chronicles 36:16)

                    The Bible is perfect and contains ZERO contradictions: A True Christian™ guide to logic
                    Using a spirit level to identify homosexuals: A guide for those without the "gaydar"
                    "eSports": Become Usain Bolt without leaving your sofa

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

                      President Trump keeps soldiering on despite unrelenting carping by liberals and atheists. I've heard through my political sources it really lifts his spirits to receive Valentine cards from lovely ladies.

                      My hope is that by Valentine's Day truckloads of valentines will be arriving at the White House.
                      Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

                        He's still got it!!!


                        Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

                          It's the time of year, Landover Ladies, when you need to cheer up our President by sending him a nice valentine. There are so many choices and he would appreciate any and all.

                          Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Landover Ladies, Send a Valentine to President Trump

                            President Trump () has designed the best Valentine for himself, ever:


                            I dunno about you, but to me, President Trump () bears striking similarity to Jon Snow. The only problem is, HBO has to rewrite the show a little bit, to show Jon Snow leading a migrant caravan AWAY from the Wall rather than towards it, and then, the parallel would be absolutely perfect!
                            God created fossils to test our faith.

                            * * *

                            My favorite LBC sermons:
                            True Christians are Perfect!
                            True Christian™ Love.
                            Salvation™ made Easy!
                            You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe the Old Testament.
                            Jesus is impolite. Deal with it.
                            Jesus is xenophobic and so should we.
                            Sanctity of Life is NOT a Biblical Concept.
                            Biblical view on modern-day slavery.
                            The Immorality of the "Universal Declaration of Human Rights."
                            Geneva Conventions vs. The Holy Bible.
                            God HATES Rational Thinking!
                            True Christian™ Man as a spitting image of God.

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