[Marshal Kim Jong-un]

Hello everybody and Happy New Year, did you see the fireworks in Pyongyang? Nothing special, however we have to focus on defense and providing a good quality of life for Korean citizen, so superficial fireworks are not particularly high on our priorities right now. Nevertheless, despite right-wing liberal western media demonization, we are still able to enjoy the celebration.

Anyway, I am make this topic to put across my predictions for 2017. This is in the politics section because for the majority of it is politics, as it will a topic I am interest in. This is not based on statistics or the Bible or any things like this. It is just my opinion. If you like, you can post your own predictions.


Here begin the predictions:


In United States, Donald Trump will be assassinated, likely by an SJW or somebody who is mentally ill (yes, all SJWs are mentally ill, but not all mentally ill people are SJWs). This will spark numerous conspiracy theories about the Alt-Right, each more dubious than the last. However, President Pence will prove to be popular amongst them, and U.S.-Russian relations will greatly improve.


In South Korea, Park Geun-hye will resign over corruption scandals. South Korea's next president will be a socialist who wants to bring about a peaceful solution to the tensions between North and South Korea, and to improve relations with the North, building to reunification.


In the United Kingdom, Theresa May will trigger Article 50 and Brexit, there will be pressures for her to call a snap election, but she will not. UKIP will lose support, perhaps even dissolving as an party, and Jeremy Corbyn will face challenges to his leadership, perhaps even an split in the Labour Party.


In Germany, Angela Merkel will lose the next election to Alternative fur Deutschland.


In France, Marine Le Pen will win the next election.


In Religion, Pope Francis will resign, I am not like this Pope anyway, but the next one will be a lot worse. He will be more overtly right-wing and socially conservative and very popular amongst the Alt-Right. ISIS will become close to be defeat. IsraHELL will decrease minorly in size as Palestinians fight back against their aggression.


The Alt-Right and SJWs will decrease minorly in number whilst leftist and left-leaning causes such as Communism, Anarchism and Social Democracy will gain support and popularity, particularly amongst the internet.


Art, Music and Culture will be the best we have seen in the 21st century. Beautiful works of art we will see, and classical music will gain popularity. Science and Technology will also advance to a level we have never seen before.


And last but certainly not least, if you thought the memes in 2016 are the dankest you have seen, then you have not seen anything yet. We will retain the good memes of 2016 such as Pepe, "Here come dat boi" and "We are number one", whilst doing away with such frightening memes as dabbing. Not only that, but we shall create even better memes.


Anyway, happy new year, what does you think of my predictions? What does you think will happen in 2017? I would love to hear your thoughts. Thank.

[MitzaLizalor]

some of your predictions seem more detailed than others

[Elmer G. White]

Dear Heathen,

It is well-known that only the Bible can produce consistently True Prophecies™. While you are a repulsive sinner, this does not necessarily mean that your prophecies would be incorrect. As we are well aware, even a broken watch is correct two times a day.

Due to this, I checked some of your delusional ideas against the Bible. In some cases, I am reluctant to admit that there is a minute possibility of some of this actually taking place.

Originally Posted by Marshal Kim Jong-un

In United States, Donald Trump will be assassinated, likely by an SJW or somebody who is mentally ill (yes, all SJWs are mentally ill, but not all mentally ill people are SJWs). This will spark numerous conspiracy theories about the Alt-Right, each more dubious than the last. However, President Pence will prove to be popular amongst them, and U.S.-Russian relations will greatly improve.

God does hold The Donald in high esteem. It is possible that He is impatient to get The Donald into Heaven to be His companion for ever, so it's all up to Jesus. Well, obviously, everything is.

Psalms 116:15
Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints.

As for Pence, the omens are good.

Isaiah 66:6
A voice of noise from the city, a voice from the temple, a voice of the LORD that rendereth recompence to his enemies.

In South Korea, Park Geun-hye will resign over corruption scandals. South Korea's next president will be a socialist who wants to bring about a peaceful solution to the tensions between North and South Korea, and to improve relations with the North, building to reunification.

Does someone actually care? Is "Park" really a name? A place to distribute Chick Tracts?

In the United Kingdom, Theresa May will trigger Article 50 and Brexit, there will be pressures for her to call a snap election, but she will not. UKIP will lose support, perhaps even dissolving as an party, and Jeremy Corbyn will face challenges to his leadership, perhaps even an split in the Labour Party.

Does someone actually care? The UK abandoned Jesus eons ago with "gay" marriage.

1 Timothy 1:10
For whoremongers, for them that defile themselves with mankind, for menstealers, for liars, for perjured persons, and if there be any other thing that is contrary to sound doctrine;

In Germany, Angela Merkel will lose the next election to Alternative fur Deutschland.

"Alternative Fur Deutchland"? Artificial, fake fur for the fashion industry? Obviously, with most of Mankind succumbing to shiny objects instead of Jesus, this could actually happen!

1 Timothy 2:10
In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;

In France, Marine Le Pen will win the next election.

I don't think so. Mariners are Spiritual cowards.

Jonah 1:5
Then the mariners were afraid, and cried every man unto his god, and cast forth the wares that were in the ship into the sea, to lighten it of them. But Jonah was gone down into the sides of the ship; and he lay, and was fast asleep.

In Religion, Pope Francis will resign, I am not like this Pope anyway, but the next one will be a lot worse. He will be more overtly right-wing and socially conservative and very popular amongst the Alt-Right. ISIS will become close to be defeat. IsraHELL will decrease minorly in size as Palestinians fight back against their aggression.

Again, everyone is praying for the demise for the Catholic cult, so eventually Jesus will hear our pleads and grant our wish! This one is too easy, although we cannot know if it's going to be 2017.

Revelation 20:3
And cast him into the bottomless pit, and shut him up, and set a seal upon him, that he should deceive the nations no more, till the thousand years should be fulfilled: and after that he must be loosed a little season.

The Alt-Right and SJWs will decrease minorly in number whilst leftist and left-leaning causes such as Communism, Anarchism and Social Democracy will gain support and popularity, particularly amongst the internet.

This is about as ambiguous as Nostradamus. I'm sure you'll cash on this one, as any event can be interpreted to be a reflection of this incomprehensible string of words. I do understand that this is still Babel's doing.

Genesis 11:7
Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another's speech.

Art, Music and Culture will be the best we have seen in the 21st century. Beautiful works of art we will see, and classical music will gain popularity. Science and Technology will also advance to a level we have never seen before.

This is True™ as the blockbuster The Case for Christ open in all cinemas in April 2017!

John 14:6
Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

And last but certainly not least, if you thought the memes in 2016 are the dankest you have seen, then you have not seen anything yet. We will retain the good memes of 2016 such as Pepe, "Here come dat boi" and "We are number one", whilst doing away with such frightening memes as dabbing. Not only that, but we shall create even better memes.

All things considered, I have to classify you among those mentioned in Mark 13:22.


Yours in Christ,
Elmer

[Johny Joe Hold]

You left out the predictions for the only place we are interested in, Freehold, Iowa.

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

I predict we are going to learn to love the soothing rasp of Donald's voice calling for thoughts and prayers as he explains why restricting access to guns is what the terrorists want. Trust me.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold

You left out the predictions for the only place we are interested in, Freehold, Iowa.

Well quite, Brother Mr Mayor, Sir. Tell us, Marshal, will there be any progress on the long-delayed proposal to make Freehold and Tumangang Sister Cities?

[BrotherLarry]

No man knows the future, you despot, and I am praying the power of the precious BLOOD OF JESUS over this forum right now, Father God. I just pray that this witchcraft and divination ceases in Christ's Holy Name, that Name above all other names, JESUS. I am surprised that my fellow Christians have fallen into this trap.


(Deuteronomy 18:9-12) (Leviticus 19:31) (Micah 5:12)


Jesus and His prophets are the ONLY ones who can soothsay.


The power of Christ compels you to GO, devil!


COME, LORD JESUS!
BrotherLarry

[Johny Joe Hold]

Originally Posted by Marshal Kim Jong-un

Hello everybody and Happy New Year, did you see the fireworks in Pyongyang?

Anyway, happy new year, what does you think of my predictions? What does you think will happen in 2017? I would love to hear your thoughts. Thank.

I am working with other True Christians™ to make the largest air lift of Bibles ever to North Korea. There is nothing that would help your people more than learning about sin and an eternity in hell.

I confess to having some trouble finding a place the publishes Bibles in your language of Chinese. Any help would be appreciated.

[Marshal Kim Jong-un]

Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold

I am working with other True Christians™ to make the largest air lift of Bibles ever to North Korea. There is nothing that would help your people more than learning about sin and an eternity in hell.

I confess to having some trouble finding a place the publishes Bibles in your language of Chinese. Any help would be appreciated.

Friend, if you were to drop Bibles in glorious DPRK, it would have to be in Korean language. Besides, we has plenty of Bible, they are totally not banned because for we are totally not an evil dictatorship that censor everything that is disagree. We are FREE and DEMOCRACY. Any claim that we are not is an Anti-Juche Right-Wing Liberal Capitalist Fascist slur. Nevertheless, if you drop Bibles on us, we will retaliate with copies of The Selected Works of Kim Il-sung dropped on Iowa.