Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians)
Reload this Page Dutch rider: is it gay?
Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians) At LBC, we will cure your perversion of choice (even if we have to stone you).

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Dr. Anthony J. Toole's Avatar
Dr. Anthony J. Toole Dr. Anthony J. Toole is offline
An old soul
True Christian™

Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture Real American™ Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Pro-Life Donald Trump 2016! Mission to Messico Touched by Jesus Christian Love Protected by JESUS Teabag Patriot Alternative Facts TC Bravery True Christian Caucasian True Scientist™ Doctor Get Behind Me Doctor - NO TEAM FORTRESS! True Christian™ Real American™ True Republican BFF of Jesus Ex-eurotrash True Christian™ Protected by JESUS Friend of Jesus Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD The Lord’s Witness Wound Persecuted Prayer Warrior Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Ex-liberal QAnon Storm Chaser Tool of God Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor Sweet Toole Verified by Jesus Gold Tither Eats the Most Pork Saved 10 Years Platinum Tither Kirk Cameron Fan Club Stamp of Approval Crown of Glory

 
Posts: 5,204
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: USA-UK-France (traveling)
Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Dr. Anthony J. Toole will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Dutch rider: is it gay? - 07-20-2018, 07:19 AM

Brothers, I have an urgent question from an American friend. Apparently, a few nights ago, he reached an emotional low after having to abandon his property in Thailand (for unproven charges) and to travel to France on a different passport in the trunk of a taxi. All very standard stuff. Anyway, my point is, the other night he was persuaded to engage in something all members living in the EU are used to performing on a daily basis but that may be unbecoming of a True American Christian. Due to his weakened condition he succumbed to the Dutch Rider maneuver.
Quote:
Dutch Rider
The action of grabbing your dick then having a partener/friend grabbing your arm and jerking you off.
My friend was assured that there are sufficient degrees of separation involved that it does not make him gay but in the light of day I'm not so sure. I'd appreciate your reassurances for my friend that he is still welcome at Christian events and also, for my friend, the location any private Christian meet-and-greets in Europe (yacht or chateau preferred). Can travel.
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
Nobar King's Avatar
Nobar King Nobar King is offline
Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
Christ's Guardian
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ True Christian Provider™ award Ribfest '07 Christian Love Tin Tither Real American™ Cleanest Kitchen Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Hotrodder Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian True Christian Nerd TC Bravery Ex-liberal Ex-Christ-Killer Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Saved 5 Years Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life 20,000 posts Eats the Most Pork True Republican Divorcee Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Early riser Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Grammar Nazi Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Cup of Jesus Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016! Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Prayer Re: Dutch rider: is it gay? - 07-20-2018, 11:20 AM

This sounds similar to when your lady friend is pleasuring herself and she asks you to help. Not that I have ever done this.


The only reason I could see you needing a man to help me do this would be if I was physically incapable of doing it myself. Not that I do that kind of thing anyway.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
James Hutchins's Avatar
James Hutchins James Hutchins is offline
True Christian™
Just a Regular Nice Guy
 

True Christian™ Silver Tither Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Provider™ award Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator TC Bravery Gunfest '09 Ready for the Rapture Punched the most queers Jailed for JESUS True Christian Caucasian The Lord’s Witness Wound Teabag Patriot Mission to Australia One Year/1000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life ex-sheep-shagger Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Hotrodder Saved 1 Year Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award 20,000 posts Long service medal, 3rd class Home Schooled Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Early riser Kirk Cameron Fan Club Trump of GOD Mission to Korea Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Crown of Incorruptibility Alternative Facts Mower Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Crown of Righteousness Crown of Life Crown of Rejoicing BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus In Love With Zeke True Christian™ Cowboy GLORY Saved 5 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 29,835
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Prayer Re: Dutch rider: is it gay? - 07-20-2018, 12:05 PM

I find having a Dutch Rider to be unpleasant. While it is nice to have a hand on a long haul, I am not some whinny joo :joo' that needs help. If I am going to have a 'buddy', I much prefer a young man, wide eyed, an apprentice if you will, to whom I can show my rope. To fill a young man with new experiences is one of the tasks God has seen fit to give me.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
Brother Gonzalez's Avatar
Brother Gonzalez Brother Gonzalez is offline
Another brick in Donald´s wall - A.K.A "The Gonz"
True Christian™
 

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Christian Love Friend of Jesus Ready for the Rapture Trump of GOD Hands Off Landover Mission to The Mexican Realms Mission to Messico Flat Earth True Christian™ Guns, Guts and GLORY! Donald Trump 2016! Babysitter Outreach preacher Touched by Jesus Ex-Mary Worshipper 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Hatchet Child Rearing Award Alternative Facts Kirk Cameron Fan Club Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Righteousness Mower Crown of Life Probing for Jesus The Gonz GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Polling for Christ Midget porn survivor

 
Posts: 2,111
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ungodly South America
Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Dutch rider: is it gay? - 07-20-2018, 05:30 PM

As usual, we have to turn to the Bible to see the answer.

Leviticus 18:22 - Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it [is] abomination.





So first question: Is it necesary for a Dutch Rider to be lying? Do your friend does it as well with women?


I think standing up or seating are secure positions to not be breaking any commandement.


Leviticus 20:13 - If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood [shall be] upon them.



Same as before. Lying is the key.


1 Corinthians Chapter 6

9 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,

10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

11 And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God.


So, if you do the Dutch in a non effeminate way, you are ok. The key here is not to be a pansie while performing the act. Let's say, if you add some talking about sports, I think you are ok.


1 Corinthians 7:2 - Nevertheless, [to avoid] fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.


So as long as you have a wife, you are not in fornication. If you have a wife and the scene you painted in the OP happens, still nothing to worry about.


Romans 1:27 - And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.



(Digressio, I LOVE how there is a "natural use" of the woman. SEE FEMINAZIS, USE OF THE WOMAN = OBJECT. GOD SAID IT NOT ME)


Here we can add something else: the problem is the lust. As long as the act is performed with no lust, so more like a mechanical act, then is ok.


So far, so good. I can be Biblically sure that the Dutch Rider is not again all the multiple anti-gay warnings on the Bible.


But, and there is always a but, what happens with the seed? IT DOES NOT HAVE TO TOUCH THE GROUND.


Genesis 38:9 And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother.



Please be very careful with this last part. It is very important. Maybe some plastic on the floor can avoid being commiting an involuntary sin and ending up in Hell.


1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Christian Love Real American™ Tithing Manager Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Senior Pastor Teabag Patriot TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Eats the Most Pork True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Nuts for JESUS! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Mower Donald Trump 2016! Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Bathfire Crown of Life Alternative Facts Probing for Jesus 20,000 posts Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 22,727
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Dutch rider: is it gay? - 07-21-2018, 08:13 PM

See that title? "Dutch rider: is it gay?"


Can you think of anything that is (a) Dutch and (b) not gay?





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
Reply With Quote
(#6)
Old
James Hutchins's Avatar
James Hutchins James Hutchins is offline
True Christian™
Just a Regular Nice Guy
 

True Christian™ Silver Tither Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Provider™ award Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator TC Bravery Gunfest '09 Ready for the Rapture Punched the most queers Jailed for JESUS True Christian Caucasian The Lord’s Witness Wound Teabag Patriot Mission to Australia One Year/1000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life ex-sheep-shagger Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Hotrodder Saved 1 Year Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award 20,000 posts Long service medal, 3rd class Home Schooled Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Early riser Kirk Cameron Fan Club Trump of GOD Mission to Korea Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Crown of Incorruptibility Alternative Facts Mower Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Crown of Righteousness Crown of Life Crown of Rejoicing BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus In Love With Zeke True Christian™ Cowboy GLORY Saved 5 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 29,835
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Cross Re: Dutch rider: is it gay? - 07-25-2018, 04:51 PM

I was taught as a young boy by my Bible teacher (Pastor Barnabas Flint,. our beloveds Ezekiel's cousin) that going Dutch was the same as masturbation and it was self serving. In the Bible, we are taught to give our fellow man a hand and relieve him of his burden.
Revelation 3:20
20 Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.


I'd like to make a prayer to God now, and lay prostate before Him and beg for Him to come unto me.
Luke 6:38
38 Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
Reply With Quote
(#7)
Old
BrotherLarry's Avatar
BrotherLarry BrotherLarry is offline
Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
True Christian™

Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian™ Ready for the Rapture Porn Resistant Persecuted One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Gnathologist Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Stamp of Approval Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork TC Bravery True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Touched by Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Ex-Mary Worshipper Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Super Soaker Baptism Award Pastor Ezekiel Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud Team Fortress Denier

 
Posts: 2,395
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Prodigal Son of Godless NYC.
BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Jesus Re: Dutch rider: is it gay? - 07-29-2018, 10:30 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole View Post
Brothers, I have an urgent question from an American friend. Apparently, a few nights ago, he reached an emotional low after having to abandon his property in Thailand (for unproven charges) and to travel to France on a different passport in the trunk of a taxi. All very standard stuff. Anyway, my point is, the other night he was persuaded to engage in something all members living in the EU are used to performing on a daily basis but that may be unbecoming of a True American Christian. Due to his weakened condition he succumbed to the Dutch Rider maneuver.
My friend was assured that there are sufficient degrees of separation involved that it does not make him gay but in the light of day I'm not so sure. I'd appreciate your reassurances for my friend that he is still welcome at Christian events and also, for my friend, the location any private Christian meet-and-greets in Europe (yacht or chateau preferred). Can travel.

My Dear Brother in Jesus:


It is well known that I have been blessed with a special love for homers and I have often attended their get-togethers and celebrations. I have wandered into the seediest of bars and enjoyed the sunshine of Key West and San Francisco. I have wandered the streets of Lima, Caracas, and Rio Speedwagon. In each of these places, I have, for educational purposes, observed their traditions, getting up close and personal to the action.


I may assure you that this "Dutch Rider" is a rare thing, even amongst those of Europe. In most cases, one's "partner" is brought to completion by mutual Onanism (May God forgive each one) through direct contact of the hand or other parts of the body, rather than simply touching the arm of the fellow while enacting the Onanistic movement. I would be more than happy to have this demonstrated for you.


Therefore your friend is just fine. He retains the Blood of Jesus over sin, and will one day sup with Christ in Glory. I hope this brings comfort.


In love and concern,
BrotherLarry


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
Reply With Quote
(#8)
Old
Dana723's Avatar
Dana723 Dana723 is offline
Forum member
Forum Member

Protected by JESUS Cleanest Kitchen True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Pro-Life Kirk Cameron Fan Club Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus

 
Posts: 781
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: The greatest country in the world - United States!
Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Dana723 is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Dutch rider: is it gay? - 07-30-2018, 12:10 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherLarry View Post
My Dear Brother in Jesus:


It is well known that I have been blessed with a special love for homers and I have often attended their get-togethers and celebrations. I have wandered into the seediest of bars and enjoyed the sunshine of Key West and San Francisco. I have wandered the streets of Lima, Caracas, and Rio Speedwagon. In each of these places, I have, for educational purposes, observed their traditions, getting up close and personal to the action.


I may assure you that this "Dutch Rider" is a rare thing, even amongst those of Europe. In most cases, one's "partner" is brought to completion by mutual Onanism (May God forgive each one) through direct contact of the hand or other parts of the body, rather than simply touching the arm of the fellow while enacting the Onanistic movement. I would be more than happy to have this demonstrated for you.


Therefore your friend is just fine. He retains the Blood of Jesus over sin, and will one day sup with Christ in Glory. I hope this brings comfort.


In love and concern,
BrotherLarry
What a brave and wonderful man you are, Brother Larry! Your future wife will be the happiest woman on earth!


Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?
1 Corinthians 11:13
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved