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SalvationSeeker SalvationSeeker is offline
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Default 09-15-2006, 06:10 PM

Arrh, my True Christian™ eyes..

Begone Sofa, you harlot filth.
Im sure nobody wants harlots here, and especially not 15 year old harlots like you. Stop trying to lure Godly Men away from Jesus.


The other dresses are indeed Godly, women would do well to cover up as much as possible. Just remember this basic guideline:

"Ye shall keep my statutes. Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind: thou shalt not sow thy field with mingled seed:neither shall a garment mingled of linen and woollen come upon thee."
Leviticus 19:19


If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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(#22)
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~Sofa~'s Avatar
~Sofa~ (Recalcitrant) ~Sofa~ is offline
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Default 09-15-2006, 06:18 PM

Quote:
15 year old harlots like you
Get your facts right, I'm a 15,000 year old demon. The kinda demon that makes girls lesbians.
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(#23)
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SalvationSeeker SalvationSeeker is offline
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Default 09-15-2006, 06:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Sofa~ View Post
Get your facts right, I'm a 15,000 year old demon. The kinda demon that makes girls lesbians.
Your silly lies wont save you from hell, harlot.


If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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(#24)
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Daisy Mae Johnson's Avatar
Daisy Mae Johnson Daisy Mae Johnson is offline
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Default 09-15-2006, 06:44 PM

SOFA!

I'm assigning you 3 warning points Harlot! One for being underage on God'S Favorite Forum™. One for posting that pic of that wanton hussey. One for saying you are a demon!


Stern, Sister Thumper




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~Sofa~ (Recalcitrant) ~Sofa~ is offline
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Default 09-15-2006, 09:00 PM

Quote:
Your silly lies wont save you from hell, harlot.
I'm not lying! I Love JESUS and sincerely want to repent for claiming to be a demon.

Last edited by Daisy Mae Johnson; 09-15-2006 at 09:18 PM. Reason: Edit: minor spelling errors.
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(#26)
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Daisy Mae Johnson Daisy Mae Johnson is offline
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Default 09-15-2006, 09:27 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Sofa~ View Post
I'm not lying! I Love JESUS and sincerely want to repent for claiming to be a demon.
Praise JESUS Sofa!

Maybe there is some help for you afterall.

Question though..? Why is your name Sofa? Because you rassle everyone you know on your "Sofa of Love"?

If so you must stop now! Or you will be rasslin' Satan large, throbbing tallywacker.




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(#27)
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Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
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Default 09-16-2006, 10:51 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Sofa~ View Post
What about this one:



Even modeled by a godly blonde haired, blue eyed woman!
How revolting. This outfit looks alot like the ones those fallen women wear in downtown DesMoines when I lead some of the True Christian™ brothers in witnessing to strippers. Brother Mike, what do you think about this?


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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(#28)
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Brother Temperance Brother Temperance is offline
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Default 09-16-2006, 03:48 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
God will punish those who wear strange clothes.

"I will punish ... all such as are clothed with strange apparel. -- Zephaniah 1:8

Strange apparel includes whatever the harlot andro is wearing or ever suggests....
Yet another of the many reasons why Christ hates emo goths!


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Pastor Al E Pistle Pastor Al E Pistle is offline
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Default 09-16-2006, 04:35 PM

I must be hallucinating. I would wager there IS an image in your signature.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
FINE!!!
Better now?

Why am I unable to put an image in my signature?


Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


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(#30)
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SUV SUV is offline
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Have at it, anytime!

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Default 09-16-2006, 05:08 PM

Gorgeous Christian gowns, Gals!!!

And I only Hope that there is a Special Rung of HELL for the Abomination known as "pedal pushers" or "Capris" which are even worn by some "Men" now (I tried to post the Image but Jesus, that Good Old Boy, prevented the picture from Appearing. GLOWry!)

So I guess I might not go to HELL after all for that time I wore kulottes. Although they are rather comfortable if worn when curling up with a Good Book:



PS And speaking of "Fashion," who or what let that "Boneheaded Atheist" Rachael von Hellbound back in here with that Cheap Tiara on?!!

SUV

Last edited by SUV; 09-16-2006 at 05:09 PM. Reason: SUV in wrong spot
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Mrs. Rogers's Avatar
Mrs. Rogers Mrs. Rogers is offline
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Default 09-17-2006, 06:35 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
glad to pass on some wonderful former bridesmaid dresses, sir!
That is very generous of you, as we could probably squeeze 3 size eight dresses out of the pale lilac number.



True Christians are Perfect!

Signs that you belong to a FALSE Christian Church.

Persecution You Have Endured for CHRIST: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger in Christ.

For True Christians™ only: please send me Project Habakkuk updates at gertruderogers@landoverbaptist.net. Thank you.
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