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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-24-2007, 06:01 AM
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Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe
Meaning what Rachael? There were only men present when Pastor Zeke showed us prayer had cured his ED. It is not like there was anything perverted going on.
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Of course, what could possibly be odd about a whole room of people ogling Zeke's schlong?
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Oh here you go with your so called "logic" you pagan atheists delight in! St Paul warned us about logic.
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I.....see.
So logic is frowned upon? I take it common sense is blasphemy to you, then?
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Viagra.
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Yes. That.
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-24-2007, 10:28 AM
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Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
Very good idea, Lil!
As an added bonus, each graduate of our courses could each receive a rottweiler pup and a kitten fathered by your cat.
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Is there any kind of perverted, ungodly mating behaviour you won't condone? Seriously, encouraging cats to rape rottweilers is low even by your standards.
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BJ.....all you did here was rephrase the word 'chattel'.
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And? I've seen you use the word 'woman' in your posts, how is that any different?
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Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
Of course, what could possibly be odd about a whole room of people ogling Zeke's schlong?
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You see, this is what you're missing out on by not becoming a True Christian™! I may not have been in the room at the time, but I got the Church newsletter that was sent out about it. Zeke was so pleased about his demon being cast out that he made sure people on four different continents got to see the proof of his Glory©! PRAISE!
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Yes. That.
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Vile pervert! Even mentioning the word 'viagra' makes you open your mouth in anticipation! I'm just surprised that you didn't find a drooling smilie to use.
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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True Christian™ Theologian
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Posts: 3,979
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-25-2007, 12:16 AM
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Originally Posted by lilith
Viagra.
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Viagra is witchcraft!
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Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
So logic is frowned upon? I take it common sense is blasphemy to you, then?
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No.
True logic; that is the one gained from the Holy Spirit is fine.
I use it all the time in my arguments.
Worldy wisdom (ie secular "logic") however.. is not fine.
It's nothing but folly.
If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
Last edited by SalvationSeeker; 08-25-2007 at 12:20 AM.
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Night Hag
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Posts: 1,231
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Enzed
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-25-2007, 01:36 AM
" You see, this is what you're missing out on by not becoming a True Christian™!
Amazingly,I've learned to live with it. I'd recommend it to anyone.
I may not have been in the room at the time, but I got the Church newsletter that was sent out about it. Zeke was so pleased about his demon being cast out that he made sure people on four different continents got to see the proof of his Glory©! PRAISE!'
Oh. I may have inadvertently deleted it - I mistook it for yet another Viagra offer.
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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LBU Professor and Biblical Wordsmith Extraordinaire President of the Ex-Negro Academy Alumni Association Freehold Best Tan Award winner, 10 yrs running
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,048
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Chateau Lebeau (Freehold, Iowa)
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-25-2007, 01:12 PM
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Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
So you think you fit the 'big toy' criteria, huh?
I don't know....your behaviour seems to suggest......otherwise....
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I did not ask to be born with an oversized nigra tallywhacker!!! You're teasing is not appreciated. I wish I was born with a normal 4 inch full erect Godly tallywhacker instead of the monstrosity that I possess.
Be satisfied with your husbands 2 inch fully erect tallywhacker and stop harassing me for sexual favors!!!! It's never going to happen, Van Hellbound!!!
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Posts: 9,311
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-25-2007, 10:19 PM
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Originally Posted by lilith
" You see, this is what you're missing out on by not becoming a True Christian™!
Amazingly,I've learned to live with it. I'd recommend it to anyone.
I may not have been in the room at the time, but I got the Church newsletter that was sent out about it. Zeke was so pleased about his demon being cast out that he made sure people on four different continents got to see the proof of his Glory©! PRAISE!'
Oh. I may have inadvertently deleted it - I mistook it for yet another Viagra offer.
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You are doomed, witch. DOOMED! Do you know that?
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Night Hag
Forum Member
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Posts: 1,231
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Enzed
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-26-2007, 02:02 AM
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Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
You are doomed, witch. DOOMED! Do you know that?
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Jeez...sorry Al,didn't realise you wanted that Viagra offer.
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Posts: 9,311
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-26-2007, 03:55 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilith
Jeez...sorry Al,didn't realise you wanted that Viagra offer.
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I don't need it. I get free samples of all the newest stuff for beta testing.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Night Hag
Forum Member
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Posts: 1,231
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Enzed
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-27-2007, 02:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
I don't need it. I get free samples of all the newest stuff for beta testing.
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Aaaand...should we ask just what a pious Pastor might do with all those free samples?
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Posts: 9,311
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-27-2007, 05:18 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilith
Aaaand...should we ask just what a pious Pastor might do with all those free samples?
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I examine them to make sure they were not smuggled in from Canada.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Night Hag
Forum Member
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Posts: 1,231
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Enzed
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-28-2007, 02:53 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
I examine them to make sure they were not smuggled in from Canada.
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Of course you did.....oh look,another flock of flying pigs!
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Posts: 9,311
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-28-2007, 07:54 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilith
Of course you did.....oh look,another flock of flying pigs!
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You are going to carry that sassy line too far one of these days, MISSY! Didn't I order you off this GODLY site forever about three years ago?
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Night Hag
Forum Member
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Posts: 1,231
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Enzed
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Re: Landover once again at the forefront of education! -
08-29-2007, 02:19 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
You are going to carry that sassy line too far one of these days, MISSY! Didn't I order you off this GODLY site forever about three years ago?
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What - you mean that "banned for all eternity" thing?
Christianity says "turn the other cheek" if I'm not mistaken. Besides,JC wants me here.
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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