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Marijuana Makes You Gay -
08-19-2010, 12:44 AM
Brothers,
Praise Christ that True Christians™ are never tempted by the Devil's weed!
The results are in from Landover University. A carefully controlled double blind study in which half of the 20 male participants smoked oregano and the other half cannibis, a Schedule I narcotic.
The prinicpal finding of the study is that ingestion of THC, in any amount, lowers your inhibitions and self control. Men normally adverse to immoral conduct threw their conscience out the window after a bong hit.
In short, 100 percent of the uninhibited men that were stoned engaged in either autofellatio or sodomy. All ten men regretted the experience the next day. Most are in counseling and being tested for AIDS and rectumosis. They universally agree that it was marijuana that lead to the depravity and would not have engaged in such filth if not under the influence.
Praise Jesus Christ for the War on Drugs!
Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
08-19-2010, 05:56 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Harold Porter
In short, 100 percent of the uninhibited men that were stoned engaged in either autofellatio or sodomy.
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AUTOfellatio, Brother?
Does the marijuana also enhance flexibility? Or something else . . .
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Landover Senior Outreach Touching Men, Women and Children with the Good News!
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
08-19-2010, 07:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer
AUTOfellatio, Brother?
Does the marijuana also enhance flexibility? Or something else . . .
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Reverend,
This nasty substance doesn't actually increase flexibility. But one thing our study found is that, as proponents of its legalization suggest, it is a powerful anesthetic. Combined with the psychotic effect of suspending all morality, the over-articulation of the spine (that would normally be quite painful) is not an issue.
To be clear though, self-service was only observed in the subjects that were alone. All subjects indicated that wicked sodomy was the overwhelming preference while under the influence of the Devil.
Pray that this dangerous drug is completely eradicated!
Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
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Landover Senior Outreach Touching Men, Women and Children with the Good News!
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
08-19-2010, 11:53 PM
Brothers in Christ,
It is with a heavy heart that I disclose the clinical reports on the aftermath of the experiment.
Sadly, all ten men that participated in wicked self-fornication or savaged the colons of other men have been infected with the AIDS and acute rectumosis. I was at first skeptical of the reports. How could self-copulation or being a power top put one at risk of the disease?
As I gathered with the Sodomites in my office, they were in tears asking "why, why, why"? Of course, I turned to Scripture and quickly found the answer:
Quote:
"Wherefore doth a living man complain, a man for the punishment of his sins?" Lamentations 3:39 - KJV
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It is clear that God will righteously punish the gays with what they deserve.
So Brothers, the next time a heathen friend suggests that marijuana is a "harmless" narcotic, point them to my study before they suffer the same fate as these once healthy young men. An hour of being under the influence of Satan's weed lead to ruined rectums, disease and a lifetime of despair. I asked them if it was worth it?
I need to study the psychologists' reports before I can address the long term effects of cannibis-induced homosexuality.
In Christ!
Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
08-21-2010, 04:22 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Harold Porter
Brothers in Christ,
It is with a heavy heart that I disclose the clinical reports on the aftermath of the experiment.
Sadly, all ten men that participated in wicked self-fornication or savaged the colons of other men have been infected with the AIDS and acute rectumosis. I was at first skeptical of the reports. How could self-copulation or being a power top put one at risk of the disease?
As I gathered with the Sodomites in my office, they were in tears asking "why, why, why"? Of course, I turned to Scripture and quickly found the answer:
It is clear that God will righteously punish the gays with what they deserve.
So Brothers, the next time a heathen friend suggests that marijuana is a "harmless" narcotic, point them to my study before they suffer the same fate as these once healthy young men. An hour of being under the influence of Satan's weed lead to ruined rectums, disease and a lifetime of despair. I asked them if it was worth it?
I need to study the psychologists' reports before I can address the long term effects of cannibis-induced homosexuality.
In Christ!
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You are a funny man ,Brother Harold Porter. The quote is not an answer. Its just a quote.
I do not say cannabis and marihuana is without concern for your health, but it does not make you gay - just stoned.
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
08-21-2010, 04:45 PM
That's how they soften you up. (That's a euphemism).
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Landover Senior Outreach Touching Men, Women and Children with the Good News!
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
08-21-2010, 09:59 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Grapes
I do not say cannabis and marihuana is without concern for your health, but it does not make you gay - just stoned.
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In your case, marijuana would not make you gay because you are already a flaming bottom queen accustomed to foul sin with strange men every day, sober or under the influence. But our study has proven conclusively that men not already afflicted with gayness will certainly become rectum-ravaging Sodomites under the influence of this foul weed.
With God's grace, they will repent and their colons will heal. But the AIDS is their punishment from God and they must live the rest of their lives as the walking biohazard that they are.
You can be saved too if you come to Jesus. You'll always have the AIDS and likely need a permanent colostomy when your rectumosis becomes acute due to the constant abuse, but Jesus will love you anyway.
In Christ
Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
11-26-2015, 11:43 AM
And happy, and generally everything Christianity keeps away.
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
02-24-2011, 06:57 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Harold Porter
Brothers in Christ,
It is with a heavy heart that I disclose the clinical reports on the aftermath of the experiment.
Sadly, all ten men that participated in wicked self-fornication or savaged the colons of other men have been infected with the AIDS and acute rectumosis. I was at first skeptical of the reports. How could self-copulation or being a power top put one at risk of the disease?
As I gathered with the Sodomites in my office, they were in tears asking "why, why, why"? Of course, I turned to Scripture and quickly found the answer:
It is clear that God will righteously punish the gays with what they deserve.
So Brothers, the next time a heathen friend suggests that marijuana is a "harmless" narcotic, point them to my study before they suffer the same fate as these once healthy young men. An hour of being under the influence of Satan's weed lead to ruined rectums, disease and a lifetime of despair. I asked them if it was worth it?
I need to study the psychologists' reports before I can address the long term effects of cannibis-induced homosexuality.
In Christ!
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Brother Porter,
I'd be very excited to read your study on the queer-drug marijuana, where can I access your work?
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Landover Senior Outreach Touching Men, Women and Children with the Good News!
True Christian™
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
02-24-2011, 07:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by RepentingSinner
Brother Porter,
I'd be very excited to read your study on the queer-drug marijuana, where can I access your work?
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Uh huh. I bet you would. So you could twist, manipulate and dismiss my work because I am a man of God? Continue in your gleeful sodomy and advocate for the rectal rape of others?
In any event, the study will be available for sale once the peer review process is completed with my fellow True Scientists™. You will need a Paypal account to purchase.
In Christ
Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
09-20-2010, 07:25 AM
I honestly can say I advoid smoking pot for the reason that it stupid and uncool.
No Pot For Me Brothers.
Revelation 22:18 (KJV) The Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all. Amen
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
01-27-2011, 03:54 AM
Proof positive.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Landover Senior Outreach Touching Men, Women and Children with the Good News!
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
01-27-2011, 07:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
Proof positive.
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Thank you Pastor. Putrid filth, but it needs to be seen by those that would ingest the weed and then seek incestuous sodomy.
Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
02-05-2011, 07:53 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Harold Porter
Brothers,
Praise Christ that True Christians™ are never tempted by the Devil's weed!
The results are in from Landover University. A carefully controlled double blind study in which half of the 20 male participants smoked oregano and the other half cannibis, a Schedule I narcotic.
The prinicpal finding of the study is that ingestion of THC, in any amount, lowers your inhibitions and self control. Men normally adverse to immoral conduct threw their conscience out the window after a bong hit.
In short, 100 percent of the uninhibited men that were stoned engaged in either autofellatio or sodomy. All ten men regretted the experience the next day. Most are in counseling and being tested for AIDS and rectumosis. They universally agree that it was marijuana that lead to the depravity and would not have engaged in such filth if not under the influence.
Praise Jesus Christ for the War on Drugs!
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so your telling me in college those few doobies you smoked you sucked a fat one right after i knew this church was full of homos landover baptist church repent!!!! I am your salvation!!!
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
02-06-2011, 08:03 PM
I have never been interested in men while stoned. Just so you know we are focused completely on corrupting your fine young men and women. Come to the dark side it is much more fun. Don't worry you can use the death bed conversion and still get into heaven. Have all the fornication and drugs you want, God will forgive you at the end.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
02-06-2011, 08:12 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Unrepentant Pagan
I have never been interested in men while stoned. Just so you know we are focused completely on corrupting your fine young men and women. Come to the dark side it is much more fun. Don't worry you can use the death bed conversion and still get into heaven. Have all the fornication and drugs you want, God will forgive you at the end.
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Where does it say any of that in the Holy Bible, Miss Godmocker?
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Confirmed Enemy of God
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
02-08-2011, 12:04 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Harold Porter
Brothers,
Praise Christ that True Christians™ are never tempted by the Devil's weed!
The results are in from Landover University. A carefully controlled double blind study in which half of the 20 male participants smoked oregano and the other half cannibis, a Schedule I narcotic.
The prinicpal finding of the study is that ingestion of THC, in any amount, lowers your inhibitions and self control. Men normally adverse to immoral conduct threw their conscience out the window after a bong hit.
In short, 100 percent of the uninhibited men that were stoned engaged in either autofellatio or sodomy. All ten men regretted the experience the next day. Most are in counseling and being tested for AIDS and rectumosis. They universally agree that it was marijuana that lead to the depravity and would not have engaged in such filth if not under the influence.
Praise Jesus Christ for the War on Drugs!
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spell check broken on your end? this is one of the biggest piles of crap i have ever read. do you know you would have to be some kinda circus freak to perform autofellatio or be hung like a dag gone mule. and it is spelled "through".
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Landover Senior Outreach Touching Men, Women and Children with the Good News!
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
02-08-2011, 12:37 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by slippery slither
spell check broken on your end? this is one of the biggest piles of crap i have ever read. do you know you would have to be some kinda circus freak to perform autofellatio or be hung like a dag gone mule. and it is spelled "through".
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Wrong sissy.
Quote:
Threw.
to propel or cast in any way, especially to project or propel from the hand by a sudden forward motion or straightening of the arm and wrist: to throw a ball.
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Get saved or fry.
Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
02-08-2011, 09:31 PM
wow just signed up to comment on this thread, maruijuana makes people gay?
where the heck do you guys come up with this outlandish stuff
id love to meet some of you lunatics and pick your brains, i smoke marijuana and i have 2 kids and a happy marriage.
stop spreading lies and deceit through the words of God, you should all be ashamed of yourselves
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
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Re: Marijuana Makes You Gay -
02-08-2011, 09:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by dannylovesgod
wow just signed up to comment on this thread, maruijuana makes people gay?
where the heck do you guys come up with this outlandish stuff
id love to meet some of you lunatics and pick your brains, i smoke marijuana and i have 2 kids and a happy marriage.
stop spreading lies and deceit through the words of God, you should all be ashamed of yourselves
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Did you read the study? Smoke about three joints and you aren't going to stop another man from going down on you.
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