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  • #1

    Homer depravity reaches new lows!

    While researching homer behaviour for Christ, I was shocked and appalled to discover this description of genuine homer behaviour!
    Originally posted by Study of homer behaviour
    ...So Ed proved that it wasn't all that bad by calmly flipping his own **** onto the block and hammering a large sterilised, stainless steel needle through the ****head and into the wood. Then, with his **** still firmly attached, he leaned across and tacked down Jim's foreskin with two needles. Soon three needles similarly impaled Lee's scrotum. And finally Mark allowed Ed to nail his ****head to the block
    Can anyone still deny that homerism is caused by demon possession?
    O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



    God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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  • #2
    Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

    Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
    While researching homer behaviour for Christ, I was shocked and appalled to discover this description of genuine homer behaviour!
    Can anyone still deny that homerism is caused by demon possession?
    I DON'T WANT TO READ STUFF LIKE THAT! IT CAUSES MY **** TO SHRIVEL UP AND DISAPPEAR INTO MY ABDOMEN!
    Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
    "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
    Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


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    • #3
      Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

      Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
      I DON'T WANT TO READ STUFF LIKE THAT! IT CAUSES MY **** TO SHRIVEL UP AND DISAPPEAR INTO MY ABDOMEN!
      How many days a week do you read about these sorts of things, Pastor?

      (Okay Men, I am leaving. I say, leaving! Going out the door Right now!)

      Comment

      • #4
        Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

        Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
        While researching homer behaviour for Christ, I was shocked and appalled to discover this description of genuine homer behaviour!
        Can anyone still deny that homerism is caused by demon possession?
        That is right up their with the extreme piercing I have seen on Homers in their disgusting sex clubs. I tell them Jesus gave them wedding tackle to produce more Christian soldiers, not some place to store their spare bolts. There reply is always "you look hot with that hood sweetie" Jesus sick. I will do what it takes to win souls for Jesus but attacking 10lbs lead weights to my daddy sack is too much!

        Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

        Hot Must ReadThreads!


        Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

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        • #5
          Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

          Originally posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
          extreme piercing
          Just one more reason to keep Homer Simpson away from your John Thomas. He might whip out a tool kit and try to "install a few mods"!!

          Comment

          • #6
            Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

            Originally posted by OnYourKnees View Post
            Just one more reason to keep Homer Simpson away from your John Thomas. He might whip out a tool kit and try to "install a few mods"!!

            Trust me they try that and more to you when you try to spread Christ's Holy Word(r) in thier sin pits.

            Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

            Hot Must ReadThreads!


            Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

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            • #7
              Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

              Originally posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
              Trust me they try that and more to you when you try to spread Christ's Holy Word(r) in thier sin pits.
              Perhaps I'll stick to the truck stops and bus stations for a little while longer. Unless you'd care to go witnessing with me, B-J.

              While all the safety I need I get by walking with Jesus, they say there are greater potentials for mass conversion with a tag-team partner.

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              • #8
                Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

                EEEEEW.

                This topic is disgusting. Remove it, Jesus!
                The Lord is a man of war: the Lord is his name.
                Exodus 15:3

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                • #9
                  Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

                  I myself prefer to do MY research on the female version of sodomites: aka lezbeans. Especially young ones. Who may still have a chance of being Saved.
                  Who Will Jesus Damn?

                  Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                  Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                  Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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                  • #10
                    Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

                    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                    I myself prefer to do MY research on the female version of sodomites: aka lezbeans. Especially young ones. Who may still have a chance of being Saved.
                    As I understand it, males putting tallywhackers into each other's heinies is an abomination unto the Lord, and therefore they are basically assured eternal damnation, but I think more research needs to be done into the leez-beans, Exactly how damned are they? Are they an abomination unto the Lord, or merely a minor annoyance, like a small splinter in His Toe?

                    Perhaps this is a topic for another Doctorate study....
                    Trump 2020: "For Real This Time"

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                    • #11
                      Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

                      Originally posted by Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S. View Post
                      As I understand it, males putting tallywhackers into each other's heinies is an abomination unto the Lord, and therefore they are basically assured eternal damnation, but I think more research needs to be done into the leez-beans, Exactly how damned are they? Are they an abomination unto the Lord, or merely a minor annoyance, like a small splinter in His Toe?

                      Perhaps this is a topic for another Doctorate study....
                      Alright then, what if "homers" don't engage in penetration--are they right with the Lord then?
                      Tir'd, and despairing, O celestial maid,
                      I'm caught, I cry'd, without thy heav'nly aid.
                      Help me, Diana, help a nymph forlorn,
                      Devoted to the woods, who long has worn
                      Thy livery, and long thy quiver born.                       - Ovid

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                      • #12
                        Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

                        Originally posted by Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S. View Post
                        As I understand it, males putting tallywhackers into each other's heinies is an abomination unto the Lord, and therefore they are basically assured eternal damnation, but I think more research needs to be done into the leez-beans, Exactly how damned are they? Are they an abomination unto the Lord, or merely a minor annoyance, like a small splinter in His Toe?
                        An excellent question, Doctor! One which Paul addresses in his Epistle to the Romans:

                        even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature (Romans 1:26)

                        But can we blame the girls?! They had no choice, seeings as how the Eternal City, at the time, was infested with a homerism rivaling that of Sodom, West Hollywood, and the epicenter of Persian pedophilia, Mashhad. The Lord Jesus teaches us love, Dr. Vile, and Christ's love of heterosexuality is what drives us to preach -- and preach again even as it hurts -- the glistening, giddy joy seen in a former lesbian's upturned face, smeared and dripping with the peace that passes understanding. I think you'll agree.
                        sigpic

                        I loved Newt before Newt was invincible

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                        • #13
                          Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

                          Originally posted by tommy View Post
                          EEEEEW.

                          This topic is disgusting. Remove it, Jesus!
                          Seeing Tommy's post, with that particular choice of icon, makes me wonder. Perhaps these fellows are working up to following in Jesus(tm)' footsteps, for the most extreme piercing of all?

                          And Tommy, please don't command our Lord and Savior to do things for you. Remember your "please" and "thank you".

                          Originally posted by Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S. View Post
                          AsI think more research needs to be done into the leez-beans, Exactly how damned are they? Are they an abomination unto the Lord, or merely a minor annoyance, like a small splinter in His Toe?
                          I'd wager Lezbeans like Dita von Teese are closer to a splinter in His donkey's toe, or perhaps that of His camel!

                          Rosie O'Donnell, on the other hand . . .

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                          • #14
                            Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

                            Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
                            I DON'T WANT TO READ STUFF LIKE THAT! IT CAUSES MY **** TO SHRIVEL UP AND DISAPPEAR INTO MY ABDOMEN!
                            Like you have a dick to begin with...
                            "I do not go where the path leads. I instead create my own path ... and leave a snail trail."

                            Moderatio est Figmentum

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              Re: Homer depravity reaches new lows!

                              Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
                              While researching homer behaviour for Christ, I was shocked and appalled to discover this description of genuine homer behaviour!
                              Can anyone still deny that homerism is caused by demon possession?
                              What a disgusting SINFUL ABOMINATION!! Brother there is NO DOUBT that homerism and many other VILE SINS on this planet are caused by DEMON POSSESSION!!
                              Evangelist for Jesus and The Word!!

                              "Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves." Matthew 7:15

                              "Prayer should be your first resource. Not your last resort!!"

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