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True Christian™ Nitric Oxide
True Christian™
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Posts: 3,477
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Biblical Pick Up Lines -
01-30-2007, 05:26 PM
Friends, the Bible (KJV1611) is the source of inspiration for all.
I'm including some of the divinely inspired words used in the Bible; for... um... picking up chicks.
Luke 1:30 And the angel said unto her, Fear not, Mary: for thou hast found favour with God.
31 And, behold, thou shalt conceive in thy womb, and bring forth a son, and shalt call his name JESUS.
Next time you are out attempting to woo that special True Christian ™ woman. Try that line that Gabriel used on Mary.
"Fear not, for thou hast found favour with Brother V"
The only time this line was used, what was the answer?
Luke 1:38 And Mary said, Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word. And the angel departed from her.
Praise Jesus. Used once, works every time!
Feel free to post your favorite Biblical Pick Up Lines. Also, show the results of these passages.
(Song of Solomon is a great place to start)
YIC
V
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Ladies of Landover Senior VP One of the Truest Christians™ Ever Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
True Christian™
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Posts: 12,662
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Standing behind my husband
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Re: Biblical Pick Up Lines -
01-30-2007, 05:44 PM
I know what would work with me.
"Hello. I am a True Christian™ gentleman, and I would like to take your hand in marriage so we can make and raise many little True Christian™ soldiers for Christ."
It's guaranteed to work once, and that will be for life.
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True Christian™ Nitric Oxide
True Christian™
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Posts: 3,477
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Re: Biblical Pick Up Lines -
01-30-2007, 06:00 PM
The story of how Jacob meets Rachel and woo's her is so very touching to me also.
Genesis 29:9 And while he yet spake with them, Rachel came with her father's sheep; for she kept them.
10 And it came to pass, when Jacob saw Rachel the daughter of Laban his mother's brother, and the sheep of Laban his mother's brother, that Jacob went near, and rolled the stone from the well's mouth, and watered the flock of Laban his mother's brother.
11 And Jacob kissed Rachel, and lifted up his voice, and wept.
12 And Jacob told Rachel that he was her father's brother, and that he was Rebekah's son: and she ran and told her father.
*note, this method would work well at a family reunion*
This may not technically be a pick up line, but the actions were all done to woo her.
PRAISE JESUS!!!
YIC
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God Squad
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Biblical Pick Up Lines -
01-31-2007, 12:01 PM
This should work, just change the names to make them appropriate.
Genisis 34
8": And Hamor communed with them, saying, The soul of my son Shechem longeth for your daughter: I pray you give her him to wife.
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
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Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Biblical Pick Up Lines -
01-31-2007, 02:20 PM
God in His infinite wisdom hasn't blessed everyone with enough of the gift of gab to use pickup lines, so He has provided other ways to find a wife:
Exodus 21:7-11: And if a man sell his daughter to be a maidservant, she shall not go out as the menservants do. If she please not her master, who hath betrothed her to himself, then shall he let her be redeemed: to sell her unto a strange nation he shall have no power, seeing he hath dealt deceitfully with her. And if he have betrothed her unto his son, he shall deal with her after the manner of daughters. If he take him another [wife]; her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage, shall he not diminish. And if he do not these three unto her, then shall she go out free without money.
Deuteronomy 21:10-14: When thou goest forth to war against thine enemies, and the LORD thy God hath delivered them into thine hands, and thou hast taken them captive, And seest among the captives a beautiful woman, and hast a desire unto her, that thou wouldest have her to thy wife; Then thou shalt bring her home to thine house; and she shall shave her head, and pare her nails; And she shall put the raiment of her captivity from off her, and shall remain in thine house, and bewail her father and her mother a full month: and after that thou shalt go in unto her, and be her husband, and she shall be thy wife. And it shall be, if thou have no delight in her, then thou shalt let her go whither she will; but thou shalt not sell her at all for money, thou shalt not make merchandise of her, because thou hast humbled her.
This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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True Christian™ Theologian
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Re: Biblical Pick Up Lines -
01-31-2007, 04:09 PM
No pickup lines, but some other quotes regarding wifes do come to mind.
Praise Jesus for the infinite wisdom that can be found in the Holy Bible!
It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.
Proverbs 21:19
A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband:
But she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.
Proverbs 12:4
If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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