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The Freehold Truth and Light Baptist newspaper Featured editorials, letters to the GODLY Pastors of Landover, local news, advise columns.

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Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
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Default Re: $$$Reward for lost pet$$$ - 05-04-2016, 09:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Des View Post
Rufus the weasel, lost on or about April 26.


Color: Rust with white underbelly.


Size: About a foot long.


Answers to Rufus by looking in your direction, hissing, and continuing to do whatever he was doing.


Likes: Chickens, eggs, electrical wires, rabbits, kittens, shiny things.


Dislikes: Everything else.


Last seen: I had him with me in Bangkok, and am certain he was crawling around in Mariko's handbag while we were touring CERN. Haven't seen him since.


If found, please do not approach. Toss him a chicken neck or your car keys & call me immediately.


$500 reward if alive.


God bless.
Is this him?







“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Default Re: $$$Reward for lost pet$$$ - 05-04-2016, 10:04 PM

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Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
Is this him?


Not him, Brother. He is a bit longer than that one.


Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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Default Re: $$$Reward for lost pet$$$ - 05-05-2016, 10:00 AM

Could this be him?


Draft Freehold, Iowa Mayor
Johny Joe Hold
for President in 2024
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Default Re: $$$Reward for lost pet$$$ - 05-05-2016, 10:18 AM

No, but that one has the same friendly face as Rufus. Is it for sale?


Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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Default Re: $$$Reward for lost pet$$$ - 05-05-2016, 02:54 PM

I am very sorry you have lost your pet, Rufus. If I see him, or any weasel for that matter. I will contact you immediately.


John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
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Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
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One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Christian Love Real American™ Tithing Manager Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Senior Pastor Teabag Patriot TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Eats the Most Pork True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Nuts for JESUS! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Mower Donald Trump 2016! Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Bathfire Crown of Life Alternative Facts Probing for Jesus 20,000 posts Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
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Default Re: $$$Reward for lost pet$$$ - 05-05-2016, 03:04 PM

As you all go in search of the pet, always remember that a weasel is weasily distinguished from a stoat that is stoatally different.





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Default Re: $$$Reward for lost pet$$$ - 05-08-2016, 09:24 AM

I thought I saw him but it was just Ted Cruz being passed over by Jesus for the nice Mr Trump.

There will be Trump-ets, soon!


1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
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Default Re: $$$Reward for lost pet$$$ - 06-27-2016, 04:48 AM

Please try this ***Catholic porn link removed*** app. It's a great ***Another Catholic porn link removed*** app.
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Default Re: $$$Reward for lost pet$$$ - 06-27-2016, 05:02 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by RyanWilliam View Post
[...]
How do you suppose this will get Des´ friendly companion back? Perhaps you merely try to hurt his feelings? If you are, you´re not making friends here. Who are you anyway? This forum has a place where you can introduce yourself (which is a polite thing to do when you show your face for the first time). Please be so courteous to make your own thread to tell us a bit more about yourself.

Kind regards,

Roland


Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.

Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.
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