Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > The introduction forum
Reload this Page King James 1611!
The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#21)
Old
KJV4me's Avatar
KJV4me KJV4me is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member
 
Posts: 80
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In His word
KJV4me is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.KJV4me is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: King James 1611! - 04-14-2008, 11:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Offcr. Albert Martin View Post
Why do they call you "Unsaved Trash"?
Because I am new to the Landover Baptist Forums, and am not yet an official member of the Landover Baptist Church. Also, my PayPal is not yet set up and consequently I have not yet established a regular tithing schedule. But I'm working on fixing that quickly.

I aim to fix my unsaved trashiness through proving my knowledge of, and adherence to, the KJV 1611, God's Holy Word, and setting up my regular tithing schedule posthaste.

But when Cathlicky pagan homers like you spew vomit all over my threads, especially my intro thread, it only slows my path to LBC acceptance and true salvation.

Although you obviously don't care whether or not you burn in Hell, I do. So if you could stop from ruining my chances at joining the One True Church and achieving salvation, I would appreciate it very much. As I said before, this is serious business.
Reply With Quote
(#22)
Old
Justina Thyme's Avatar
Justina Thyme Justina Thyme is offline
Exposing DEMONS for Jesus
True Christian™

Saved 1 Year Real American™ True Christian™ Silver Tither True Christian Lady Christian Love Best stoning bucket Protected by JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian TC Bravery Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth

 
Posts: 1,705
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: On a long, strange trip
Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: King James 1611! - 04-14-2008, 11:19 PM

Even though I owe you nothing, through my True Christian™ compassion I have decided to reply to your post even before that of a righteous gentleman like KJV1611 because you certainly need this information more quickly and urgently than he does:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Offcr. Albert Martin View Post
Does Kermit the Frog count? I am a BIG Muppets fan.

http://www.demonbuster.com/idols.html

How about X the Owl? (I'm a HUGE Mr. Rogers fan-LBC doesn't like him because he preached that God loves everyone just the way they are)

http://www.demonbuster.com/idols.html

Do images of the Sacred Heart count?

http://www.demonbuster.com/idols.html

Frequently mentioned in the Bible as God's messengers. Why do you forbid them, "bible believers"?

Anything that becomes a fad has probably got a demonic background; angel statues, for instance, started by the New Agers.

The Miami Dolphins? My son's a huge fan!

Dolphins are said to possess nearly human intelligence. This is an abomination.

Guilty as charged. Ya know, God uses them to show His glory (these Japanese inventors have 24th century technology)
The people in these countries follow heathen religions and worship false gods.

What wrong is there in that so long as we don't bow down to or worship them? (We don't pray to the images of Jesus and the saints, but the people they represent).

We believe that you should NOT have any, and that it could be a form of idolatry. Exodus 20:4 "You shall not make yourself any graven image [to worship it] or any likeness of anything that is in the heavens above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.")

They may have originated there, but it doesn't matter what things started as, it's what they are now.

http://www.demonbuster.com/dolls.html


?

http://www.demonbuster.com/paisley.html

History has long forgotten the godess-Nobody believes in her anymore.

The point is that this was a false religion.

Even the ones who stay faithful to the Lord?

There is no such thing as a True Christian™ celebrity. There are too many temptations in their paths, and human flesh is weak.

Remember the story of Noah's Ark?
Rainbows became a fad started by New Agers.
And what is so evil about ancestors?

Certain objects passed down from them may retain their sins and thus be cursed.

To me, it's just a symbol of the Trinity-three leaves on the stem, three Persons in one God.

They are used as good luck charms and are therefore superstition, a form of witchcraft.


None with me, Ma'am!

If this is an attempt at humor, I suggest you try something else.

I have none of these, but I bet you wanted to add "Any Bible other than the KJV1611"...I have almost every other one!

The answer here should be obvious, even to you.

What is so evil about them by nature? You're not superstitious enough to believe in "evil sounds," are you?

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showp...65&postcount=1

What's so evil about flamingos?

FLAMINGO (bird) - Got this from Public TV - According to African myth, the Phoenix (Egyptian god) was on fire in a volcano fire. When the fire died down, in the ashes, was the Flamingo. Flamingo's are called "The Fire Bird". Phoenicians believed Flamingo feathers would bring immortality. Their diet causes their red color.

I'm not technologically impaired-you must be thinking about the Amish.

SUNDIAL - Found this advertisement - "Sundial is a symbol of eternal life, spirit of eternal love." Maybe you need to get rid of yours, and dial the SON.

The only tapes I own are by Scott Hahn, Patrick Madrid, Jeff Cavins, Fr. John Corapi and people like them.

Records and tapes all fall in the category of things which have been often loaded with evil spiritual power. These people are representatives of false religions.

What makes an Italian horn different from a regular one?

It is called a cornuto and is used for protection from the evil eye.

The Star of Bethlehem too?

That Star is Biblical and is therefore not included.

Whenever I'm eating chicken or turkey, I save it until I get somebody to help with the wishbone.

You would do well to not touch that object, much less make a wish on it. This is a form of witchcraft.

When I go to Eucharistic Adoration to adore Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament, my brother dispenses incense on the crowd (I try not to cough)


II. Objects of idolatry. The sun and moon were early selected as outward symbols of all-pervading power, and the worship of the heavenly bodies was not only the most ancient but the most prevalent system of idolatry. Taking its rise in the plains of Chaldea, it spread through Egypt, Greece, Scythia, and even Mexico and Ceylon. Deuteronomy 4:10; 17:3; Job 31:20-28. In the later times of the monarchy, the planets or the zodiacal signs received, next to the sun and moon, their share of popular adoration. 2 Kings 23:5. Beast worship, as exemplified in the calves of Jeroboam, has already been alluded to. Of pure hero worship among the Semitic races we find no trace. The singular reverence with which trees have been honored is not without example is the history of the Hebrews. The terebinth (oak) at Mamre, beneath which Abraham built an altar, Genesis 12:7; 13:18, and the memorial grove planted by him at Beersheba, Genesis 21:33, were intimately connected with patriarchal worship. Mountains and high places were chosen spots for offering sacrifice and incense to idols, I Kings 11:7; 14:23; and the retirement of gardens and the thick shade of woods offered great attractions to their worshipers. 2 Kings 16:4; Isaiah 1:29; Hosea 4:13. The host of heaven was worshiped on the house-top. 2 Kings 23:12; Jeremiah 19:3; 32:29; Zephaniah 1:5.


It is a symbol of the Lord's Resurrection!

Many symbols are of demonic origin: Fleur-de-Lis - Britannica Encyclopedia gives this explanation. In India and in Egypt it was common decorating device used as a symbol of life and resurrection, the attribute of the god Horus.

I need to reload my printer to print out your arrest warrants!
Perhaps you should print one out for yourself from satan.


Mark 16:17 And these attesting signs will accompany those who believe: in My Name they will drive out demons.

1 Kings 21:14 Then they sent to Jezebel, saying, Naboth is stoned . . .

A SPIRITUAL WARFARE PRAYER:
Father, In Jesus' Name, I take the Blood of Jesus and break the power of all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, wiccans, pagans, and any other source, and all of their rituals off of us. With the Blood of Jesus, I erase all evil lines drawn on our liver. . .

LANDOVER BAPTIST DEMON HUNTING PERMIT #00666-27





Reply With Quote
(#23)
Old
Offcr. Albert Martin's Avatar
Offcr. Albert Martin Offcr. Albert Martin is offline
Unsaved Meter Maid
 
 
Posts: 250
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Iowa....or Maryland
Offcr. Albert Martin is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: King James 1611! - 04-14-2008, 11:27 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
They don't, Rita.
Rita? Why "Rita?"


Former member of a church which I cannot dare mention-Now a spiritual free agent-could LBC be the way for me?
Reply With Quote
(#24)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: King James 1611! - 04-14-2008, 11:31 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Offcr. Albert Martin View Post
Rita? Why "Rita?"
I suppose because it rhymes with your job title.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#25)
Old
Justina Thyme's Avatar
Justina Thyme Justina Thyme is offline
Exposing DEMONS for Jesus
True Christian™

Saved 1 Year Real American™ True Christian™ Silver Tither True Christian Lady Christian Love Best stoning bucket Protected by JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian TC Bravery Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth

 
Posts: 1,705
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: On a long, strange trip
Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: King James 1611! - 04-14-2008, 11:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by KJV4me View Post
[/font]
Oh no, I can't believe it, but I am guitly of possessing some items on your list. Specifically, I have some items from JAPAN

I have a Toshiba DVD player and a Mitsubishi television set. Although I promise that I only use these items to watch Biblical-based educational and worship programs. I just never realized until now that Toshiba and Mitsubishi are Jap companies, although I should have given their foreign-sounding names.

BOYCE and BOICE are two demons that can possess interfere with any electronic equipment, i.e., phone, computer, printer, automobile. Command these two demons to leave your equipment in the name of Jesus. We get many emails saying this worked.

Oh my goodness it gets worse! I have a full-size movie poster depicting Charlton Heston in the movie The Ten Commandments.

What should I do about this? Are these crimes in the eyes of Our Lord? Please let me know!
My best advice to you, KJV1611, would be to burn the poster, especially as it contains a likeness of Moses, who was a real man who carried out the word of the LORD. The movie is a product of Hellywood, and nothing untainted has ever come from that iniquitous piece of hell on earth.



Mark 16:17 And these attesting signs will accompany those who believe: in My Name they will drive out demons.

1 Kings 21:14 Then they sent to Jezebel, saying, Naboth is stoned . . .

A SPIRITUAL WARFARE PRAYER:
Father, In Jesus' Name, I take the Blood of Jesus and break the power of all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, wiccans, pagans, and any other source, and all of their rituals off of us. With the Blood of Jesus, I erase all evil lines drawn on our liver. . .

LANDOVER BAPTIST DEMON HUNTING PERMIT #00666-27





Reply With Quote
(#26)
Old
Offcr. Albert Martin's Avatar
Offcr. Albert Martin Offcr. Albert Martin is offline
Unsaved Meter Maid
 
 
Posts: 250
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Iowa....or Maryland
Offcr. Albert Martin is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: King James 1611! - 04-15-2008, 12:22 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Justina Thyme View Post
My best advice to you, KJV1611, would be to burn the poster, especially as it contains a likeness of Moses, who was a real man who carried out the word of the LORD. The movie is a product of Hellywood, and nothing untainted has ever come from that iniquitous piece of hell on earth.

Not even The Passion of the Christ?


Former member of a church which I cannot dare mention-Now a spiritual free agent-could LBC be the way for me?
Reply With Quote
(#27)
Old
Pastor Isaac Peters's Avatar
Pastor Isaac Peters Pastor Isaac Peters is offline
Senior Pastor
Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
Always Biblically correct
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Publisher's Choice True Heterosexual™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Tithing Manager Christian Love Ex-Mary Worshipper Long service medal, 2nd class Senior Pastor Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture Ex-liberal True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork Outreach preacher True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Anti-sodomy Hands Off Crown of Glory Probing for Jesus Alternative Facts Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: King James 1611! - 04-15-2008, 12:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Offcr. Albert Martin View Post
Not even The Passion of the Christ?
If it has anything to do with Mel Gibson, you should pray the demons off of it. Gibson belongs to a "traditionalist Catholic" cult that regards the Pope as not damned enough to be a proper Romanist leader. Gibson has even criticized our Divinely hand-picked President's liberation of Iraq.


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

Reply With Quote
(#28)
Old
KJV4me's Avatar
KJV4me KJV4me is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member
 
Posts: 80
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In His word
KJV4me is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.KJV4me is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: King James 1611! - 04-15-2008, 03:17 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Justina Thyme View Post
My best advice to you, KJV1611, would be to burn the poster, especially as it contains a likeness of Moses, who was a real man who carried out the word of the LORD. The movie is a product of Hellywood, and nothing untainted has ever come from that iniquitous piece of hell on earth.
Thank you, Justina Thyme. Just a few moments ago I had my wife pull down the poster, and then I doused it in kerosene and lit it ablaze in the fireplace. I can also assure you that I will not allow this kind of transgression to occur in my house again.
Reply With Quote
(#29)
Old
KJV4me's Avatar
KJV4me KJV4me is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member
 
Posts: 80
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In His word
KJV4me is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.KJV4me is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: King James 1611! - 04-15-2008, 03:18 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Offcr. Albert Martin View Post
Not even The Passion of the Christ?
Although that movie is about Our Lord Jesus Christ, it was directed by a Cathylick, so I have refrained from obtaining the film pending guidance from the Landover Baptist Church staff.
Reply With Quote
(#30)
Old
Justina Thyme's Avatar
Justina Thyme Justina Thyme is offline
Exposing DEMONS for Jesus
True Christian™

Saved 1 Year Real American™ True Christian™ Silver Tither True Christian Lady Christian Love Best stoning bucket Protected by JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian TC Bravery Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth

 
Posts: 1,705
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: On a long, strange trip
Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.Justina Thyme has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: King James 1611! - 04-15-2008, 06:40 AM

Good for you, KJV4me. Only in this way shall you be cleansed of your DEMONS and your sins.


Mark 16:17 And these attesting signs will accompany those who believe: in My Name they will drive out demons.

1 Kings 21:14 Then they sent to Jezebel, saying, Naboth is stoned . . .

A SPIRITUAL WARFARE PRAYER:
Father, In Jesus' Name, I take the Blood of Jesus and break the power of all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, wiccans, pagans, and any other source, and all of their rituals off of us. With the Blood of Jesus, I erase all evil lines drawn on our liver. . .

LANDOVER BAPTIST DEMON HUNTING PERMIT #00666-27





Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved