Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum A Christian Help Forum led by Sister Daisy Mae Johnson. Warning! Sometimes the Lord's advice is a hard pill to swallow. |
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Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
02-28-2015, 09:11 PM
Hi all!
I had a question for those of you who have colored help for your house. How did you go about acquiring them? An agency? Or a referral? Franklin and I are currently having trouble finding a good Negress who will not backtalk or steal.
Our last one (We couldn't pronounce her name, so Franklin and I both referred to her as Earl) just ran away after we caught her stealing my after-dinner wig. Franklin went to get his throwing rocks, but she was gone before he could return. Just like a gorilla running through the dark of night. This is the third one we have lost in 5 months.
THank you all for your help!
Walking with Christ,
Pearl
Just a loving, saved, MARRIED HETEROSEXUAL couple sharing this account! Wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww Hi Carol, not sure why the Face book isn't typing out my letters, LOL. I hope you can see this message, none of the letters are going in the box. Maybe they are invisible? We do not really understand Computers or Technology. I will have to ask Anita about this. See you tomor
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
02-28-2015, 09:49 PM
I always get mine at the annual Freehold Nigro Auction. But there can never be a guarantee as to their honesty, or lack thereof. Sometimes the more stupid they are, the better they are, as they'll just steal stuff from your trash can, or steal what the cat brought home, rather than stealing anything valuable.
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
02-28-2015, 10:11 PM
You have a difficult task. My only advice is to try to stick to country Negroes. They often have some small amount of respectful attitude toward their betters. City Negroes will find a lawyer and sue you if they are chastised over missing articles.
God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
02-28-2015, 10:23 PM
Hello Pearl - how lovely to see you again! I'd wondered where you were, but I guess your problems with getting help have kept you busy.
I can't really advise you on getting colored help, because I live in an area which is about 99% non-colored. But this means that my dear husband Matthew has had to think "outside the box" (as the "cool kids" say ) and as a result much of our help is from the Polak regions.
Maybe you could consider these people? They are very grateful for the work, especially the ones who arrived in Britain illegally before their countries joined the Godless European Union. Agnieszka (I have no idea how to pronounce it - we call her Aggie) arrived here in about 2002, before it was legal, and her passport expired some time ago. She's a good worker, as long as you don't expect her to cook.
I'm sure there must be even more Polaks, Slovaks, Bulgars and the like in the USA? Compared with the colored folk, we find them quite clean.
I wish you and Franklin all the best,
YiC
Joanna
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
02-28-2015, 10:26 PM
Like most responsible Plantation owners, I breed my own. Usually, I have some of the young Hutchins kids watch over the process and try and get a 4H ribbon. I have to admit, I do get a little help from God and Monsanto.
This one here is one of the better ones. This boy can hoe and spit watermelon seeds like no ones business!
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-01-2015, 01:28 AM
I'm a bit of a renegade, I suppose. I've used Chinks instead of Yard Apes for most of my adult life. My daddy kept Beaners, packing them like sardines into single-wide tornado magnets on his ranch in Texas. But for some reason, I found the Gooks more docile, especially the female ones.
Sure, they are small. You have to harness six of them to a plow in order to get the work out of them that you would just a pair of big Bucks, but they are a lot easier to feed. Rice is cheap as dirt, and they seem to thrive on it.
They are fairly easy to get, as well. They'll come pouring out of massage parlors at closing time, and you can lure stragglers over by waving money or a designer handbag at them. If you happen to travel, you can pick them up for a few bucks in several of the Chinese states. I've bought them from the states of Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia, and Thailand myself, though shipping them home can be problematic if you don't own a yacht.
If you are looking for really healthy ones, contact the Chinese state of Japan and have them ship them to you by way of the 'Student Exchange Program'. The process is a little complicated, and you need to create a believable fake address that can't be traced back to you, but the reward is well worth the effort. You won't find a healthier Gook than you can pick up though the Exchange.
And the best part about the Exchange is that you get to trade your used and worn out merchandise back to them at equal value! Those Nips are really dumb that way.
Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-01-2015, 05:56 PM
Hi all,
You are all wonderful, and have given excellent advice! Franklin and I will be sure to sit down (and pray we can get back up! LOL ) to look over our options.
We are pretty sure that we would like to continue with our tradition of the help being a Negress, but I suppose we could experiment with other ethnicity.
I do really enjoy the suggestion to raise our own coloreds. Franklin and I reared emus about 15 years ago, and still have some of the larger cages out back. That would be perfect.
Thank you all again! GOD bless!
Walking with Christ,
Parl
Just a loving, saved, MARRIED HETEROSEXUAL couple sharing this account! Wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww Hi Carol, not sure why the Face book isn't typing out my letters, LOL. I hope you can see this message, none of the letters are going in the box. Maybe they are invisible? We do not really understand Computers or Technology. I will have to ask Anita about this. See you tomor
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-01-2015, 06:07 PM
Pearl, raising the darkies not much more work than raising chickens, they even live in the same type of building. From 1,000 feet away, they even sound like chickens, what with the ebonics and all.
My wife, Mrs. Hutchins sometimes brings some of the young male ones in the house (after a through delousing and wash that she does, bless her heart) and puts them in our bed an hour before I retire. She watches them as they heat up the sheets so there is no chill when I get in. They they do drool a bit and it is not uncommon for me to find a pool of it in the bad, requiring my wife to put on fresh sheets.
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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True Christians™
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-01-2015, 06:28 PM
Oh, my! Thank you for the information, Mr. Hutchins! I had no idea coloreds had so many uses. The bed warmer idea is great, LOL. I wish there was some sort of book that listed ideas. Something like "101 Uses for Your Colored Help". But your tips really got this old brain thinking! LOL.
I do have a question though. Do they ever breed on their own, or do they usually know to wait til we tell them to reproduce? I do not know exactly what slithers out of their wombs and do not want to be surprised.
THank you again!
Just a loving, saved, MARRIED HETEROSEXUAL couple sharing this account! Wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww Hi Carol, not sure why the Face book isn't typing out my letters, LOL. I hope you can see this message, none of the letters are going in the box. Maybe they are invisible? We do not really understand Computers or Technology. I will have to ask Anita about this. See you tomor
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-01-2015, 06:49 PM
Coloreds can do most anything. You just have to be patient, have your whip and repeat the same commands, over and over. I've found holding a KJV Bible in one hand and prefacing everything with a "...and God Almighty Commands YOU!!!' to work wonders.
Good question about how they breed.
The nigresses will breed with just about anything. They tip over and welcome near any passing creature so it is important to keep them separated (the males from the females). I've found they 'make eyes' at a favorite buck and it is important to break them of this. Tying the buck to a stake and beating until unconscious works wonders. I've also found it toughens the bucks skin so when running through brambles, there is less skin left on them. Skin on brambles is hard on a hunting dog, it confuses them.
When I have a nigrees and a buck I want to breed, I put them in a room and I'll monitor them. I sit on a wing back chain in a corner with a snifter of brandy and 'let them go at it like savages'. Occasionally I'll have to use a cattle prod to get the beasts separated when I am done.
A lot of the male ones will 'go on the down low' though I do not find this to be a problem as it tends to keep them regular. It is not like any of them are going to go to Heaven. Sometimes, I have to use the prod on them when I am done too.
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-01-2015, 10:45 PM
Brother Hutchins, do you have a problem with inbreeding amongst your stock? I am not a professional breeder by any means, but I tried my hand at negroe husbandry briefly several years back. Obviously, I was breeding for large penises strong backs and small brains, but I had real trouble keeping members of the same family group from foiling my efforts by vexatiously fornicating with, and impregnating, one and other...with abominable results.
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-02-2015, 12:14 AM
One advice is getting help from the unsaved black section of your church. In mine, we have a special section for those negros who are still unsaved but trying to reach for heaven. Getting them to work for you is a piece of cake, after all I'm the wife of the senior pastor!
"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-02-2015, 01:53 AM
The nigresses are permanently on heat.They tend to use pregnancy as an excuse not to work hard, so keep them away from all males (including the young ones) except when you want to breed them. I've found that when you've finished your breeding program with one of them, that it's best to get her spayed.Then if she finds her way to rendezvous with a male, she'll have no excuse not to work double shifts.
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-02-2015, 02:06 AM
One option that hasn't been mentioned would be to use Mexicans. They are, sadly, plentiful in most areas these days. Mexicans will generally work for about ten dollars a day and do three times as much work as a Negroe. If you feed them beans, rice and possibly a little chicken skin, they will stay just about forever, precluding the need to find new ones. They hardly ever wear out, but it is best to keep them away from the alcohol, as they become surly when in their cups.
God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-02-2015, 06:01 AM
Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson, that is a wonderful idea!! Thank you!!
And Brother Alvin, your idea is wonderful as well! I generally do not cook for the help, because I have noticed that the Negroes are very loud eaters, and even though I always make my help eat in our coat closet if they cannot go 10 hours without food, we often can still hear their chewing. If the Hispanspics are quiet eaters, I would consider giving them rice and beans.
My, what an exciting 'thread'!!! I had no idea I would be receiving so many helpful replies! Franklin and I were at such a loss. Thankfully, the LORD told me to write this post for help. GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!9!!!
Walking with Christ,
Pearl
Just a loving, saved, MARRIED HETEROSEXUAL couple sharing this account! Wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww Hi Carol, not sure why the Face book isn't typing out my letters, LOL. I hope you can see this message, none of the letters are going in the box. Maybe they are invisible? We do not really understand Computers or Technology. I will have to ask Anita about this. See you tomor
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-02-2015, 12:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer
Brother Hutchins, do you have a problem with inbreeding amongst your stock? I am not a professional breeder by any means, but I tried my hand at negroe husbandry briefly several years back. Obviously, I was breeding for large penises strong backs and small brains, but I had real trouble keeping members of the same family group from foiling my efforts by vexatiously fornicating with, and impregnating, one and other...with abominable results.
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I really could not tell you. They all look the same to me and as everyone knows, they all are as dumb as a sock full of rocks so I do not think they suffer the same problems as when a father lovingly provides a daughter with Gods Gift of Maternal Life®.
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-06-2015, 01:13 PM
Pearl, my dear husband Matthew has pointed out that in the absence of colored help, it is sometimes possible to get what he calls white coloreds (that sounds like a recipe for disaster in a washing machine, doesn't it? )
For example, our lawn boy is from an African country that used to be called Rhodesia until it was stolen by the Africans and renamed Zimbubuland or some such. His (white) family came here about 15 years ago when their farmland was "redistributed" among the blechs, as they call them. He has proved to be a useful enough young man, once I had got it into his thick skull that we like our lawns green and well-manicured rather than the tundra-like expanse he was so keen to produce. Perhaps he was homesick?
He also attends to the pool, though we did have him tested (three times) for The Aids before we allowed this.
The accent is ugly and incomprehensible, but these folk are mostly literate and so we communicate by notes. And it is good to give employment to these unfortunates.
Proverbs 19:17
Yours in Faith,
Joanna
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-06-2015, 01:44 PM
Dear Franklin and dear Pearl,
Quote:
Originally Posted by FranklinAndPearl
Franklin and I are currently having trouble finding a good Negress who will not backtalk or steal.
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I am afraid your overly optimistic search will not lead to a fruitful result. As blacks bear the Curse of Ham (Gen. 9:20–27) they are simply incapable of being decent people. They will steal and refuse to properly clean themselves because that is their nature. There is very little difference between animals and blacks.
There is a solution though. In the Second World War the Germans devised a brilliant way to handle the millions of Jesus killers (Jews) under their gentle care. Like blacks, Jews are unreliable, dangerous and they smell bad if you don't force them to take a shower. The German solution was to take the worst of the worst and make them the boss over all the other Jesus haters. They called this person a Capo. A very effective and economic approach. Only a very small amount of SS-Sturmhauptführers where needed to control millions and millions of unreliable Jews.
So all you need to do is to find a black criminal, not very hard to do, and make him the boss of all other blacks working for you! I pray this will solve your dilemma.
Yours in Christ,
Pastor J.C. Manning, M.D., Ph.D.
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THE BIBLE SAYS THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY TO HEAVEN!
Jesus said: "I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me." John 14:6
ONLY JESUS CAN SAVE YOU!
"That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus,
and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him
from the dead, thou shalt be saved." Romans 10:9
1. Admit you are a worthless sinner. Romans 3:10
2. Be willing to turn from sin (repent). Acts 17:30
3. Believe that Jesus Christ died for you, was buried and
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4. Through prayer, invite Jesus into your life to become
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Lord Jesus, I know that I have sinned against you.
I know that I am not perfect and that I can never
please you through my own efforts. I know that I
deserve to be judged according to my sins. And, I
know that I have absolutely nothing to offer you.
Lord Jesus, I ask you to forgive me. I do not rely
on myself but only on you and I receive you as
Lord of my life and as savior of my soul.
Lord Jesus, please save me!
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4. Tell others about Jesus Christ
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True Christian™ Just a Regular Nice Guy
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-06-2015, 08:31 PM
To add to Pastor Manning's excellent advice, give the big darkie a whistle. They love whistles. For fun, remove the pea from it.
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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True Christians™
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Re: Question: Where did you get your colored help? -
03-07-2015, 06:06 AM
Hi friends! Even more wonderful advice! How exciting!
Sister Joanna, I will look into 'white coloreds'. We are currently test-running an elderly Negress we harvested from a KFC in the city. I asked her about it, and she replied with something about "the more whiter the more I want to bite her"...I do not understand what that means but she is a savage, so what can I do. Maybe I will type white coloreds into www.bing.com.
Pastor J.C. Manning, are not all darkies criminals??? I thought they were. How will they decide who is the alpha??
LOL Brother James, Franklin loved the whistle idea. Taking out the pea had him doubled over with laughter. Franklin does love a good Negro prank. His favorite thing to do with our colored help is tamper with the brakes on whatever car from 1978 they are driving.
Thank you all again for the new suggestions!
Walking with Christ,
Pearl
Just a loving, saved, MARRIED HETEROSEXUAL couple sharing this account! Wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww Hi Carol, not sure why the Face book isn't typing out my letters, LOL. I hope you can see this message, none of the letters are going in the box. Maybe they are invisible? We do not really understand Computers or Technology. I will have to ask Anita about this. See you tomor
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