[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Homer Test:

Please write down the numbers 1 through 6 and then write down the number you see in each circle:

Now view the results:
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1. You should see 79, otherwise you might be a homer
2. You should see 33, otherwise you might be a homer
3. You should see 94, otherwise you might be a homer
4. You should see 33, otherwise you might be a homer
5. You should see 7, otherwise you might be a homer
6. You should see 29, otherwise you might be a homer

If you have one indication that you might be a homer, that's OK, you probably played a lot of sports and really like your mom.

If you have two indications that you might be a homer, take a few cold showers weekly, you probably have been influenced by The Wizard of Oz.

If you have three indications that you might be a homer, keep away from males at all costs, pray hourly and stop criticising room decor.

If you have four indications that you might be a homer, you have reached "Abomination Level 1", you are a hairdresser and/or have no bones in your wrists.

If you have five indications that you might be a homer, you have reached "Abomination Level 2", eternal damnation is assured, you cannot deny that you come in through the catflap and your best friend is probably called Cecil.

If you have six indications that you might be a homer, you have reached "Vile Abomination Level", eternal damnation is assured, in the interests of not spreading AIDS, please report yourself to a Moderator to be banned.

[Palmer C. Eldrich]

I didn't take the test because I already know that I'm not a homer. Anyone who took the test needs to speak to their pastor because if you didn't know, already, you might just be one.

[Daniel the Sodomite]

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

No, not really. If a bum off the street looks up at the clouds and says "God must of put pillows in the clouds for when we die." Then another man walks by and says "No, They're clear water crystals settling on dust in the atmosphere." That's not personal preference. That's a fact.

Sorry ta burst yo bubble, sweety, but that ain't a fact. Blind irrational belief is blind irrational belief no matter who you blindly believe in. You blindly believe in these secular scientists for no other reason than they wrote a book full of claims you aren't qualified to corroborate. Oh, look at me! I’m a cloud scientist! Everything I say bout clouds must be God’s honest truth and ya have to believe me because I’m an official cloudologist!! For all your tiny brain knows, there might be pillows on the clouds. How the heck do you know there ain't? Let me guess, you took some liberal nerd's word for it?

Hmmm, who am I gonna believe? Some lonely dork with glasses that masturbates to National Geographic in his grandma's basement and comes out with a new theory every other week or the Creator of the Universe who was there and did all the creating? Pretty easy choice, sugar.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

I used to think that too, That most atheists on the internet were just these people that followed a crowd of rebellions who adopted atheism and don't do any actual research on the claims they make, and make arguments full of ad-hominem attack against all religion they see. After drifting from agnostic, atheist and Christianity I realized you can't chose to be an atheist. If you are above average IQ, open to any truth you can find, and research, you will become an atheist.

OMG, there is like totally soooo much wrongness in that paragraph I don't even know where ta begin.

Ya start off about atheism being nothing but a childish excuse to fling personal attacks like poo and rebel against their Creator. Then ya end by insinuating that anyone who don't think like you is of below average IQ and close-minded. Hmph, I'm not surprised one bit that you didn't break the mold. News flash! IQ is more about one's quickness to pick up on things and retain that knowledge. Not so much about how they use it once they learned it. I'm a 139 myself. I knew a girl with an IQ of 166 - she got killed by a released criminal she was "dating" via phone and mail. Not too smart that one. And let me guess, "truth" equals whatever the heck coincides with your personal opinions. Mm-hmm! Yeah, I bet.

"Open to any truth I can find"? What in Sam hell is that supposed to mean anyway? If I believe any cockamamie theory of the hour and get myself ignorant enough of real truths that stand the test of time I'll become an atheist? Cause there ain't a damn thing in this whole entire world that can disprove our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I bet you think pies bake themselves because you found a recipe on Google. Who needs a baker when you know how it was baked, right? That's just ignorant. Atheism = ignorance.

[CultusBulimia]

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

Sorry ta burst yo bubble, sweety, but that ain't a fact.

I'm not trying to offend, but please oh please stop typing like that.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

Blind irrational belief is blind irrational belief no matter who you blindly believe in. You blindly believe in these secular scientists for no other reason than they wrote a book full of claims you aren't qualified to corroborate.

I could just as easily reverse that and say you blindly believe in the bible. So your argument holds no water. Watch me do it to your quote now!

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

Blind irrational belief is blind irrational belief no matter who you blindly believe in. You blindly believe in these desert tribemen for no other reason than they wrote a book full of claims you aren't qualified to corroborate.

See that? I changed two words.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

Oh, look at me! I’m a cloud scientist! Everything I say bout clouds must be God’s honest truth and ya have to believe me because I’m an official cloudologist!! For all your tiny brain knows, there might be pillows on the clouds. How the heck do you know there ain't? Let me guess, you took some liberal nerd's word for it?

I'm a liberal. Yep. The people who try to make it legal for you to marry whoever the piffle you want.
You say you're a sodomite, so I don't understand why you are against them. Secondly, we're not in the dark ages anymore, we know how stuff works, SCIENCE created the computer you're using right now, So If you don't believe in science, throw your computer in the garbage and go in the corner and pray to your god to make you a new computer. Now before you get all up in arms, I'm not a science freak who goes around wacking christians over the head with biology textbooks. You don't need to be a scientist to know that the earth is a sphere. or that we revolve around the sun, or how clouds work.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

Hmmm, who am I gonna believe? Some lonely dork with glasses that masturbates to National Geographic in his grandma's basement and comes out with a new theory every other week or the Creator of the Universe who was there and did all the creating? Pretty easy choice, sugar.

I don't wear glasses, I don't masturbate to NatGeo (Although thanks for the idea) and I don't come up with theories of anything. I don't know how the universe was created, I'm not a scientist, I don't care.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

OMG, there is like totally soooo much wrongness in that paragraph I don't even know where ta begin.

Ya start off about atheism being nothing but a childish excuse to fling personal attacks like poo and rebel against their Creator. Then ya end by insinuating that anyone who don't think like you is of below average IQ and close-minded. Hmph, I'm not surprised one bit that you didn't break the mold. News flash! IQ is more about one's quickness to pick up on things and retain that knowledge. Not so much about how they use it once they learned it. I'm a 139 myself.

Outright lie.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

I knew a girl with an IQ of 166 - she got killed by a released criminal she was "dating" via phone and mail. Not too smart that one. And let me guess, "truth" equals whatever the heck coincides with your personal opinions. Mm-hmm! Yeah, I bet.

no mother piffle, My truth is backed up with piffleing facts. Not a book that contradicts itself every other chapter. meanwhile there is thousands of other holy texts claiming they are the real inspired word of the creator.
People of above average intelligence are more prone to atheism. Or some just want an excuse to be a rebel anti-theist on youtube. I find the happy medium between the two.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

"Open to any truth I can find"? What in Sam hell is that supposed to mean anyway? If I believe any cockamamie theory of the hour and get myself ignorant enough of real truths that stand the test of time I'll become an atheist?

Atheism doesn't mean you have to believe in evolution or the big bang or science, Atheism is lack of belief of god. I guess you could call it a mental illness if you want, I'd call it an advantage.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

Cause there ain't a damn thing in this whole entire world that can disprove our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

because "god" is an unfalsifiable hypothesis. Your bible however is not unfalsifiable, we have proved evolution, the world is a sphere and that the world is not 6k years old.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

I bet you think pies bake themselves because you found a recipe on Google. Who needs a baker when you know how it was baked, right? That's just ignorant. Atheism = ignorance.

That was the worst analogy I've ever seen.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Queer fight! Queer fight!

[loveforchrist]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

Queer fight! Queer fight!

Haha, I love it when unsaved trash fight with each other. It's just entertaining.

[Daniel the Sodomite]

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

I'm not trying to offend, but please oh please stop typing like that. I could just as easily reverse that and say you blindly believe in the bible. So your argument holds no water. Watch me do it to your quote now!

You failed. I don't blindly believe in the Bible. I KNOW the Bible is 100% pure truth. No need for belief, you silly goose.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

You say you're a sodomite...

WHOOOOOA!!! STOP... THE... PRESS, MISTER!

I am NOT a sodomite. Pastor Zeke changed my name because he had a bit of a hissy fit cause I hurt his lil feelwings . The poor thing probably cried himself to sleep. He's a sensitive sort. I swear that man bleeds once a month like a woman. I forget sometimes that my macho alpha male masculinity can sometimes make a sensitive man like Zeke feel small. I gotta work on not being such a bully. Anyway, I detest sodomites. I can't believe I used to do those things. Eww, it just ain't sanitary.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

Secondly, we're not in the dark ages anymore, we know how stuff works, SCIENCE created the computer you're using right now, So If you don't believe in science, throw your computer in the garbage and go in the corner and pray to your god to make you a new computer.

Jesus made my computer and yours. Science is not an entity that can create anything. Science is the art of observation. Nothing more. And what the heck does a computer have to do with clouds? Why is you tryin ta change the subject? Sore loser, anybody? You have to be the most illogical buffoon I've encountered on this forum.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

Now before you get all up in arms, I'm not a science freak who goes around wacking christians over the head with biology textbooks. You don't need to be a scientist to know that the earth is a sphere. or that we revolve around the sun, or how clouds work. I don't wear glasses, I don't masturbate to NatGeo (Although thanks for the idea) and I don't come up with theories of anything. I don't know how the universe was created, I'm not a scientist, I don't care

If you ain't a scientist why do you blindly believe in them? If you had the knowhow and capability to verify their claims for yourself you wouldn't need them to tell you anything. If you don't have the knowhow or capability then you're not in a position to comment on rather their supposed findings are fact or not. See how illogical you are, dull stone? Don't get all high n mighty with me, sir!

Atheists masturbate to bugs and animals on “NatGeo”? Ewwww, yucky yucky ICK!!! Ooh, you is sicknin!! That's nasty! YOUR NASTY!!!

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

Outright lie. no mother piffle, My truth is backed up with piffleing facts. Not a book that contradicts itself every other chapter. meanwhile there is thousands of other holy texts claiming they are the real inspired word of the creator.

Oh my, another sensitive lil baby havin a hissy fit. Um, I think your va-jay-jay is bleeding. Ya might wanna get that checked, O-kaaaaay?

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

People of above average intelligence are more prone to atheism. Or some just want an excuse to be a rebel anti-theist on youtube. I find the happy medium between the two.

People of an above higher intelligence wouldn’t go making claims they can’t back up. Prove there is no God? I’m sorry, sweety, but EVERYTHING bears witness to God’s Glory and there ain’t no way anyone can honestly deny it so you is just being a rebellious little ninny.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

Atheism is lack of belief of god. I guess you could call it a mental illness

Yes, I could and will... because denyin that water is wet has be be due to a demon and we all know "mental illness" is just another term for demons in the heart.

[CultusBulimia]

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

You failed. I don't blindly believe in the Bible. I KNOW the Bible is 100% pure truth. No need for belief, you silly goose.

Yes you do, because if you say I blindly believe science, you blindly believe the bible.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

Jesus made my computer and yours. Science is not an entity that can create anything. Science is the art of observation. Nothing more. And what the heck does a computer have to do with clouds? Why is you tryin ta change the subject? Sore loser, anybody? You have to be the most illogical buffoon I've encountered on this forum.

Never said anything abut clouds and computers together, I think you're the sore loser because you're resorting to ad-hominem attacks.

Also, if you want to prove that i am illogical you need to make a rational argument that's backed up by facts.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

If you ain't a scientist why do you blindly believe in them? If you had the knowhow and capability to verify their claims for yourself you wouldn't need them to tell you anything. If you don't have the knowhow or capability then you're not in a position to comment on rather their supposed findings are fact or not. See how illogical you are, dull stone? Don't get all high n mighty with me, sir!

To learn something, you need someone of knowledge and integrity to teach you something, you then observe it for yourself and come to a conclusion. This is why school exists. Now heres something interesting. America, Is a Christian nation, 90 percent of people are Christian. 4 of the 10 commandments are laws. Circumcision is practiced in america because of the bible, Gay marriage is outlawed because of the bible. The republican right wingers that you guys love in this forum are in control the house, and in 2012 probably the white house. Now the interesting thing is that evolution is still taught in school, along with that the earth is spherical. Even though republicans and conservatives have been in control. George W bush was in for 8 years and we still teach evolution. It's because they are facts. Stop being in denial.

Originally Posted by Daniel the Sodomite

People of an above higher intelligence wouldn’t go making claims they can’t back up. Prove there is no God? I’m sorry, sweety, but EVERYTHING bears witness to God’s Glory and there ain’t no way anyone can honestly deny it so you is just being a rebellious little ninny.

Yo're making the claim your below average intelligence because you can't prove god. All the claims I made I can back up with facts.

Now I want to ask you two questions.

1. Why is evolution and spherical earth taught in school even though republicans, George bush and 90% of america believe in god, Wouldn't they be able to overrule it and teach intelligent design?
2. How can you accept the contradictions in the bible? When I was a Christian I was not able to find an answer for it from anyone, maybe you can enlighten me.
Feel free to ask questions.

[SisterStacy]

You must be a homer for event knowing this stuff!!!!!! burn in hell clay aiken!

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

Now I want to ask you two questions.

1. Why is evolution and spherical earth taught in school even though republicans, George bush and 90% of america believe in god, Wouldn't they be able to overrule it and teach intelligent design?

Liberals and their community activists have the government terrified into submission so the Republicans can't change teach the geocentric controversy. Liberal judges have the GOPs hands tied.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

2. How can you accept the contradictions in the bible? When I was a Christian I was not able to find an answer for it from anyone, maybe you can enlighten me.
Feel free to ask questions.

There are not contradictions in The Bible. Since you are a silly women you just don't understand God's flawless message of unconditional love and compassion.

[CultusBulimia]

Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe

Liberals and their community activists have the government terrified into submission so the Republicans can't change teach the geocentric controversy. Liberal judges have the GOPs hands tied.
There are not contradictions in The Bible. Since you are a silly women you just don't understand God's flawless message of unconditional love and compassion.

See signature for bible contradiction

Yes, the small 10% of liberals will stop the entire republican party!

[loveforchrist]

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

See signature for bible contradiction

Yes, the small 10% of liberals will stop the entire republican party!

How is that a contradiction

[Daniel the Sodomite]

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

Yes you do, because if you say I blindly believe science, you blindly believe the bible.

So basically, "I know you are, but what am I"? Really? The Pee-Wee Herman defense? That's the best you got? You sure are a real nincompoop, you know that? You're slower than a river in Antarctica.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

Never said anything about clouds and computers together

You sneaky snake, you claimed that denying the "vapor cloud theory" was tantamount to denying the existence of computers.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

Also, if you want to prove that i am illogical you need to make a rational argument that's backed up by facts.

The Bible is full of facts provided by the Creator of everything, darling. Goin against the facts is pretty darn illogical.

I have a coin in my fist. I tell you it's a 99 cent piece.

Do you believe me or do you believe a lil yellow commie from China theorizing that I have a nickel, quarter, dime, penny, fifty cent piece or silver dollar based on secular, liberal, know-it-all, progressive, elitist, democrat, welfare loving financial theories about how 99 cent pieces don't exist?

Obviously, you would believe me. I'm the one holding the coin. So obviously you gotta believe in Jesus cause he created everything. If you don't believe Jesus you're a imprudent, immature, illogical, irrational, irreprehensibly irresponsible, incompetent, injudicious, lil rebellious ninny without a lick of sense.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

To learn something, you need someone of knowledge and integrity to teach you something, you then observe it for yourself and come to a conclusion. This is why school exists. Blah blah blah

Are you a cloudologist or not? Yes or No?

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

Now heres something interesting. America, Is a Christian nation, 90 percent of people are Christian.

Anybody can claim to be a Christian, sugar. But are they True Christians™?

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

4 of the 10 commandments are laws. Circumcision is practiced in america because of the bible, Gay marriage is outlawed because of the bible. The republican right wingers that you guys love in this forum are in control the house, and in 2012 probably the white house. Now the interesting thing is that evolution is still taught in school, along with that the earth is spherical. Even though republicans and conservatives have been in control. George W bush was in for 8 years and we still teach evolution. It's because they are facts. Stop being in denial.

Wouldn't 10 of the 10 Commandments be laws in a True Christians™ nation?

There is no circumcision law, dimwit. Circumcision started to counter infections in male infants. It’s just become common place is all. Not that anyone is complainin. Uncircumcised penises are disgusting!! Ewww, Icky!!! Jesus and I must think the same way cause if I created men with nasty lil skin hoodies I’d demand they cut em off too.

In a True Christians™ nation the queers would be put to death, sweety. I'm grateful for gettin a second chance and havin the opportunity ta get cured and become a True Christians™ in all, but I'd have been swingin from an oak tree like an Alabama wind chime in a True Christians™ nation.

Liberal secular cabals run by Jewish sorcerers control the House, White House and the Senate. They promote evolution because it supports Jewish racist agenda to declare the rest of us as beasts in human form like they secret Jew books say we is.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

Yo're making the claim your below average intelligence because you can't prove god. All the claims I made I can back up with facts.

What the heck are you smoking? I can prove God exists.

Nothing you claim is backed up by any facts. You just blindly believe whatever secular scientist print in a book.

Originally Posted by CultusBulimia

1. Why is evolution and spherical earth taught in school even though republicans, George bush and 90% of america believe in god, Wouldn't they be able to overrule it and teach intelligent design? 2. How can you accept the contradictions in the bible? When I was a Christian I was not able to find an answer for it from anyone, maybe you can enlighten me.
Feel free to ask questions.

1. 90% of Americans are NOT True Christians™.

2. There are no contradictions in the Bible. You were simply tested and failed miserably. Probably because you’re not too bright.