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Professor of English Landover University
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Posts: 3,501
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Ministering to the Liebral Godless of New Zealand
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Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends. -
10-31-2006, 06:29 PM
It is clear that poor Kevin (cobraking) and his friends who were on these boards, have gone far astray from the Lord. They are a sad little group of children, immature, dysfunctional, and socialy inadequate, and deserve -- very much need -- our compassion and prayers.
These children have set up some forum for the purpose, it seems, of attacking the Lord and his favourite church Landover. What exactly they are trying to say is not clear. Their arguments are far too muddled and confused for any sense to be gleaned from them. Some of the time they seem be making some absurd claim about Landover not being real, and at other times they contradict this.
Poor Kevin has referred to us as "retards" because he says, our forum TOS is not true (he put it more coarsely than that). It is not true he says because he has spent some time checking maps and cannot find a "Freehold Iowa" on them.
This really is very sad. Kevin spends a lot of time looking for Freehold Iowa on a map, and then he calls us retards...
Of course it is well-known that Freehold is left off maps for security reasons (I can't of course say anymore than that).
So please pray for Kevin and his friends. It is plain that the situation with these sorry children is beyond any other hope -- The Lord alone will be able to help them.
Thank you.
Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
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Posts: 18,554
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends -
10-31-2006, 07:11 PM
I will pray for Kevin and his friends so see the error of their ways and stop trying to persecute Jesus' favorite Church. As a good Christian I forgive Kevin for his loser ways and pray that he and his friends may they also see their habit of drugging and sodomizing each other makes Jesus weep and will only land Kevin and his friends (sore) butts in Hell.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Posts: 9,311
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends -
10-31-2006, 07:25 PM
I'm not certain I understand the problem. Kevin only HAS two friends and between the three of them they can't screw in a light bulb. JESUS won't be interested in them until they are able to tithe a sufficient amount to gain entry into the Book of Life.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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True Christian™ Theologian
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends -
10-31-2006, 08:22 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Enobarbus
Of course it is well-known that Freehold is left off maps for security reasons (I can't of course say anymore than that).
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Exactly, the exact location of Freehold is classified.
Many military bases, such as Area 51 for one, isn't on PUBLIC maps either.
These poor children really needs to stop choking on satans tallywhacker and open their eyes to the truth.
If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
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Posts: 5,110
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Location: Red Peking
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends -
11-01-2006, 12:48 AM
I find it a touch on the astonishing side that kids who should be doing homework have nothing better to do that attack a chuch. Don't get me wrong, I don't agree with your views etc, but it's your right to practice whatever (in your case twisted) religion as you see fit.
Incidentally, shops in their area must ba at an all time low cheeto shortage. *snicker*
**Arg!! Why is this not letting me post??
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Spiritual Mother of LBC
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Posts: 6,341
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Location: Freehold, IA
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends -
11-01-2006, 03:18 AM
I am reminded of the Book of Deuteronomy, Chapter 32, verses 19&20;
"And when the LORD saw it, he abhorred them ... for they are ... children in whom is no faith (in LBC)."
And so it is with this in mind that I offer the following prayer;
Dear Lord, we pray for Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends, who are in need of Jesus' intervention. Despire our efforts, they are blind to the only true church and salvation that is Landover Baptist Church. We just ask that you help us to help them Lord, for they are blinded by false religion. Amen.
Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.
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LBC psychiatric outpatient. Progressing nicely.
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Posts: 989
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, IA
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends -
11-01-2006, 05:41 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Enobarbus
Poor Kevin has referred to us as "retards" because he says, our forum TOS is not true (he put it more coarsely than that). It is not true he says because he has spent some time checking maps and cannot find a "Freehold Iowa" on them.
This really is very sad. Kevin spends a lot of time looking for Freehold Iowa on a map, and then he calls us retards.. .
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Mr.Eno, i be layin my hands on the screen rite now, i prayin "lord Jesus, please remove that spirt of tardnesss from Mr.Kevin's over-rawt liddle brains , in the names of the father an the son an the holy spirt, amens!"
i be prayin that worked
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God Squad
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Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends -
11-01-2006, 07:19 AM
Dear God
You guided this lost youths to our site for a reason. That reason was to save them. Give us the strength not to give up on them.
Amen.
You know who is to blame, don't you? Hippy parents, libral schools, and a leftist media!
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
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Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends -
11-01-2006, 01:51 PM
I blame the Clintons.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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LBU Professor and Biblical Wordsmith Extraordinaire President of the Ex-Negro Academy Alumni Association Freehold Best Tan Award winner, 10 yrs running
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Posts: 2,048
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Location: Chateau Lebeau (Freehold, Iowa)
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CobraKing and his friends -
11-02-2006, 06:18 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
I blame the Clintons.
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I chalk it all up to another case of nancy boys will be nancy boys. The obsession with with wrestling(sweaty homers in speedos pounding against each other) and Japanese girlie man cartoon characters is a clear sign of homo erotic teen angst.
Can they truly be Saved™?
The Lord says, "If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them."
But I guess as long as they are over in San Fransisco or whatever truck stop they frequent with their laptops beyond the reach of Jesus's earthly hands we can attempt to Save™ their souls.
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Night Hag
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Location: Enzed
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends. -
11-11-2006, 02:57 AM
Kevin & co. are certainly blinded by something.
I think it's probably hormones.
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 41
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Meet Christian Singles
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends. -
11-12-2006, 10:17 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilith
Kevin & co. are certainly blinded by something.
I think it's probably hormones.
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c'mon now, who's to blame for that? This place is overflowing with sexy christer chicks yabberin' about "choo-choos" and "tallywhackers".....all those gals can be summed up by Thumpin' Blondie's avatar: a deep valley of unnaturally repressed babe bounty, straining against tight, tight seams.....break those bonds, baby.....oooh yeah.........
....the kids can't be held accountable for going a lil crazy.... aw heck, they just got a crush on the ladies, is all.
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Night Hag
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Posts: 1,231
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Location: Enzed
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends. -
11-13-2006, 01:31 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by VinnieVespisti
c'mon now, who's to blame for that? This place is overflowing with sexy christer chicks yabberin' about "choo-choos" and "tallywhackers".....all those gals can be summed up by Thumpin' Blondie's avatar: a deep valley of unnaturally repressed babe bounty, straining against tight, tight seams.....break those bonds, baby.....oooh yeah.........
....the kids can't be held accountable for going a lil crazy.... aw heck, they just got a crush on the ladies, is all.
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Ah jeez,Vinnie's back.
I THOUGHT I could smell his pungent hair oil!
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 41
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Meet Christian Singles
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends. -
11-14-2006, 10:17 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilith
Ah jeez,Vinnie's back.
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yeah my back does make the ladies go "ahhhh" and take the chister lord's name in vain, but you oughta stay on-topic - for the kids.
Quote:
I THOUGHT I could smell his pungent hair oil!
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then quit sniffin' my back.... cuz you just gonna make yourself go crazy lustin' after what you don't have, hunnybun.
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Night Hag
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Posts: 1,231
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Enzed
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Re: Kevin (CobraKing) and his friends. -
11-15-2006, 03:01 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by VinnieVespisti
yeah my back does make the ladies go "ahhhh" and take the chister lord's name in vain, but you oughta stay on-topic - for the kids.
then quit sniffin' my back.... cuz you just gonna make yourself go crazy lustin' after what you don't have, hunnybun.
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I realise you can't help having a somewhat hirsute back - but do you HAVE to plait it!
In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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