[Brother Harold Porter]

My Brothers,

I am writing an autobiography of my time that i wanted to be gay and hated God. But I have some difficulties with proper grammar, syntax and all of that.

First and foremost is my confusion with the word "anus". Not that I have not seen my share, up close and personal. And I will pass through the gates to heaven admitting that I have stabbed and violently sodomized many of them. Most of them unwilling participants in seedy motels. I am so sorry..

But I am coming clean with God. And I want to get my sin off my chest, neck and lower back.

Is the proper American plural word "anuses" or "ani"? I'm hoping my works will be published to save other fags from certain doom.

I will have other questions as I write of my life of filthy homo-rectal intercoursing.

In Him

[Phil Ander]

I think most American lexicographers prefer anuses

[Didymus Much]

I think most American lexicographers don't know the word "lexicographers".

[refridgerator]

I share your concern about writting properly.

Too bad you don´t have an institution dedicated to oversee english language like we have the Real Academia Española.


In this situation you should change the word completely to avoid confusion.


Why don´t just write butthole?

[Titus Templeton]

Maybe we can talk with Mayor Hold to make this book a part of the school teachings. Could be a very intense lesson for our youngsters about the horrors of homosexuality.

[Roland]

Perhaps you should turn to the Bible. How does God refer to butt holes? My Bible knowledge is limited, I still haven´t finished reading it. Some Bible translation speaks of an ¨Ani¨, it is not the KJV so I doubt you would be interested. All the best with your search for the right answer!

Kind regards,

Roland

[BrotherLarry]

My Dearest Brother Porter,


What a shining example you are to all men. My young heart rejoiced within my muscled, toned, rippling chest as I read about your upcoming tome.


Some sensitive eyes might be averse to the word a-n-u-s, so like another poster suggested, perhaps you could change the word entirely. "Posteriorly Located Orifice" is easily pluralized, for example, and will make you sound quite brilliant. Being an educated, certified equine gnathologist, I find it quite important to sound brilliant, and I often do.


While I know this book is to be your personal story, do not hesitate to ask for stories of homer men I have known and ministered to if it will help prove a point as you write. I have known many and have brought them to their knees; if it's helpful to you I will share more about it with you.


I am still grateful for your help with my friend Lance. He remains free of unnatural desires and while he still doesn't speak to me, he has a lovely girlfriend now.


In Our Redeemer,
BrotherLarry


PS: I love you.

[Brother Harold Porter]

Thank you, my Brothers in Christ.

I am working on my prologue. I wish my parents had blessed me with Biblical instruction.

Without the Word of God, I was thrusting at the age of 3. And why not?

Who could blame ME? Is it not predictable to think that a toddler that couples with a teddy bear would eventually anally rape other men?

And I LOVED the gay sex, but only because i hated God. And this is what it is all about.

Hate God? Rectal intercourse.

Love God? No homo activity.

I have a good sense of how I will write my book!

In Christ

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

This book has the makings of a best-seller. Today's America is ready to hear the true story by first person account of a successful gaysexual conversion. Not many know of the depravity you've seen - and perpetrated. It could be an American classic novel, a cross between:

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn

and

You Can't Win: the Autobiography of Jack Black

and

The Crucible

These could chronicle the innocence at which you were lured in by homosexual agenda (raping teddy bears at the age of 3!), the depravity and resentment that drove you to continue self-abusing for all those years and finally the bright shining fire of Jesus that cleansed your anus of sin.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole

This book has the makings of a best-seller. Today's America is ready to hear the true story by first person account of a successful gaysexual conversion. .... the depravity and resentment that drove you to continue self-abusing for all those years and finally the bright shining fire of Jesus that cleansed your anus of sin.

I think Brother Porter's book will be the one that turns back to plague of homerism that has infected this country. Those practicing anal sex will see they need not lead such unhappy sinful lives but can find in Jesus the happiness they need.

I'm, of course, always promoting Freehold. I hope the book tour starts here so we can take our rightful place as ground zero for healing homerism through Jesus.