Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > The introduction forum
Reload this Page Hi.
The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Perplexed's Avatar
Perplexed Perplexed is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
 
Posts: 2
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: In bed with my fag boyfriend
Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Perplexed is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Hi. - 03-01-2015, 09:56 PM

I need no introductions other than a simple 'Hello.'

I am a simple person that way.

I'll just be here. Browsing posts.

Hope to see good folks around! c:


This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. --ADMIN
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
Witch Hammer's Avatar
Witch Hammer Witch Hammer is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

2010 Witch Hunt Award One Year/1000 posts 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Christian Provider™ award Pro-Life True Christian™ Friend of Jesus Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Porn Resistant Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Pro-Life True Republican Saved 5 Years Tell her once Christian Love The Lord’s Witness Wound Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Flat Earth Persecuted Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Punched the most queers Eats the Most Pork Kirk Cameron Fan Club Mission to Korea Uber Angels Driver Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016!

 
Posts: 1,716
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the midst of His Will®
Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Hi. - 03-01-2015, 09:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Perplexed View Post
I need no introductions other than a simple 'Hello.'

I am a simple person that way.

I'll just be here. Browsing posts.

Hope to see good folks around! c:
Pastors, would it be asking too much to create a 'special' sub-forum just for retards?
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
Esther B. Esther B. is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member

Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Quiverful

 
Posts: 582
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Under the watchful eye of my husband
Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Hi. - 03-01-2015, 11:17 PM

A cautious welcome to you. A "hello" is not good enough for us. I'm sure that there are other people besides myself who would like to know more about you. What made you decide to come here? How did you find Jesus? Have you read the KJV Bible from front to back?


And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
Deuteronomy 6.5
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson's Avatar
Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member

Friend of Jesus Heaven Bound Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Prayer Warrior Best stoning bucket A for Effort One Year/1000 posts Donald Trump 2016! Trumpette Mission to Messico 2015 Witch Hunt Award

 
Posts: 1,330
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: In the kitchen
Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Hi. - 03-01-2015, 11:34 PM

Can you not read the instructions? I promise, it's not that hard! Tell me what church you attend, what is your favorite Bible verse, your name, and age. That's pretty simple. If you want to make a good impression, following the rules would be a good start.


"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
Mary Etheldreda's Avatar
Mary Etheldreda Mary Etheldreda is offline
Gushing for Jesus
 

Protected by JESUS Christian Love Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture Cleanest Kitchen Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Persecuted Pro-Life Most Obedient Friend of Jesus True Christian Homemaker True Christian Beauty 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College True Republican Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls Quiverful Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls Super Soaker Baptism Award 3rd Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts True Christian Lady Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Tomato Staker Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Saved 1 Year Prayer Warrior The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking The Hatchet Child Rearing Award 4th Year Bible College Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion Babysitter Stamp of Approval Home Schooled Trump of GOD Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch The Lord’s Witness Wound The Lord’s Witness Wound Donald Trump 2016! Trumpette Anti-sodomy Mama Grizzly Platinum Tither Best stoning bucket 2015 Witch Hunt Award Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Crown of Glory Crown of Rejoicing Saved 5 Years BFF of Jesus Gunfest '14 Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts 20,000 posts Crown of Righteousness Flat Earth Anti-abortion GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden Public Awareness Medal

 
Posts: 23,729
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Hi. - 03-02-2015, 12:00 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Perplexed View Post
I need no introductions other than a simple 'Hello.'
Nonsense. No one asked what you need. The whole purpose of our friendly forum is to give what Jesus needs, and that's our fear and obedience and devotion and unconditional surrender!

When will you do the same?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Perplexed View Post
I am a simple person that way.
Simpleton is more like it.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Perplexed View Post
I'll just be here. Browsing posts.

Hope to see good folks around! c:

Don't be silly When you registered with our forum, you were invited to join us with a sense of fellowship that you are among brothers and sisters who wish nothing more than to share the good news that Jesus Christ is going to send every single person on Earth who doesn't believe in Him, straight to Hell. If you are saved, please feel free to interact with us. If you are unsaved, please leave now.



Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved